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Reply #30 posted 02/01/10 7:33pm

paintedlady

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Vendetta1 said:

paintedlady said:


hug

Great point! When should a mother start her child on birth control if at all?
I am concerned for my daughter... I don't think taking hormones so soon is not good for her body. sigh
I put my daughter on the shot and not pills at 14. Too many of her friends have babies already. i have explained to her that that is not an okay for her to go out and have sex but that i do not want her to become a teen parent because I ain't raising no more fucking kids.
neutral

I understand the need.... but damn, I wish we didn't have to pump our daughters with these drugs so soon.

It terrifies me that my daughter may not want to use condoms if she is on the pill/shots.

I guess I will have my daughter on the pill at 14 too. sigh
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Reply #31 posted 02/01/10 7:42pm

Vendetta1

paintedlady said:

Vendetta1 said:

I put my daughter on the shot and not pills at 14. Too many of her friends have babies already. i have explained to her that that is not an okay for her to go out and have sex but that i do not want her to become a teen parent because I ain't raising no more fucking kids.
neutral

I understand the need.... but damn, I wish we didn't have to pump our daughters with these drugs so soon.

It terrifies me that my daughter may not want to use condoms if she is on the pill/shots.

I guess I will have my daughter on the pill at 14 too. sigh
The only thing I can do is tell her that, if she is going to have sex, she should make sure the boy uses a condom because pregnancy is not her only worry. I would have never thought I would even have to do this now but the girl will barely keep her room clean. She definitely won't care for a child.
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Reply #32 posted 02/01/10 7:55pm

paintedlady

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Vendetta1 said:

paintedlady said:


I understand the need.... but damn, I wish we didn't have to pump our daughters with these drugs so soon.

It terrifies me that my daughter may not want to use condoms if she is on the pill/shots.

I guess I will have my daughter on the pill at 14 too. sigh
The only thing I can do is tell her that, if she is going to have sex, she should make sure the boy uses a condom because pregnancy is not her only worry. I would have never thought I would even have to do this now but the girl will barely keep her room clean. She definitely won't care for a child.


That's great that you are so honest with your daughter.... I know she now sees your wisdom and has avoided much grief because of it. heart You rock! I hope to be the same with my girl.
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Reply #33 posted 02/02/10 6:17am

Mach

ZombieKitten said:

Mach said:




My Mom didn't talk to me about sex ~ nor about my periods

That was not a family trait I wanted to pass down



confused

my mum wanted to take me to the doc to put me on the pill at the age of 18
I cried and cried, since I'd not even been kissed yet! cry


Our oldest daughter's Biounitmom took her and put her on BC before she was ready too ~ it was really hard on Rhianna
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Reply #34 posted 02/02/10 7:04am

Shorty

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paintedlady said:

Shorty said:




well...I would talk to my daughter about the pill by 12 or 13 years old and put her on it no later than 15 years old. Is that in a sense giving the OK? I guess so...but it's just more of an acceptance thing to me.

lol oops...I meant to just edit my last comment, now it looks like I'm talking to myself. ahh..I don't that anyway. lol
[Edited 2/1/10 11:21am]

hug

Great point! When should a mother start her child on birth control if at all?
I am concerned for my daughter... I don't think taking hormones so soon is not good for her body. sigh


I had this conversation recently about a niece of mine...when she was 13 I mentioned the pill to her mom...mom was like OH NO, she is sooo not even close to having sex. I mentioned it again at 14...same thing. This niece talks to me pretty well, I was pretty sure she was not having sex, but knew she was getting close and was probably the last of her friends who hadn't. At 15, I told my niece I would take her if she wanted me to...she was like YES! Feeling like I better not make mom mad I asked her if she would like me to take her and she said yes, to my surprise. It was like she didn't want to or couldn't deal with her little girl having sex so she jumped at the chance for me to do it.
I had this convo with my husband too...he did NOT think it was a good idea, he was concerned about STDs. I spoke with my niece about all that, she seemed very aware of the importance of a condom. My thoughts were, she will use a condom, but she will soon enough get a steady bf and that condom is going to cease to be used. (not right but truth) That's when she will get pregnant. And...she has a steady bf now of 6 months, I am so glad she's on the pill smile

So as I understand the concern for hormones at such a young age, all I can say is do your research on different methods and hormone levels in each. shrug
"not a fan" falloff yeah...ok
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Reply #35 posted 02/02/10 7:08am

Shorty

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Mach said:

ZombieKitten said:




confused

my mum wanted to take me to the doc to put me on the pill at the age of 18
I cried and cried, since I'd not even been kissed yet! cry


Our oldest daughter's Biounitmom took her and put her on BC before she was ready too ~ it was really hard on Rhianna


What is that? I never heard that term b4. I'm curious how this goes down? did she not tell your daughter what was going to happen? Did she tell her I don't care if you don't want to? I mean I am obviously on the side of putting young girls on the pill...but if the girl doesn't want to...then it's a no. Ultimately it's HER choice. (IMO)
"not a fan" falloff yeah...ok
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Reply #36 posted 02/02/10 7:23am

Mach

Shorty said:

Mach said:



Our oldest daughter's Biounitmom took her and put her on BC before she was ready too ~ it was really hard on Rhianna


What is that? I never heard that term b4. I'm curious how this goes down? did she not tell your daughter what was going to happen? Did she tell her I don't care if you don't want to? I mean I am obviously on the side of putting young girls on the pill...but if the girl doesn't want to...then it's a no. Ultimately it's HER choice. (IMO)


Biological (unit) Mom ~ it's a family term/joke

Not really sure how it went down - I was not there nor asked or involved

Rhianna was 14-15 ... I am not sure a shy child who wants nothing but to please her "Mom" who left her, has the ability/mentality to say no and mean it or stand behind it

It was not the pill- it was a under the skin implant confused

I'm not a fan of putting young girls on the pill UNLESS the young girl is having sex and desires to be put on it

in Rhianna's case it was not just about that ... her mother was using the child as a pawn
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Reply #37 posted 02/02/10 7:29am

Shorty

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Mach said:

Shorty said:



What is that? I never heard that term b4. I'm curious how this goes down? did she not tell your daughter what was going to happen? Did she tell her I don't care if you don't want to? I mean I am obviously on the side of putting young girls on the pill...but if the girl doesn't want to...then it's a no. Ultimately it's HER choice. (IMO)


Biological (unit) Mom ~ it's a family term/joke

Not really sure how it went down - I was not there nor asked or involved

Rhianna was 14-15 ... I am not sure a shy child who wants nothing but to please her "Mom" who left her, has the ability/mentality to say no and mean it or stand behind it

It was not the pill- it was a under the skin implant confused

I'm not a fan of putting young girls on the pill UNLESS the young girl is having sex and desires to be put on it

in Rhianna's case it was not just about that ... her mother was using the child as a pawn


Ohh! I see.
I personally wouldn't wait till after she starts having sex, that first of fist couple times might just do the trick....but hey..that's just me smile
That's very sad about Rhianna's situation. sad I hope she's ok despite all that.
"not a fan" falloff yeah...ok
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Reply #38 posted 02/02/10 10:35am

meow85

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BklynBabe said:

pardonme4livin said:

My oldest is 14...he is SO not ready for sex...

He has ADHD and when not on his meds...a real ass-clown lol I love my son like crazy...but he is a real pain lol ...sex for him should be when he is at least 17 or older...who knows....


mine is 9, but I have that same concern with the ADHD....the maturity level is just so far behind, that I feel that even if I explain it, he just won't really get what I am trying to say. I already have a hard time expalining about how to treat adults with respect *bangs head*

I like ass-clown, the word I use sometimes also starts with ass....LOL (but never to his face)

I also can't quite decide if he's gay or just ultra-effeminate so I don't know which talk to have. I'm also thinking he might be a little sado-masochist.

you know what, I might have to slap a chastity belt on his lil pee-pee..... hmmm


Give him each talk, then. Then either way he's prepared.
"A Watcher scoffs at gravity!"
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Reply #39 posted 02/02/10 10:36am

meow85

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Mach said:

meow85 said:


hug I wish more people could have Moms like you.

It was something I had to work hard at ~ I did not have that role modeled by my Mom BUT it was something I wanted to do as a Mother

I had the good luck of having a nurse for a mother, but not everyone does. Good on you for making the effort to educate your kids properly about sex. Too many still don't.
"A Watcher scoffs at gravity!"
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Reply #40 posted 02/02/10 10:38am

meow85

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ZombieKitten said:

Mach said:




My Mom didn't talk to me about sex ~ nor about my periods

That was not a family trait I wanted to pass down



confused

my mum wanted to take me to the doc to put me on the pill at the age of 18
I cried and cried, since I'd not even been kissed yet! cry

sad

That had to have been awkward.

hug
"A Watcher scoffs at gravity!"
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Reply #41 posted 02/02/10 10:42am

meow85

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Shorty said:

Mach said:



Biological (unit) Mom ~ it's a family term/joke

Not really sure how it went down - I was not there nor asked or involved

Rhianna was 14-15 ... I am not sure a shy child who wants nothing but to please her "Mom" who left her, has the ability/mentality to say no and mean it or stand behind it

It was not the pill- it was a under the skin implant confused

I'm not a fan of putting young girls on the pill UNLESS the young girl is having sex and desires to be put on it

in Rhianna's case it was not just about that ... her mother was using the child as a pawn


Ohh! I see.
I personally wouldn't wait till after she starts having sex, that first of fist couple times might just do the trick....but hey..that's just me smile
That's very sad about Rhianna's situation. sad I hope she's ok despite all that.

When I was younger I had a friend who got pregnant her first time. Scared me right off the idea of not using protection.
"A Watcher scoffs at gravity!"
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Reply #42 posted 02/02/10 10:45am

Mach

meow85 said:

Mach said:


It was something I had to work hard at ~ I did not have that role modeled by my Mom BUT it was something I wanted to do as a Mother

I had the good luck of having a nurse for a mother, but not everyone does. Good on you for making the effort to educate your kids properly about sex. Too many still don't.
Thanx

All of ours are over 18 now ...
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Reply #43 posted 02/02/10 10:47am

Mach

meow85 said:

Shorty said:



Ohh! I see.
I personally wouldn't wait till after she starts having sex, that first of fist couple times might just do the trick....but hey..that's just me smile
That's very sad about Rhianna's situation. sad I hope she's ok despite all that.

When I was younger I had a friend who got pregnant her first time. Scared me right off the idea of not using protection.



I got pregnant 2 times, both while on BC lol
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Reply #44 posted 02/02/10 10:51am

meow85

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Mach said:

meow85 said:


When I was younger I had a friend who got pregnant her first time. Scared me right off the idea of not using protection.



I got pregnant 2 times, both while on BC lol

I'm the result of a double protection failure. My mom was on the Pill AND my parents were using condoms and I still showed up. lol

Evidently, women in my family are magically fertile. I always double up with hormonal methods and condoms. I want kids eventually, but good gravy -not today!
"A Watcher scoffs at gravity!"
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Reply #45 posted 02/02/10 11:11am

Mach

meow85 said:

Mach said:




I got pregnant 2 times, both while on BC lol

I'm the result of a double protection failure. My mom was on the Pill AND my parents were using condoms and I still showed up. lol

Evidently, women in my family are magically fertile. I always double up with hormonal methods and condoms. I want kids eventually, but good gravy -not today!



That is exactly how Joshua came about too
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Reply #46 posted 02/02/10 1:39pm

ZombieKitten

meow85 said:

ZombieKitten said:




confused

my mum wanted to take me to the doc to put me on the pill at the age of 18
I cried and cried, since I'd not even been kissed yet! cry

sad

That had to have been awkward.

hug


I refused to go. I went myself when I was ready later.
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Reply #47 posted 02/02/10 1:51pm

ThreadCula

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Mach said:

meow85 said:


I'm the result of a double protection failure. My mom was on the Pill AND my parents were using condoms and I still showed up. lol

Evidently, women in my family are magically fertile. I always double up with hormonal methods and condoms. I want kids eventually, but good gravy -not today!



That is exactly how Joshua came about too



eek
"Nobody makes me bleed my own blood...NOBODY!"
johnart says: "I'm THE shit"
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Reply #48 posted 02/02/10 6:41pm

meow85

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ThreadCula said:

Mach said:




That is exactly how Joshua came about too



eek

It's a scary thought, eh?
"A Watcher scoffs at gravity!"
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Reply #49 posted 02/02/10 6:49pm

Mach

meow85 said:

ThreadCula said:




eek

It's a scary thought, eh?


Part of the reason I got "fixed" right after having Jessica

if the pill didn't cover me ... lol we already had 4 - no need for more
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Reply #50 posted 02/06/10 1:14am

StillGotIt

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Awwwww shit.....just the thought.....shit...I gotta leave this thread.....

I have a 13 yr old girl and a 15 year old boy. I've talked to them until they are on the edge of their comfort zone.....so far nobody is looking in that early intimacy direction, it hasn't been a trend in our family, so far they are both still late bloomers. My girl is thankfully still completely grossed out by the topic to the point of near vomit.

My boy...lets just say that as I talked to him about Sex, I told him the truth, we blushed, laughed and I made sure that I showed him some medical photos so he is not delusional about the stuff that can happen. Nobody wants their kid to go in this direction, but if they do, you dont want them to be stupid.

I am not for putting a girl on chemical BC. She too can learn about condoms.

I plan to bring up the subject again and again (you know...a shorter version so its not awkward when the moment arrives). Its not a one time conversation

and as long as they are young enough to need to ask me if its okay.....it will NOT be okay
[Edited 2/6/10 1:16am]
Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
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Reply #51 posted 02/06/10 5:20am

questionofu

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For me, I took my son to the doctor at 14 and gave him a vasectomy, and told him when he's old enough and has the money, he can reverse it! JUST KIDDING! lol I have a 15 year old young man and a young lady who just turned 11 a few weeks ago. For my son, we have talked about it, and I have encouraged him to be open and not be afraid to ask questions. I have, however, made it clear my opinion that I think he should wait until he is older. Both my husband and I have been honest to a point about our past experiences, but we have been together now for 20 years, and I think that nowadays, that seems to be more rare. Don't get me wrong, everyday is certainly not a bed of roses, but my kids get to see how a couple in love "should" be and see how a family should be, and hopefully that translates into good character/morals. (Please understand this is my opinion, I certainly believe 100% that single parents can do this just as well, I just think this an advantage of long term couples, in a healthy relationship, mind you smile ) My son is a good guy and is sometimes shy, but I always try my best to gear the conversation to his level, that way he can open up, and I let him know he is free to ask questions or come to me without fear of being yelled at or talked down to. He knows I am nosy, but I give him room to do what he needs to do, I let him know that I trust him, and it's up to him to keep my trust. So far, I believe this has worked out, and he is waiting, my God I would hope that he doesn't do anything at 15! My daughter on the other hand I think is too young still for any serious conversations of that nature, but she is aware of it, we have talked in general.
The only LOVE there is, IS the LOVE WE MAKE ~ Prince
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