New topic
PrintabledaPrettyman said: myfavorite said: fuck him...he said that to keep from having to buy her a new blouse..i hate jasses like that.
i woulda said, if shes so embarrassed, take her azz to the store....  ... 
I will definitely use that next time. Come to think about it, I don't recall her ever saying that he has bought her anything...ever. Never, ever | |
- E-mail - orgNote -  Report post to moderator |
angel345 said: daPrettyman said:
I will definitely use that next time. Come to think about it, I don't recall her ever saying that he has bought her anything...ever. Never, ever Not as a gift, no. I do recall her saying that he has taken her out for her birthday and that was it. **--••--**--••**--••--**--••**--••--**--••**--••-
U 'gon make me shake my doo loose! http://www.twitter.com/nivlekbrad | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
daPrettyman said: He thinks women are inferior to men. Not Prince is it?RIP  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
There's always a slight period of transition, but for the most part if one actually marries in then they are made to feel as part of the family with all the bumps and warts that come with it. It's the dating period where they are an outsiders and get treated like scum if and how they get past all that determines if they're worthy. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
daPrettyman said: The reason I ask this question is because my aunt married a guy about 4 years ago. I never cared for the guy, but have tried to treat the guy with respect and avoid having major conversations with him.
A bit of history about my aunt. She is like a mother to me. She has done for me and helped me in my times of need and I am really overprotective of her. She doesn't have any children. She is in her late 60s and this is her first marriage. A bit of history about the guy she married. This is his 3rd marriage. His first wife (whom he had 3 children with) died early in life. He raised his daughters as a single father. His 2nd marriage only lasted about a year. He says that it didn't last because of her children. This guy came over to my home for a family get together this weekend. He decided to pick an argument with me because he thought I "insulted" his wife. How it started is that I pointed out that my aunt's blouse was torn. It is an old piece of clothing that she has had for YEARS (possibly from the late 80s). In the past I had pointed out to my aunt that the top was worn and she should discard it. Well, she didn't. When she wore it to my home, I pointed it out to her and she said "oh, ok" like she usually does. Well, this man decided that he would try to defend his wife and say something to me. He told me that I hurt her feelings and embarrassed her. I told him that I didn't. I then told him that if her feelings were hurt of if she was embarrassed, she would have told me up front. He then said, "she's not like that and won't say that...you hurt my wife's feelings". Well, you know, I got pissed. I told him that he wasn't familiar enough with my family to know how we interact with each other. I wanted to kick his ass out of my house, but I didn't want to push the issue to upset my aunt. So, I have decided not to say anything to this guy or my aunt. Personally, I don't like the way this guy treats my aunt (as an outsider looking in). He's verbally abusive and treats her as if she has no opinion. How would you guys suggest that I treat this guy? I am to the point where I am really to beat his "walrus looking ass" and call it a day. Where there is no wood, the fire goes out. Proverbs is real good for these kinds of situations. She has to live with him. So she probably isn't going to have anything to say against her husband to you. ...there's nothing wrong with that. She should honor her husband and not contradict him behind his back. Even if you don't like him too well. 
Hopefully, everything will smooth out to a mellow easy relationship...with time and a sense of humor about it. Sounds like you really love your aunt. And that's beautiful. But that's her husband. She must have married him because she loved him, rough edges and all. If she comes to you for help, that's one thing. But if she's not coming to you for help, then maybe it's best to just let the fire go out. And be thankful your not married to him. Or someone like him. LOL. Just try to keep smiling. peace and good luck. [Edited 7/3/09 17:15pm] this is the time of the first fast. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Lotus2unfld said: daPrettyman said: The reason I ask this question is because my aunt married a guy about 4 years ago. I never cared for the guy, but have tried to treat the guy with respect and avoid having major conversations with him.
A bit of history about my aunt. She is like a mother to me. She has done for me and helped me in my times of need and I am really overprotective of her. She doesn't have any children. She is in her late 60s and this is her first marriage. A bit of history about the guy she married. This is his 3rd marriage. His first wife (whom he had 3 children with) died early in life. He raised his daughters as a single father. His 2nd marriage only lasted about a year. He says that it didn't last because of her children. This guy came over to my home for a family get together this weekend. He decided to pick an argument with me because he thought I "insulted" his wife. How it started is that I pointed out that my aunt's blouse was torn. It is an old piece of clothing that she has had for YEARS (possibly from the late 80s). In the past I had pointed out to my aunt that the top was worn and she should discard it. Well, she didn't. When she wore it to my home, I pointed it out to her and she said "oh, ok" like she usually does. Well, this man decided that he would try to defend his wife and say something to me. He told me that I hurt her feelings and embarrassed her. I told him that I didn't. I then told him that if her feelings were hurt of if she was embarrassed, she would have told me up front. He then said, "she's not like that and won't say that...you hurt my wife's feelings". Well, you know, I got pissed. I told him that he wasn't familiar enough with my family to know how we interact with each other. I wanted to kick his ass out of my house, but I didn't want to push the issue to upset my aunt. So, I have decided not to say anything to this guy or my aunt. Personally, I don't like the way this guy treats my aunt (as an outsider looking in). He's verbally abusive and treats her as if she has no opinion. How would you guys suggest that I treat this guy? I am to the point where I am really to beat his "walrus looking ass" and call it a day. Where there is no wood, the fire goes out. Proverbs is real good for these kinds of situations. She has to live with him. So she probably isn't going to have anything to say against her husband to you. ...there's nothing wrong with that. She should honor her husband and not contradict him behind his back. Even if you don't like him too well.
Hopefully, everything will smooth out to a mellow easy relationship...with time and a sense of humor about it. Just try to keep smiling. peace and good luck. Very well said. I tried to say the same thing but I think my point was too harsh  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
heybaby said: Lotus2unfld said: Where there is no wood, the fire goes out. Proverbs is real good for these kinds of situations. She has to live with him. So she probably isn't going to have anything to say against her husband to you. ...there's nothing wrong with that. She should honor her husband and not contradict him behind his back. Even if you don't like him too well.
Hopefully, everything will smooth out to a mellow easy relationship...with time and a sense of humor about it. Just try to keep smiling. peace and good luck. Very well said. I tried to say the same thing but I think my point was too harsh Thank you Your most gracious.this is the time of the first fast. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
| Moderator
|
Let us know what the outcome is  
Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture! REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince "I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
moderatorluv4u said: Let us know what the outcome is
I will definitely do that. **--••--**--••**--••--**--••**--••--**--••**--••-
U 'gon make me shake my doo loose! http://www.twitter.com/nivlekbrad | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
What about marrying ginto a family with a nutbag.....the mother in law is at my place right now...for the night ...or maybe more  ....Im just contemplating sleeping at work   | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
ocean said: What about marrying ginto a family with a nutbag.....the mother in law is at my place right now...for the night ...or maybe more
....Im just contemplating sleeping at work 
mine is hellbent on embarrassing me in public, luckily her son has me so used to that already I don't even blush any more, like EVER. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
ZombieKitten said: ocean said: What about marrying ginto a family with a nutbag.....the mother in law is at my place right now...for the night ...or maybe more
....Im just contemplating sleeping at work
mine is hellbent on embarrassing me in public, luckily her son has me so used to that already I don't even blush any more, like EVER.
My mum just rung me ....said the the monster in law just had a go at Tay ...saying she needs to learn to speak properly and that she sounds like a kiwi  ...mum said well she is half one .....
Im not even home yet and I feel like cutting her head off with a spoon
Oh and she brought her friends with her...(only my mum was home) and she showed them thru the entire house ..including my bedroom ...wtf [Edited 7/3/09 22:30pm] | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
ocean said: ZombieKitten said:
mine is hellbent on embarrassing me in public, luckily her son has me so used to that already I don't even blush any more, like EVER.
My mum just rung me ....said the the monster in law just had a go at Tay ...saying she needs to learn to speak properly and that she sounds like a kiwi ...mum said well she is half one .....
Im not even home yet and I feel like cutting her head off with a spoon
Oh and she brought her friends with her...(only my mum was home) and she showed them thru the entire house ..including my bedroom ...wtf Yikes! lol  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Byron said: ocean said:
My mum just rung me ....said the the monster in law just had a go at Tay ...saying she needs to learn to speak properly and that she sounds like a kiwi ...mum said well she is half one .....
Im not even home yet and I feel like cutting her head off with a spoon
Oh and she brought her friends with her...(only my mum was home) and she showed them thru the entire house ..including my bedroom ...wtf Yikes! lol  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
daPrettyman said: angel345 said: [/b]
Never, ever Not as a gift, no. I do recall her saying that he has taken her out for her birthday and that was it. Wow! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
ocean said: ZombieKitten said:
mine is hellbent on embarrassing me in public, luckily her son has me so used to that already I don't even blush any more, like EVER.
My mum just rung me ....said the the monster in law just had a go at Tay ...saying she needs to learn to speak properly and that she sounds like a kiwi ...mum said well she is half one .....
Im not even home yet and I feel like cutting her head off with a spoon
Oh and she brought her friends with her...(only my mum was home) and she showed them thru the entire house ..including my bedroom ...wtf [Edited 7/3/09 22:30pm] she showed her friends your bedroom? While you were at work? No. That's a problem. That's a boundaries issue and a power play setting up there. and something very different to da Pretty Man's issue. Perhaps she can make other arrangements, find somewhere else to stay? Cuz talking to her ...won't solve that particular issue.... I don't think. this is the time of the first fast. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Lotus2unfld said: ocean said:
My mum just rung me ....said the the monster in law just had a go at Tay ...saying she needs to learn to speak properly and that she sounds like a kiwi ...mum said well she is half one .....
Im not even home yet and I feel like cutting her head off with a spoon
Oh and she brought her friends with her...(only my mum was home) and she showed them thru the entire house ..including my bedroom ...wtf [Edited 7/3/09 22:30pm] she showed her friends your bedroom? While you were at work? No. That's a problem. That's a boundaries issue and a power play setting up there. and something very different to da Pretty Man's issue. Perhaps she can make other arrangements, find somewhere else to stay? Cuz talking to her ...won't solve that particular issue.... I don't think. Nah she has to go. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
heybaby said: Lotus2unfld said: she showed her friends your bedroom? While you were at work? No. That's a problem. That's a boundaries issue and a power play setting up there. and something very different to da Pretty Man's issue. Perhaps she can make other arrangements, find somewhere else to stay? Cuz talking to her ...won't solve that particular issue.... I don't think. Nah she has to go. Yep, what heybaby said 
peace [Edited 7/5/09 8:01am] this is the time of the first fast. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
My siblings and I are pretty much secret about the people we're seeing, and I think that is due to the harsh judgement/expectations that the family places on potential in-laws.
So far, only one made it through to actual marriage, and the family loves him. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
As long as they were cool from the giddy up. And have good intention its cool with me. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Lotus2unfld said: daPrettyman said: The reason I ask this question is because my aunt married a guy about 4 years ago. I never cared for the guy, but have tried to treat the guy with respect and avoid having major conversations with him.
A bit of history about my aunt. She is like a mother to me. She has done for me and helped me in my times of need and I am really overprotective of her. She doesn't have any children. She is in her late 60s and this is her first marriage. A bit of history about the guy she married. This is his 3rd marriage. His first wife (whom he had 3 children with) died early in life. He raised his daughters as a single father. His 2nd marriage only lasted about a year. He says that it didn't last because of her children. This guy came over to my home for a family get together this weekend. He decided to pick an argument with me because he thought I "insulted" his wife. How it started is that I pointed out that my aunt's blouse was torn. It is an old piece of clothing that she has had for YEARS (possibly from the late 80s). In the past I had pointed out to my aunt that the top was worn and she should discard it. Well, she didn't. When she wore it to my home, I pointed it out to her and she said "oh, ok" like she usually does. Well, this man decided that he would try to defend his wife and say something to me. He told me that I hurt her feelings and embarrassed her. I told him that I didn't. I then told him that if her feelings were hurt of if she was embarrassed, she would have told me up front. He then said, "she's not like that and won't say that...you hurt my wife's feelings". Well, you know, I got pissed. I told him that he wasn't familiar enough with my family to know how we interact with each other. I wanted to kick his ass out of my house, but I didn't want to push the issue to upset my aunt. So, I have decided not to say anything to this guy or my aunt. Personally, I don't like the way this guy treats my aunt (as an outsider looking in). He's verbally abusive and treats her as if she has no opinion. How would you guys suggest that I treat this guy? I am to the point where I am really to beat his "walrus looking ass" and call it a day. Where there is no wood, the fire goes out. Proverbs is real good for these kinds of situations. She has to live with him. So she probably isn't going to have anything to say against her husband to you. ...there's nothing wrong with that. She should honor her husband and not contradict him behind his back. Even if you don't like him too well.
Hopefully, everything will smooth out to a mellow easy relationship...with time and a sense of humor about it. Sounds like you really love your aunt. And that's beautiful. But that's her husband. She must have married him because she loved him, rough edges and all. If she comes to you for help, that's one thing. But if she's not coming to you for help, then maybe it's best to just let the fire go out. And be thankful your not married to him. Or someone like him. LOL. Just try to keep smiling. peace and good luck. [Edited 7/3/09 17:15pm] Thanx. I have pretty much taken that approach now. The crazy thing is when we are by ourselves, my aunt will complain about her husband and her children to me and my other family members. We hear her issues with her step-children and husband. She won't talk against them, but she will "analyze" them and say that they "don't have the same core values", or "you are better off than most of his children. They have nothing". **--••--**--••**--••--**--••**--••--**--••**--••-
U 'gon make me shake my doo loose! http://www.twitter.com/nivlekbrad | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
heybaby said: Lotus2unfld said: Where there is no wood, the fire goes out. Proverbs is real good for these kinds of situations. She has to live with him. So she probably isn't going to have anything to say against her husband to you. ...there's nothing wrong with that. She should honor her husband and not contradict him behind his back. Even if you don't like him too well.
Hopefully, everything will smooth out to a mellow easy relationship...with time and a sense of humor about it. Just try to keep smiling. peace and good luck. Very well said. I tried to say the same thing but I think my point was too harsh You weren't harsh, just more succinct. You both are making a very good point and I feel the same way. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
daPrettyman said:[quote] Lotus2unfld said: Where there is no wood, the fire goes out. Proverbs is real good for these kinds of situations. She has to live with him. So she probably isn't going to have anything to say against her husband to you. ...there's nothing wrong with that. She should honor her husband and not contradict him behind his back. Even if you don't like him too well.
Hopefully, everything will smooth out to a mellow easy relationship...with time and a sense of humor about it. Sounds like you really love your aunt. And that's beautiful. But that's her husband. She must have married him because she loved him, rough edges and all. If she comes to you for help, that's one thing. But if she's not coming to you for help, then maybe it's best to just let the fire go out. And be thankful your not married to him. Or someone like him. LOL. Just try to keep smiling. peace and good luck. [Edited 7/3/09 17:15pm] Thanx. I have pretty much taken that approach now. cool. this is the time of the first fast. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Ottensen said: heybaby said: Very well said. I tried to say the same thing but I think my point was too harsh You weren't harsh, just more succinct. You both are making a very good point and I feel the same way.  this is the time of the first fast. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |