vainandy said:

So let me get this straight, if you wouldn't have smelled her you would have sucked his dick.

I'm a writer in training. I have a vivid imagination that is the savior during the bad deed and after.

During--Focus a little bit on what's happening. I think of something sexy like a sensual song or a hotter partner. Or, I think of something random and let my mind expand on it. I daydreamed about making a fruit pizza on one occasion.

After--I use the "soft voice". I am polite, give nice commentary but don't overdo it. I act like I'm gonna call but never ever do. I block the suckers on Yahoo if I've added them and brush them off Myspace and so forth. That's why my little black book does not exist. It's been a bad luck streak for the kid here. (except for my ex. Lord have mercy. )

Sex is a conclusion, not an aim.

ehuffnsd said:

Exactly.

Muse2NOPharaoh said:

Sometimes a female that U'r friendly with throws the cootch U'r way.
Who am I 2 deny? Especially when we had a good friendly relationship.
It just didn't translate romantically.

If I hadn't smelled her where, on my hand or on his dick? Oh believe me, if I hadn't smelled my hand first, I definately would have smelled it on his dick before going down and would have told him to leave immediately. That's happened also when I've gotten down there and smelled shitty smelling balls on someone. I immediately say....NEXT!

Would I have sucked him if I didn't smell anything? Hell yeah, like a motherfucking Hoover vaccuum cleaner. Afterwards, I would have sent him back to his girlfriend and let him continue to be her problem, not mine. Hell, I just want to borrow him for about 20 minutes.
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[Edited 1/6/09 9:09am]

SoulAlive said:

i was soo dissappointed too. he's still in town so i wonder if i should try again.

reneGade20 said:

My experience was the bodily-function odor thing. I was about to do my GF(at the time) from behind, then I started catching a whiff from a certain area - not good. But I sucked it up, and soldiered through it like a pro.

uPtoWnNY said:

uPtoWnNY said:

cuz that how we do things!! I had one that queefed and damned near ran me out the room....but I hung in like a trooper....

reneGade20 said:

That must have been one hell of a queef for you to want to piece out.

KidaDynamite said:

musta been somethin' she ate....

seriously it was pretty nasty....I don't think it was anything like bad hygiene or what have you...I just got her on a bad day, I guess

reneGade20 said:

Wait...are you you talking about a queef or straight up farting?

LadyLuvSexxy said:

Lord H'ammercy

KidaDynamite said:

'twas a queef...if she woulda farted, I woulda got the hell up out of there....there's only so much I can take....

reneGade20 said:

x 100

But you can't control a queef like you can control farting.

KidaDynamite said:

exactly my point...if she woulda farted, that woulda just been her being nasty for nasty's sake....

reneGade20 said:

Okay, I gotchu!

reneGade20 said:

You mean you've never had on of your ladies have fart from her pika-chu? It's just a little air that entered her pika-chu from you making her her overly, um, "lubricous" if you get what I'm saying

But I do suppose one coming from the other end would be gross...can't say THAT's ever happened to me

Ottensen said:

no...I didn't say that...what I said was that one time, the funk was almost enough to end the proceedings.....I know what causes ze` queef....but in the beginning of my sexual journey, one of my "less than knowledgable, yet expert" friends had the crew believing it was because of a lack of size....as in "why is your organ so small?"

....thank gawd I had older sisters who refused to have a dumbass for a brother....

reneGade20 said:

Lord, I'm still stuck on the funk part . What was it, just B.O.? Or maybe she had some bad tacos or Indian food earlier...???

reneGade20 said:

Ohhhhh!
Well, that would have been on the same level as farting and I would've bounced.

uPtoWnNY said:

been there...done that!

BobGeorge909 said:

Damn, what kinda funkdified people are y'all dealing with???

KidaDynamite said:

Man's gotta do what a man's gotta do, even if it's funky in there.

uPtoWnNY said:

I swear, I would probably be labeled as an 'asshole' if I were a dude because I would probably hurt a lot of feelings....if I'm gonna fuck a chick and she smelling a little too ripe, my dick would get limp and I would be out of that house faster than James Brown can say "FUNKAY!!!"

KidaDynamite said:

For real. I like my sex avante garde, but all that's just a lil toooo special even for me

KidaDynamite said:

Y'all don't know what it's like having a penis - it has a mind of its own. Shit, when I'm at attention, in the throes of passion, sweating like a mfer and ready to explode, I can block certain things out and get the job done.

And ladies, ask yourself this. If, during lovemaking, your man tells you, "honey, could you go in the bathroom and hit that thang with the washcloth?", y'all know you'd be pissed.

uPtoWnNY said:

Sorry hun....I do my best to keep my pika-chuu clean and sparkling before anyone comes within 10 feet of it

I do that out of respect for my health, myself, as well as my bed buddy

Lord knows I love funk, but when it comes to sexual experiences, I want all of them to be like Shitney Houston....no funk whatsoever.