independent and unofficial
Prince fan community
Forum jump
Forums > General Discussion > Stupid work jargon
« Previous topic  Next topic »
Page 1 of 3 123>
  New topic   Printable     (Log in to 'subscribe' to this topic)
Author

Tweet     Share

Message
Thread started 03/24/10 2:29pm

Genesia

avatar

Stupid work jargon

I hate it. Hate. It.

"Please manage your calendar so that the 8:00 original timeline is purged."

Seriously...who talks like this?

How about, "Please delete the original meeting from your calendar"?

And when did "learning" become a noun? Ex: "What are our learnings from last season?"

Do they know how stupid they sound?
We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves.
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #1 posted 03/24/10 2:32pm

zaza

And I thought my English is horrible.. lol
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #2 posted 03/24/10 2:35pm

Genesia

avatar

zaza said:

And I thought my English is horrible.. lol


Your English isn't horrible by any stretch of the imagination.

In almost every case, this awful English is the result of people trying to sound smarter than they are. disbelief
We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves.
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #3 posted 03/24/10 2:41pm

zaza

Genesia said:

zaza said:

And I thought my English is horrible.. lol


Your English isn't horrible by any stretch of the imagination.

In almost every case, this awful English is the result of people trying to sound smarter than they are. disbelief

It's just like when people use phrases like "de facto" neutral
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #4 posted 03/24/10 2:46pm

erik319

avatar

zaza said:

And I thought my English is horrible.. lol


it is.

biggrin
blah blah blah
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #5 posted 03/24/10 2:48pm

zaza

erik319 said:

zaza said:

And I thought my English is horrible.. lol


it is.

biggrin

..says someone who spelt Grenada wrong lol
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #6 posted 03/24/10 2:49pm

erik319

avatar

Genesia said:

I hate it. Hate. It.

"Please manage your calendar so that the 8:00 original timeline is purged."

Seriously...who talks like this?

How about, "Please delete the original meeting from your calendar"?

And when did "learning" become a noun? Ex: "What are our learnings from last season?"

Do they know how stupid they sound?


When I worked at a company called Time Computers (horrible place), we used to play Bullshit Bingo.

We'd write down a list of words that nobody would say in real life. You know, pointless non-words (eg "basically") or things that make people think they're clever and important ("Incredulous"), without actually knowing how to fit them into a coherent sentence...

Then we'd tick them off when the managers used them in meetings. Always made dull meetings go much faster wink
blah blah blah
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #7 posted 03/24/10 2:50pm

Genesia

avatar

erik319 said:

Genesia said:

I hate it. Hate. It.

"Please manage your calendar so that the 8:00 original timeline is purged."

Seriously...who talks like this?

How about, "Please delete the original meeting from your calendar"?

And when did "learning" become a noun? Ex: "What are our learnings from last season?"

Do they know how stupid they sound?


When I worked at a company called Time Computers (horrible place), we used to play Bullshit Bingo.

We'd write down a list of words that nobody would say in real life. You know, pointless non-words (eg "basically") or things that make people think they're clever and important ("Incredulous"), without actually knowing how to fit them into a coherent sentence...

Then we'd tick them off when the managers used them in meetings. Always made dull meetings go much faster wink


OMG - I love that idea! lol

I am totally stealing it. lurking
We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves.
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #8 posted 03/24/10 2:50pm

NDRU

avatar

I am subject to the phrase "thinking out of the box" so often that it has come to represent the type of thinking the phrase is supposed to discourage.
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #9 posted 03/24/10 2:51pm

NastradumasKid

zaza said:

Genesia said:



Your English isn't horrible by any stretch of the imagination.

In almost every case, this awful English is the result of people trying to sound smarter than they are. disbelief

It's just like when people use phrases like "de facto" neutral



What exactly does that word mean? I've heard people use that word before, but I doubt it was used correctly.
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #10 posted 03/24/10 2:54pm

Genesia

avatar

NastradumasKid said:

zaza said:


It's just like when people use phrases like "de facto" neutral



What exactly does that word mean? I've heard people use that word before, but I doubt it was used correctly.


It means "being such in effect, though not formally recognized."

For example: A de facto head of a company would be someone who is currently acting as the head of a company, without having actually been named president (or CEO or whatever).
We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves.
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #11 posted 03/24/10 2:55pm

zaza

NastradumasKid said:

zaza said:


It's just like when people use phrases like "de facto" neutral



What exactly does that word mean? I've heard people use that word before, but I doubt it was used correctly.

I'd like to know ACCURATE meaning of "de facto" too smile
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #12 posted 03/24/10 2:55pm

zaza

Genesia said:

NastradumasKid said:




What exactly does that word mean? I've heard people use that word before, but I doubt it was used correctly.


It means "being such in effect, though not formally recognized."

For example: A de facto head of a company would be someone who is currently acting as the head of a company, without having actually been named president (or CEO or whatever).

Thanks. Now I hate that even more lol
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #13 posted 03/24/10 3:01pm

NastradumasKid

Genesia said:

NastradumasKid said:




What exactly does that word mean? I've heard people use that word before, but I doubt it was used correctly.


It means "being such in effect, though not formally recognized."

For example: A de facto head of a company would be someone who is currently acting as the head of a company, without having actually been named president (or CEO or whatever).



hug Thanks!!!! biggrin
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #14 posted 03/26/10 8:32am

Shyra

Genesia said:

NastradumasKid said:




What exactly does that word mean? I've heard people use that word before, but I doubt it was used correctly.


It means "being such in effect, though not formally recognized."

For example: A de facto head of a company would be someone who is currently acting as the head of a company, without having actually been named president (or CEO or whatever).



Go 'head Genesia! The resident geek In a good way. lol
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #15 posted 03/26/10 8:34am

Shyra

NDRU said:

I am subject to the phrase "thinking out of the box" so often that it has come to represent the type of thinking the phrase is supposed to discourage.



THANK YOU!
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #16 posted 03/26/10 8:35am

Genesia

avatar

Okay, this isn't jargon, but...

Yesterday, I overheard a co-worker say...

I'm sorry, I don't shoot kids...

eek








(I work for an apparel company - and we have a line of kids clothing. lol )
We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves.
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #17 posted 03/26/10 8:39am

Shyra

How 'bout ipso facto? That always sounds funny, too.
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #18 posted 03/26/10 8:40am

erik319

avatar

At the end of the day, when push comes to shove, when the chips are down...

RAAAAA!!! STOP TALKING SHITE!

Office speak needs banning before we all turn into smug, smarmy bastards who spout this crap as freely as Old Faithful spouts water.

razz
blah blah blah
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #19 posted 03/26/10 10:35am

CarrieMpls

Ex-Moderator

avatar

Genesia said:

I hate it. Hate. It.

"Please manage your calendar so that the 8:00 original timeline is purged."

Seriously...who talks like this?

How about, "Please delete the original meeting from your calendar"?

And when did "learning" become a noun? Ex: "What are our learnings from last season?"

Do they know how stupid they sound?


Omg. My boss got the little squiggle line under “learnings” in a document and she turned to me and said, “learnings isn’t a word?”. And I laughed and said no. And then she asked what she was supposed to put there instead. neutral When I suggested “lessons” she changed it to “lessons learned”.

And she’s an incredibly smart lady! I think the corporate culture eventually invades your soul and you don’t notice anymore. I’m sure there’s crap that comes outta my mouth at work that never would otherwise.

My list of hated words and phrases includes:
paradigm (any usage, but especially “paradigm shift”)
anything outside the box
at the end of the day
bandwidth
off-line
touch base
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #20 posted 03/26/10 10:51am

thejason

you're fired...worst ever
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #21 posted 03/26/10 1:25pm

ItsOnlyMountai
ns

avatar

anything that's "team" teamplayer, team building, etc. barf
Hey you! Get out on this dance floor!
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #22 posted 03/26/10 1:32pm

Genesia

avatar

ItsOnlyMountains said:

anything that's "team" teamplayer, team building, etc. barf


Oh, man - I hate that crap! disbelief

You know what I hate even more than that stuff at work? When they try to get you to do it outside of work. All week...they've been shilling for this "Earth Hour" bullshit that's happening tomorrow night. They're trying to get 3000 people to sign up (double the number who participated last year).

This political nonsense is a fairly recent development here - and I am not down with it. I keep it on the DL, of course (no sense painting a target on my own back). But I am PTFO that corporate resources are being used for this idiocy.

I'm taking a little satisfaction from the fact that with an hour-and-a-half left in the workday, they aren't even up to the number from last year. woot!

lol
We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves.
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #23 posted 03/26/10 1:49pm

PurpleJedi

avatar

"clustafuck"

I had never heard that expression until I came over to my current company. And in these past 4 years, I've heard it so many times I can't stand it. To make matters worse, mostly every project that turns into a "clustafuck" is a result of our own in-house ineptitude.
brick
By St. Boogar and all the saints at the backside door of Purgatory!
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #24 posted 03/26/10 1:54pm

Genesia

avatar

They actually use the word "fuck?" eek
We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves.
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #25 posted 03/26/10 1:55pm

PurpleJedi

avatar

Genesia said:

They actually use the word "fuck?" eek


nod

It's a small office, but when the OWNER is present, they shorten it to "clusta".

lol
By St. Boogar and all the saints at the backside door of Purgatory!
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #26 posted 03/26/10 1:58pm

tinaz

avatar

What exactly does 'state of the art" mean... I mean, I know WHAT it means but where did this come from? How does it represent top of the line?
~~~~~ Oh that voice...incredible....there should be a musical instrument called George Michael... ~~~~~
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #27 posted 03/27/10 9:22pm

Shyra

CarrieMpls said:

Genesia said:

I hate it. Hate. It.

"Please manage your calendar so that the 8:00 original timeline is purged."

Seriously...who talks like this?

How about, "Please delete the original meeting from your calendar"?

And when did "learning" become a noun? Ex: "What are our learnings from last season?"

Do they know how stupid they sound?


Omg. My boss got the little squiggle line under “learnings” in a document and she turned to me and said, “learnings isn’t a word?”. And I laughed and said no. And then she asked what she was supposed to put there instead. neutral When I suggested “lessons” she changed it to “lessons learned”.

And she’s an incredibly smart lady! I think the corporate culture eventually invades your soul and you don’t notice anymore. I’m sure there’s crap that comes outta my mouth at work that never would otherwise.

My list of hated words and phrases includes:
paradigm (any usage, but especially “paradigm shift”)
anything outside the box
at the end of the day
bandwidth
off-line
touch base



Oh, geez yes! I HATE when someone uses that phrase. I used to work with a woman who couldn't seem to function without using it at least 10 times a day. That and "pencil me in." Yeah, I'll pencil you in alright. Straight up the you-know-what! evillol
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #28 posted 03/27/10 10:06pm

SUPRMAN

avatar

zaza said:

Genesia said:



Your English isn't horrible by any stretch of the imagination.

In almost every case, this awful English is the result of people trying to sound smarter than they are. disbelief

It's just like when people use phrases like "de facto" neutral


Or, the word, 'literally.'
I don't want you to think like me. I just want you to think.
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #29 posted 03/27/10 10:06pm

baroque

i work at a library.
library lingo 24 hours spinning in my head

router=list to find books
tardy=late
shelf read=check your work
are you up?=working at the front desk
where's skeletor?=the master key to the break room.
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Page 1 of 3 123>
  New topic   Printable     (Log in to 'subscribe' to this topic)
« Previous topic  Next topic »
Forums > General Discussion > Stupid work jargon