I have a couple of friends in their late 20's and early 30's who are sisters. I met them through a friend of mine and they've been messaging me since to talk about absolutely nothing, just a random how are you type of thing, which I do anyways with tons of people.

But when I meet up with them, I find that I'm doing most of the talking and when I finish a sentence they are just staring at me, and I keep wondering if something is wrong with me, but they always do it and no one else has a problem with me when we talk and they are able to carry a conversation. Then I have to ask them leading questions or open ended questions to get them to talk but then they go all quiet and don't say much or show interest in anything I have to say anymore and I could only say so much so then I go quiet too and feel awkward.

Once I leave them, I get messages from one of them saying she had fun and we should meet up again and they are always saying that, but then I'm wondering why they're saying that if they didn't seem to have fun, or am I reading too much into their mannerisms? Like one of them was talking about going shopping at a few places I suggested, I didn't even offer for us to go together and didn't feel bad cause I knew it would be the same thing over again.

I tried to find out what hobbies they liked, so maybe we can do something fun together, but they're not into anything, according to one of them, and she said she doesn't even like working (in retail) and never did well in school. I got her to talk about it and suggested we try a few things if they're up for it. I don't judge people by what they do or haven't done, but these girls are boring me and I'm getting nothing out of hanging out with them if they're going to stay mute and I have to do all the talking, and then I feel bad afterwards worrying that they didn't have fun. And I have nothing to talk about other than work and school and I feel guilty bringing it up (I'm a very motivated person, but I don't want to feel like I'm rubbing it in, I never felt that way cause most of my friends are the same way) I'm sure they are nice, but why do I feel so awkward around them for how they act? I went to school with their first cousin when we were kids and we had a like-hate thing going on, but now we're just acquaintances who laugh about the past, and nothing more, although she used to be up to bad tricks before. I even wondered if they all talk about me, but probably not. That's unrealistic and paranoia.

What would you do if you were in my situation?
[Edited 8/5/08 10:21am]

I would edit my post



3 times

PANDURITO said:

several typos and grammar shit cause I was spazzing.

Hey, am I funnier than your friends?

It's a difficult situation. Though I wouldn't worry wether they're having fun or not. Looks like they don't have many friends and have problems interacting with people.
I think it will get better as they get more confidence with you. If not, you can always say you're busy until they get the message

How many times have you met with them? Maybe they're still warming up to you and trying to figure out what you're all about...

Aside from that I agree with DanceWme... go drinkin'

RenHoek said:

I've known them for about a year, we've met up at least 20 times which included running into each other at community/religious functions. I think by now things could be better. One of them says I should call her sometime, and I did a few times, but i told her to call me too and she never does. It's odd.
[Edited 8/5/08 10:44am]

PANDURITO said:

lol you ARE :p

They do have a few friends, one of which is my cousin who introduced me to them and it turned out we know some of the same people.

alphastreet said:

I understand how you feel. I too seem to be "chasing" my friends when it comes to getting together. I've been theorizing on a sort of social scale system that concludes there are some people we consider good friends because they stay in touch with us regularly and the feeling is mutual. Then there are others who we never hear from but when the mood strikes they show up and everything is great and we have a blast but we never stay in touch.

Just a theory I'm processing...

Mark em up and sell em off!


Actually, Not sure why you are fretting. I would simply mave them from the friend catagory to the acquaintence catagory and only hang with them in a group of people. Not being rude...it happens in life all the time.

If they call you and want to do something either find a way to be busy or bring a friend that you can talk to.

yeah I see them as acquaintances more than anything but I don't know about how they see me based on how they act.