Do U?

I'm not always 100% sur3 that I hav3 f3lt it during parts of my lif3.




Lately, I do f33l guilt. It's the strangest thing for me. Normally, I felt relief when lying or when doing something wrong, but never guilt. The most I ever felt was guilt at not feeling guilty if that makes any sense



But as of the last year or so, I've started to feel honest, genuine guilt.



U?

SWEET JEEBUS IMAGO!!!

What is the matter??? Why are you regressing into Prince-bonics!!!

R U not f33ling 2 w3ll???



right now I'm trying to live with few regrets...

only if I really don't have anything else to think about, but that's rare

If i've hurt others, it's usually unintentional, but it goes over and over in my head,
The guilt is too much and I always end up making up for it in some way or another.
I just hate seeing people around me upset.

I think I must be crazy.

I feel it, but I don't dwell on it. It's primarily negative so I try and let go of that as quick as I can.

Imago said:

How did I get into Music and More?!


GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!!

embarrassment is much more likely than guilt in my case.

Don't have time to feel guilt. Sometimes feel sorry and pity, but rarely guilt. If I do it is a passing thought, I certainly don't dwell on it.

Not really. I just hold everything inside and wait for the bus to hit me one day. Karma you know.

Yup. Guilt AND shame. I feel them far, far too much. I don't forgive myself for things I should. And my memory is long.

I still feel guilty for stealing a package of lifesavers when I was about 3. My babysitter marched me back down to the store, made me apologize to them and then paid for the roll (cause I'd eaten some). And that's one of the most benign thing I've ever done to feel guilty about.

This morning I'm still dwelling on giving my opinion of a movie I thought was crap and I feel bad I might have hurt a coworker's feelings about it. It's silly right? But I'm still thinking about it.

No matter how much I improve as a person, I still feel like crap thinking about the things I've done that have hurt people. Some are tiny (like the above) some, not so damn tiny.

My conscious is a bad mother effer.

omg...you're finally growin up!

Yep, sure do.
I especially feel it (almost daily now) when my mom sends me yahoo messages telling me how much she misses her (first and only) grandchild and how much she wishes she could hold him. She tells me how jealous she is of my husbands family because they can see him whenever they want. She would not have these feeling if it was not for me living so far away from her.

guilt? what did you do?

If I've done something genuinely foul, then yes I feel real guilt until that thing is appropriately addressed... and I hope that capacity never goes away. But I'm past the days of recreationally kicking my own butt for, say, simply being alive and enjoying it.

CarrieMpls said:

OMG, thats me in a nutshell,,,,esp the last sentence

CarrieMpls said:

that's sooooo me. i still beat myself up over things that i did years ago that the other person has probably either forgotten or never thinks about. it's such a waste of time, and yet i cannot stop doing it.

...and Carrie, you seem like such an agreeable woman. it's hard to imagine you being an a-hole to anyone.
[Edited 11/24/09 5:44am]

whistle said:

Thanks.

But we all make mistakes, myself included.

Yes and no.

There have been times where I felt genuinely guilty for things that I have done...even a little shame.

But in the last couple of years I've done a couple of things that I would never have done in the past and that I really should feel guilty about...but I don't at all and I'm not exactly sure why.

The other day I had a friend ask me about a situation I am in now and asked if I felt any guilt and I had to honestly say, "no". I could tell she was mortified at my answer...but I dunno...something in me has changed and I have more of a "whatever" attitude these days.

I used to feel more guilt than I do now. But the again, sometimes people deserve what they get.

I just had a situation where a supposed "friend" and/or walking buddy YELLED at me during a meeting... I mean in my face yelled. I was asking a mere question, and this person treated me like I was some kind of idiot which I am more often than not!

But the point is that I didn't deserve to be yelled at, particularly in front of people in a professinal context.

At that point, I told her to she needed to get back because I was only asking a question. Then I emailed her, telling her I didn't want to hang-out anymore. This isn't the first time she's yelled at me. It's like she becomes frustrated with me, and then she yells.

I told her I didn't put-up with being yelled at by anyone, particularly when I didn't do anything wrong, but even in ANY situation.

She wrote this snippy email, saying she had the right to express her opinion and she didn't appreciate my judgmental attitude. I responded that what did she think she was doing if not being judmental during that meeting. And I had the right to express my opinion, too. But nobody derseves to be yelled at.

At one point in my life, I would have felt guilty even though this was not my fault. I would have tried to make things better because I don't like having bad blood. But I don't feel guilty at all. I mean, I still respect her as a person. She's very bright and hard-working. But it's obvious we just do not get along--particularly if I annoy her enough she'd yell at me. I don't take that shit from anybody. She's not perfect herself, so I don't know where she gets-off yelling at people.

Suffice to say, I'm still pissed, and I don't feel guilty at all for telling her how I felt and ending our friendship. So there!

I'm only ever guilty of doing something to someone in retaliation. I feel bad about it up until they show no remorse by playing the victim.

deadmansbones said:

^ lol

bboy87 said:

He should feel guilty about using that 3 bullshit.

BTW, I only clicked on this thread because I thought it said:
"Do you feel genuine QUILT?" I was like WTF is this crazy bitch rantin about now? A 1500 word essay on how toilet paper feels against his puckering choco-shoot???

The fact that I would think that was an actual title of one of your threads speaks VOLUMES.
[Edited 11/24/09 9:18am]