I had my heart broken... I gave my love to the wrong person. That person didn't want what I wanted.
This happens. But because this happened I learned, about me and about how to approach a new love. Having your heart broken doesn't have to be a negative thing, it can make you wiser. For example, I used to date only hot looking men, never a fat guy, I wasn't fat in my twenties and I didn't realize I was being vain and looking for all the wrong things in a person. Getting my heart crushed taught me valuable life lessons in learning how to value content of character in a person above all else. Now I don't care if he's fat, short, tall, bald, or hairy.... I look at what's in his heart. I learned that some men are not worth my time, and the men I would have been attracted to in the past would not stand a chance with me now. I am fat now, and being fat helped me to see how vain people can be. Because I am fat, these past 8 years has shown me much about how people treat others first hand. I can't believe I was such an asshole before. I was just like these vain people I can't stand the sight of now. Now beauty to me means something different, something much deeper... now I am ready for real love and now I know how to find it. I am fat, and I met a man that likes me just the way I am, I don't need to lose weight unless I want to. I have young children... 3 I met a man that is OK with me putting their needs first and is patient enough to understand why. I am not rich, I don't have to go out of my way to impress him, he likes me just the way I am. He is the most beautiful man I have met... I respect him. He is a good man and worth my time. Our relationship is new, but it looks like it can last. If it doesn't then that's OK too. See... it's knowledge like that that makes finding love easier, until then you will have to fumble on through until you learn what you should really be looking for in a mate. Beautiful people can be quite ugly, and can hurt you, so you have to choose carefully who to love... but you must learn to love yourself first. This way who ever you decide to try again with will benefit being with you as well and not be your crutch. [Edited 3/31/10 8:12am] | |
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MrsMdiver said: florescent said: I could be pregnant and give birth over and over. I actually really loved it. It's the looking after babies part that I don't like Well, do it when you are reallllly close to 40. No, actually, I did not enjoy being pregnant, though I knew I wouldn't. I did not like my body changing and being less bendy. I was pregnant longer than most since he was 17 days overdue. It got really old. I am glad I did it once but as you said, it is a lot to take care of once they have arrived. I couldn't handle that. I was very lucky that mine were bang on time. The last few weeks are uncomfortable tho | |
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florescent said: MrsMdiver said: Well, do it when you are reallllly close to 40. No, actually, I did not enjoy being pregnant, though I knew I wouldn't. I did not like my body changing and being less bendy. I was pregnant longer than most since he was 17 days overdue. It got really old. I am glad I did it once but as you said, it is a lot to take care of once they have arrived. I couldn't handle that. I was very lucky that mine were bang on time. The last few weeks are uncomfortable tho It sucked and I will remind him of how lazy he was when he is old enough to understand. J/K | |
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MrsMdiver said: florescent said: I couldn't handle that. I was very lucky that mine were bang on time. The last few weeks are uncomfortable tho It sucked and I will remind him of how lazy he was when he is old enough to understand. J/K | |
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I've had one very serious relationship (with my daughter's father), and one, what we'll call, an "exclusive" one. I've dated others.
I have problems with relationships because men have trouble with the fact that I only really have male friends. Ever since I was young, I've never associated with females, 'cause I've always been one of the boys. In my adult life, boyfriends get all insecure and become whiny bitches about it. Believe it or not, you can have friends of the opposite sex without fucking them. Shocking concept, I know. AND... I'm never having any more kids, OR getting married. I do nothing professionally. I only do things for fun. johnart: Acrylic's old bras is where tits of all sizes go to frolic after they die. Tit Heaven. | |
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Relationships?
About a couple of thousands? I have a "relationship" to every single one of you, every person from my family, every one of my friends, every one I don't like - sometimes it is better and more fruitful and sometimes it's not at all. "Love" means something different to all of us, therefore one can't really tell how many times they have been "in love"; it is different with every person and makes you remember a person in your special way, that's why all of us connect something precious with the word "love". Now, if you can clearly tell me what it takes for a relationship between me and another human being to be a "romantic relationship", or whatever you call it, then I could tell you... But you should treat every human being you have a relationship with (and that is every human being you know) with respect, honour and honesty; you shouldn't cheat on anybody (and by cheat I mean being disrespectful, not being honest and to lie. We shouldn't care about someone giving their love to someone else, - what hurts us is that we do not feel respected and that we feel lied to) you meet. Actually, it's like the bible: I do not need it to tell me not to kill and to respect my parents and to treat my neighbours right. My conscience tells me all that. Therefore I do not need the "official status of a relationship" to tell me what is good or bad. As long as I'm honest and respectful it should be good. If it doesn't work that way, then there's something wrong anyway; - forcing yourself into something, just because a "relationship" requires it is always wrong and will make someone very unhappy in the end. If I feel very close to someone, I will care a lot about that person and I will not be sexually interested in other women (for example). It all happens automatically, as long as you are honest and respectful. That's why I can't really answer, nor understand your question. [Edited 3/31/10 8:30am] | |
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Dave1992 said: Relationships?
About a couple of thousands? I have a "relationship" to every single one of you, every person from my family, every one of my friends, every one I don't like - sometimes it is better and more fruitful and sometimes it's not at all. "Love" means something different to all of us, therefore one can't really tell how many times they have been "in love"; it is different with every person and makes you remember a person in your special way, that's why all of us connect something precious with the word "love". Now, if you can clearly tell me what it takes for a relationship between me and another human being to be a "romantic relationship", or whatever you call it, then I could tell you... But you should treat every human being you have a relationship with (and that is every human being you know) with respect, honour and honesty; you shouldn't cheat on anybody (and by cheat I mean being disrespectful, not being honest and to lie. We shouldn't care about someone giving their love to someone else, - what hurts us is that we do not feel respected and that we feel lied to) you meet. Actually, it's like the bible: I do not need it to tell me not to kill and to respect my parents and to treat my neighbours right. My conscience tells me all that. Therefore I do not need the "official status of a relationship" to tell me what is good or bad. As long as I'm honest and respectful it should be good. If it doesn't work that way, then there's something wrong anyway; - forcing yourself into something, just because a "relationship" requires it is always wrong and will make someone very unhappy in the end. If I feel very close to someone, I will care a lot about that person and I will not be sexually interested in other women (for example). It all happens automatically, as long as you are honest and respectful. That's why I can't really answer, nor understand your question. [Edited 3/31/10 8:30am] Bullshit well, you do young Jedi | |
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vivid said: Dave1992 said: Relationships?
About a couple of thousands? I have a "relationship" to every single one of you, every person from my family, every one of my friends, every one I don't like - sometimes it is better and more fruitful and sometimes it's not at all. "Love" means something different to all of us, therefore one can't really tell how many times they have been "in love"; it is different with every person and makes you remember a person in your special way, that's why all of us connect something precious with the word "love". Now, if you can clearly tell me what it takes for a relationship between me and another human being to be a "romantic relationship", or whatever you call it, then I could tell you... But you should treat every human being you have a relationship with (and that is every human being you know) with respect, honour and honesty; you shouldn't cheat on anybody (and by cheat I mean being disrespectful, not being honest and to lie. We shouldn't care about someone giving their love to someone else, - what hurts us is that we do not feel respected and that we feel lied to) you meet. Actually, it's like the bible: I do not need it to tell me not to kill and to respect my parents and to treat my neighbours right. My conscience tells me all that. Therefore I do not need the "official status of a relationship" to tell me what is good or bad. As long as I'm honest and respectful it should be good. If it doesn't work that way, then there's something wrong anyway; - forcing yourself into something, just because a "relationship" requires it is always wrong and will make someone very unhappy in the end. If I feel very close to someone, I will care a lot about that person and I will not be sexually interested in other women (for example). It all happens automatically, as long as you are honest and respectful. That's why I can't really answer, nor understand your question. [Edited 3/31/10 8:30am] Bullshit well, you do young Jedi You saying that what I wrote is bullshit? | |
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Dave1992 said: Relationships?
About a couple of thousands? I have a "relationship" to every single one of you, every person from my family, every one of my friends, every one I don't like - sometimes it is better and more fruitful and sometimes it's not at all. "Love" means something different to all of us, therefore one can't really tell how many times they have been "in love"; it is different with every person and makes you remember a person in your special way, that's why all of us connect something precious with the word "love". Now, if you can clearly tell me what it takes for a relationship between me and another human being to be a "romantic relationship", or whatever you call it, then I could tell you... But you should treat every human being you have a relationship with (and that is every human being you know) with respect, honour and honesty; you shouldn't cheat on anybody (and by cheat I mean being disrespectful, not being honest and to lie. We shouldn't care about someone giving their love to someone else, - what hurts us is that we do not feel respected and that we feel lied to) you meet. Actually, it's like the bible: I do not need it to tell me not to kill and to respect my parents and to treat my neighbours right. My conscience tells me all that. Therefore I do not need the "official status of a relationship" to tell me what is good or bad. As long as I'm honest and respectful it should be good. If it doesn't work that way, then there's something wrong anyway; - forcing yourself into something, just because a "relationship" requires it is always wrong and will make someone very unhappy in the end. If I feel very close to someone, I will care a lot about that person and I will not be sexually interested in other women (for example). It all happens automatically, as long as you are honest and respectful. That's why I can't really answer, nor understand your question. [Edited 3/31/10 8:30am] You must have an old soul... and I dont mean that in a bad way... you seem to have a grasp on things that most 40 year olds dont! I admire that in you... ~~~~~ Oh that voice...incredible....there should be a musical instrument called George Michael... ~~~~~ | |
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paintedlady said: I had my heart broken... I gave my love to the wrong person. That person didn't want what I wanted.
This happens. But because this happened I learned, about me and about how to approach a new love. Having your heart broken doesn't have to be a negative thing, it can make you wiser. For example, I used to date only hot looking men, never a fat guy, I wasn't fat in my twenties and I didn't realize I was being vain and looking for all the wrong things in a person. Getting my heart crushed taught me valuable life lessons in learning how to value content of character in a person above all else. Now I don't care if he's fat, short, tall, bald, or hairy.... I look at what's in his heart. I learned that some men are not worth my time, and the men I would have been attracted to in the past would not stand a chance with me now. I am fat now, and being fat helped me to see how vain people can be. Because I am fat, these past 8 years has shown me much about how people treat others first hand. I can't believe I was such an asshole before. I was just like these vain people I can't stand the sight of now. Now beauty to me means something different, something much deeper... now I am ready for real love and now I know how to find it. I am fat, and I met a man that likes me just the way I am, I don't need to lose weight unless I want to. I have young children... 3 I met a man that is OK with me putting their needs first and is patient enough to understand why. I am not rich, I don't have to go out of my way to impress him, he likes me just the way I am. He is the most beautiful man I have met... I respect him. He is a good man and worth my time. Our relationship is new, but it looks like it can last. If it doesn't then that's OK too. See... it's knowledge like that that makes finding love easier, until then you will have to fumble on through until you learn what you should really be looking for in a mate. Beautiful people can be quite ugly, and can hurt you, so you have to choose carefully who to love... but you must learn to love yourself first. This way who ever you decide to try again with will benefit being with you as well and not be your crutch. [Edited 3/31/10 8:12am] That really was beautiful! ~~~~~ Oh that voice...incredible....there should be a musical instrument called George Michael... ~~~~~ | |
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I've had numerous 'erm...relations'(quote: JustErin), but only two I consider to be of real importance.
The last one was the most intense one, and just ended. When I truly fall for someone, I go all the way and give my everything. I accept the risk of falling on my face and getting hurt. Rather that, than being cynical about love and relationships. Then again, I might just end up a cynical cunt of course | |
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Never been in a relationship...I'm picky with guys. unlucky7 reincarnated | |
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Dave1992 said: vivid said: Bullshit well, you do young Jedi You saying that what I wrote is bullshit? Only joshing old chap. You write beautifully. | |
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Lammastide said: whistle said: i can't give my true answer to this question.
Spill it! no, honestly. it would make look like a right scumbag. everyone's a fruit & nut case | |
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CarrieMpls said: These days I have given up trying to find someone (if I ever really did). Fear of getting hurt is part of it, sure. But mostly the benefits don’t outweigh the risks. I’m happy on my own, I don’t meet men I’m interested in and I really hate “dating”. I’d rather go about my life and do the things I want to do and not worry about it. If I happen to meet someone while I’m going along doing my thing, great. If I don't, that's great too. Great minds think alike! | |
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I've had two long relationships; I have been 'hitched' from the age of 16 to 30.
The end result of the last relationship was that I gave too much up of myself without getting enough back in return; it felt like the 50's version of Invasion Of The Body Snatchers, except it left me soulless, heartless and clueless. I decided I needed some time on my own. Ever since I've experimented with lots of things and even though I would not mind another relationship, no longer do I need it to be a part of my life, as I feel quite comfortable on my own. One thing I read above is that some people said that no relationship is the same. This is true. Not only was every relationship I ever had/attempted different from each other, they also changed; a relationship is all about chemistry and this changes. Constantly. The only constant in relationships is that there is no constant. Sure, some relationships are easier than others, deeper, sexier, funnier; whatever. But what I now want in a relationship is friendship and parts of my life to share with the person I love. Not everything; I would feel smothered and it would drive me up the wall, but someone that puts up with my snoring, my mind not working linear and my moods would already be quite an accomplishment. (grin) >> | |
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tinaz said: That really was beautiful! TY | |
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138... 139?
I'm very serious about my relationships. | |
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I have had a few serious relationships- I was even engaged. All of these ended badly. I've also been in what I THOUGHT were relationships, to find out it was not a mutual devotion.
I always joke that I am "chronically single". More than anything, I want to be with one person in a long-term situation. But the truth is, my experiences have taught me that "love = pain", so I am very guarded. My last relationship was with someone who really cared for & respected me, but I ruined it with my constant suspicion and lack of trust. That taught me a lot; I will try very hard not to apply my past hurt(s) to the next time... "Love Hurts. Your lies, they cut me. Now your words don't mean a thing. I don't give a damn if you ever loved me..." -Cher, "Woman's World" | |
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tinaz said: Dave1992 said: Relationships?
About a couple of thousands? I have a "relationship" to every single one of you, every person from my family, every one of my friends, every one I don't like - sometimes it is better and more fruitful and sometimes it's not at all. "Love" means something different to all of us, therefore one can't really tell how many times they have been "in love"; it is different with every person and makes you remember a person in your special way, that's why all of us connect something precious with the word "love". Now, if you can clearly tell me what it takes for a relationship between me and another human being to be a "romantic relationship", or whatever you call it, then I could tell you... But you should treat every human being you have a relationship with (and that is every human being you know) with respect, honour and honesty; you shouldn't cheat on anybody (and by cheat I mean being disrespectful, not being honest and to lie. We shouldn't care about someone giving their love to someone else, - what hurts us is that we do not feel respected and that we feel lied to) you meet. Actually, it's like the bible: I do not need it to tell me not to kill and to respect my parents and to treat my neighbours right. My conscience tells me all that. Therefore I do not need the "official status of a relationship" to tell me what is good or bad. As long as I'm honest and respectful it should be good. If it doesn't work that way, then there's something wrong anyway; - forcing yourself into something, just because a "relationship" requires it is always wrong and will make someone very unhappy in the end. If I feel very close to someone, I will care a lot about that person and I will not be sexually interested in other women (for example). It all happens automatically, as long as you are honest and respectful. That's why I can't really answer, nor understand your question. [Edited 3/31/10 8:30am] You must have an old soul... and I dont mean that in a bad way... you seem to have a grasp on things that most 40 year olds dont! I admire that in you... I've heard this phrase a couple of times and I really like it. And I think it's appropriate, if I understood its meaning well. He is very special | |
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only two that could qualify as a "relationship"
the rest were just dating. | |
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0
but I almost fell in love once... | |
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JerseyKRS said: only two that could qualify as a "relationship"
the rest were just dating. off topic question: is that your chest? | |
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Many....LOL
but I will always remember the first love, It will never be erased from my memory. MICHAEL JACKSON
R.I.P مايكل جاكسون للأبد 1958 | |
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Zero. | |
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zaza said: I think with every other relationship you are losing/giving away small piece of your heart..that means with another break up you're starting to lose interest in giving your heart to someone else, because you're afraid there's possibility it won't last long again.. Have you ever felt this way and do you have this "barrier" that keeps you away from giving all your best because you fear of another broken heart or not?
I've only had 2 real relationships. And a child of divorced parents deep down I've never expected relationships to last even though it would be nice if they did. I don't see it as 'losing' or 'giving away'. I see it more as sharing your heart. losing or giving away sounds like a piece of you is being taken away. I want all of me! I could never lose heart. I'm too strong of a woman for that. I'm like a kid who always manages to touch a hot stove but never the same one . I don't lose interest in loving someone else because I have a lot of love to give. I believe that if you let yourself be that way you will miss out on someone who just may be what your looking for. I have a fear of love not maintaining itself mutually over a long period of time between two people. I'm seeing someone right now whom I really like but I'm taking it way much slower than what I am accustomed to doing. | |
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Never been in a relationship - and I don't think I'm being picky.
I've twice been head over heels in love with a girl - I mean in those two instances my mind was almost solely focused on hooking up with them - but of course like any other time I've had a crush on some girl, my luck wasn't with me - the first girl - she wasn't looking for a relationship with anyone, the second one hooked up with someone else (a "friend" of hers that came with her) in my 24th birthday party. | |
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Just the one MY COUSIN WORKS IN A PHARMACY AND SHE SAID THEY ENEMA'D PRANCE INTO OBLIVION WITH FENTONILS!! | |
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I have had 3 serious relationships...and I pray this one I am in now is my last. Proud Memaw to Seyhan Olivia Christine ,Zoey Cirilo Jaylee & Ellie Abigail Lillian | |
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Technically one and currently still in this relationship, I'm not counting the very first relationship I had . Now that was a big mistake (I was 14 and stupid and I said yes even though I didn't like him like that ). Anyway, for nearly two years, I've been dateing this dude that I've known since I was 14. I LOVE him!!!! He's really awesome.
But, if we do break up, it's okay, me and him will still be good friends, he means a lot to me. | |
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