It all makes sense as you age...

My grandmother died last Sunday. I didn't spend the $1000 to go to the funeral. She was mean as a snake. She deliberately did not have a will. My mom and her sister have been at each other's throats as much as I can remember. Grandma knew it would be a fucking mess after she was gone. Still a witch even in death. It is a mess!

My little sister said my assanine brothers made fun of a disabled child at the church and also made fun of the older handicaped lady that sang at the wake. My "woe is me" mother and my judgemental assanine brothers...There is so much more that would make sense to this story, but I felt I just needed to share a little bit.

My family, if you are not related, is a front row seat to one of the funniest shows in town. This story right here if written the right way, would make for great comedy.

So glad I didn't buy a ticket.


As the cycle continues...I am trying to never have to return home if I can.

Any writers in the house?

We can seriuosly collaborate...



I would do this on a more comical slant...

You are you, you can step outside the cycle

Thanks guys... I'm not sad about it. I am seriously thinking about writing or something. I mean, away from it, you would really laugh your ass off. Pure dysfunction is where great comedies start anyway.

but I thank you for the hugs!

But who makes fun of a kid in a church setting for being mentally disabled?

How immature! And you are a grown man! My family...

God bless them, that's all I can say.

family dysfunction makes great reading, because we are all curious to see if it's as bad as our own

I have family wacked out like that. To distract ourselves from the pain of losing a loved one, we would sit in the pews of the church and rip on anyone. For example: My brother in law passed and he was a big man. Three hundred plus. I think it was either 8 or 10 of his friends carrying him. Well, as the folks would pass by you would have a few women falling out in front of the casket and such. Normal black funeral stuff. As the women are being helped up from the floor, I noticed that not one of the pallbearers (our friends) were moving to help these women. Then when they noticed that I was looking at them one of them came over and told me what the problem was. They refuse to carry anymore big motherfuckers that day. My brother was enough they said. So they were gaging how much the women weighed and then decided if they had the strength to pick them up. They were ripping on every single person walking by it did not matter. It was truly inappropriate, wrong as hell but I could not help but laugh. That was one of the funniest things I had ever seen. Just crazy. You are not alone so rejoice in the craziness! Just take your family with a grain of salt or a shot of liquor as I do! -

oh, dont get me started.

you are not alone

just remember you are YOU, you are not your family.

well...if it makes you feel better, I got a few relatives I wont be buying a ticket to see them in the box either

I hear all o' y'all!

I am telling you. We need to become writers and make some money writing twisted comedies n shit. Because if you are not related, it is really fricking funny, like the story about big women falling out in the aisle.

Thanks guys. For some reason they don't piss me off anymore.


I cannot wait for my Black boyfriend to meet my mom. She'll go out and buy a bucket of fried chicken, beer, and watermelon and be so proud that she bought it for him. See? You can either be offened or laugh at it all.

My family still rips on me for not sharing their losses from Hurricane Katrina...and is still pissed at me because way back in 1996, instead of staying in New Orleans, close to them, at my dead end job that charged me almost 30% of my take home pay for health insurance, I rejoined the Army so that I could properly provide for my family....

...so my family comedy would be more of a dark, English comedy....