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PrintableSupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: Lots of people in this situation have pain in their past. Keep in mind you are not responsible for his actions. He needs to take ownership. You can blame the past/parents/situations all you want but at a certain point people have FULL CONTROL of their lives and the choices they make are their own. Do not receive judgment and guilt for whatever he has gone through. I love that you are willing to love him but that might have to also involve leaving him to his own devices and choices if he does not take this opportunity to stay straight. If he chooses to go back to drugs, you can try to help him but don't ruin your life just because he wants to ruin his own.
I wish you the best and a support group would probably be helpful for you   your absolutely right Ive come to terms with this they have taught us how to deal with addicts in familys anonymous... they have told us the same exact things.. they will try to blame everyone but there selves and the only one that can change there life in the long run is them selves.. (they also have told us though no matter what they do you cant give up on them doing so makes it worse because they then feel like life is pointless) Ive stayed strong and listened to those words wisely (i havent given up on him nore will i ever) but my only worry is how to act and help keep him on a sober path.. I'm gonna try my hardest to be the best person in his life and be a good role model and guide him along his life journey like a older sibling should... thank you for your support it means alot for your advice and to know other care! insatiable3: how can i cure my hangover?
whistle: getting drunk is for teenagers. shoot heroin like an adult....  | |
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insatiable3 said: SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: Lots of people in this situation have pain in their past. Keep in mind you are not responsible for his actions. He needs to take ownership. You can blame the past/parents/situations all you want but at a certain point people have FULL CONTROL of their lives and the choices they make are their own. Do not receive judgment and guilt for whatever he has gone through. I love that you are willing to love him but that might have to also involve leaving him to his own devices and choices if he does not take this opportunity to stay straight. If he chooses to go back to drugs, you can try to help him but don't ruin your life just because he wants to ruin his own.
I wish you the best and a support group would probably be helpful for you your absolutely right Ive come to terms with this they have taught us how to deal with addicts in familys anonymous... they have told us the same exact things.. they will try to blame everyone but there selves and the only one that can change there life in the long run is them selves.. (they also have told us though no matter what they do you cant give up on them doing so makes it worse because they then feel like life is pointless) Ive stayed strong and listened to those words wisely (i havent given up on him nore will i ever) but my only worry is how to act and help keep him on a sober path.. I'm gonna try my hardest to be the best person in his life and be a good role model and guide him along his life journey like a older sibling should... thank you for your support it means alot for your advice and to know other care! I have never heard of Families Anonymous; It's a terrific idea. Are most of the member family members of addicts or are some the family members of Alcoholic abusers only? It's really so important to have support when you make big decisions about just how far you will get involved each time he calls on you. I have a cousin who was a RN and lost her liscense not once but twice due to crack addiction. Her son is now adopted by someone else and her daughter,who is now 30 went through years of not wanting to even hear her name mention. It's the ups and downs over and over again that rip you apart. That's were support from other people comes in to make this rollercoaster ride less painful. There came a time when the risk of remaining tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. Anais Nin. | |
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insatiable3 said: TotalANXiousNESS said: I have a lot of experience with this. My story with my brother is very similar almost to the tee as yours.
It sounds like what you have been doing is the best and is actually really admirable. I'm embarrased to say but, I am not as supportive to my brother as you are. You seem very forgiving and that is wonderful. There are things I absolutely have not forgiven and I talk to my brother about once a year and he only lives about 45 minutes from me. I really respect your approach and think that your support, sadly is all you can give him. Keep up the good work! thanks so much your very sweet its nice to talk to someone who has been through what I have. for the longest time I held in a lot of hate for him... he stole so much from me and my parents I couldnt even make a list.. he missed my wedding a year ago because he got sentenced to prision ( that one was the hardest to forgive) and I can tell you Ive been told over a 100 times to my face how he has hated me.. because i didnt support his habbits..I now know seeing him sober the past year it truly was the drugs talking... he has wrote me over 50 letters apologizing for all the things he has done to (some of them I didnt even remember till he reminded me) I truly hope that what he promised to me he keeps.. I have truly felt like ive been the only child for the longest time.. I hope also that you stay strong girly and know that your brother will realize the choices hes made and someday come around and thank you for letting him realize what he has lost... thank you for all of your kind words Thats what I can't forgive is the stuff he did to my parents and grandparents. My own father while he was on his deathbed....thats the one I can't forgive. I do realsize it's a sickness, and I do feel bad for him and still ove him very much. I'm glad you're bigger than me. Sounds like your support is helping him make good choices. I've reached in darkness and come out with treasure
I layed down with love and I woke up with lies Whats it all worth only the heart can measure It's not whats in the mirror but what's left inside | |
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Deadflow3r said: insatiable3 said: your absolutely right Ive come to terms with this they have taught us how to deal with addicts in familys anonymous... they have told us the same exact things.. they will try to blame everyone but there selves and the only one that can change there life in the long run is them selves.. (they also have told us though no matter what they do you cant give up on them doing so makes it worse because they then feel like life is pointless) Ive stayed strong and listened to those words wisely (i havent given up on him nore will i ever) but my only worry is how to act and help keep him on a sober path.. I'm gonna try my hardest to be the best person in his life and be a good role model and guide him along his life journey like a older sibling should... thank you for your support it means alot for your advice and to know other care! I have never heard of Families Anonymous; It's a terrific idea. Are most of the member family members of addicts or are some the family members of Alcoholic abusers only? It's really so important to have support when you make big decisions about just how far you will get involved each time he calls on you. I have a cousin who was a RN and lost her liscense not once but twice due to crack addiction. Her son is now adopted by someone else and her daughter,who is now 30 went through years of not wanting to even hear her name mention. It's the ups and downs over and over again that rip you apart. That's were support from other people comes in to make this rollercoaster ride less painful. yeah families anonymous is for family members of addicts drug and alcohol related its very nice to have support like that there are quite a few groups out here in the chicago suburban area where I live.... insatiable3: how can i cure my hangover?
whistle: getting drunk is for teenagers. shoot heroin like an adult.... | |
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insatiable3 said: missmad said: oh wow I've never been through this
but orgers are here if you want to chat. thanks so much you are welcome hun | |
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kimrachell said: thank you insatiable3: how can i cure my hangover?
whistle: getting drunk is for teenagers. shoot heroin like an adult.... | |
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