Should I not keep space and mind both "clutter free"?
It needs to be 2 simple sentences but catchy enough to remember. It's for a dorm room makeover, which I have titled, "Making the Grade".
Too cliche?
I think the first sentence is a bit of a cliche, but your original wording works fine and is catchy. It's the second sentence that is the problem as far as "flow" goes. It sounds too convoluted and packed with information, kind of like something I would write, lol.
Content-wise however, it's a different story. As it is now you're first saying that "clutter free" is good but then in the very next sentence you add colourful punches which adds clutter to some extent. I think your idea is all in the second sentence (to offer both relaxation and stimulation) and the first sentence distracts from that.
I'll see if I can come up with an alternative without putting too much effort into it, lol.
I don't think you need to describe the "punches of colour" or the "plain background" because they speak for themselves. At least if you're going to use this the way I imagine it (as a catchphrase to go with a picture of your work).
OK, so talking about weird sounds... There's a pond near my house that is home to some Canadian geese, beavers and other assorted fish and fowl. At night that thing comes alive with an assortment of weird noises. Do geese quack or yortle or whatever they do, all night? They never shut up! Then I hear what sounds like a man moaning...swear to God it sounds like someone's dying, but I was told it was bull frogs. Then the owls start up with that woooo hoooooo noise at all hours.
We have these dinks around in the spring before the pool is shocked....so annoying, but they leave on their own as soon as the pool is treated.
What is the pool treated with that makes frogs go away?
As you know, I tried everything to drive away the bullfrogs in my pond, before I had to resort to my "scientific experiments" on them. (NOTE: 100% of frogs tested could not fly.)
They've been gone for quite awhile, but if they come back and there's something I can put in my pond that will save me from have to do my scientific experiments on them, I'm all for it.
We have these dinks around in the spring before the pool is shocked....so annoying, but they leave on their own as soon as the pool is treated.
What is the pool treated with that makes frogs go away?
As you know, I tried everything to drive away the bullfrogs in my pond, before I had to resort to my "scientific experiments" on them. (NOTE: 100% of frogs tested could not fly.)
They've been gone for quite awhile, but if they come back and there's something I can put in my pond that will save me from have to do my scientific experiments on them, I'm all for it.
It's a salt water pool, so maybe you can find a way to make your pond a salt water pond...?
What is the pool treated with that makes frogs go away?
As you know, I tried everything to drive away the bullfrogs in my pond, before I had to resort to my "scientific experiments" on them. (NOTE: 100% of frogs tested could not fly.)
They've been gone for quite awhile, but if they come back and there's something I can put in my pond that will save me from have to do my scientific experiments on them, I'm all for it.
It's a salt water pool, so maybe you can find a way to make your pond a salt water pond...?
And thanks for the help guys.
Thanks, I'll keep that in mind if those monsters ever come back.
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