I was, but I am tired of pursuing something that I now realize is nearly impossible to attain. At this point I would be more than happy to settle for the average.

Average (or simple/quiet) life = happiness (to me it does)

There is no real connection between my "life dream" and my job...my realistic dream has always been to be happy/satisfied...and I am...dreams are wonderful and those that can live them are very lucky indeed...but there's alot to be said about making the most of your reality...
[Edited 7/11/08 5:12am]

if you mean getting selected for the Jaguar race team, but having to settle for the Sunbird race team so Suzie won't feel slighted every race and then watching Suzie fuck up your car????? ...over and over .....and over ...and over????



and all you get is an I'm sorry, I'm innocent, I didn't know, while suzie is ripping the very food from your mouth, cause she didn't know?????


...then yeah, that person has completed the requirement for settling and probably has earned every right to cut the azz and hurt the feelings of every sunbird that tries to crawl in her lap.


However..... ?????

G0d said:

Me too. I wish I could turn that sentence around.

Amaxx said:

.....i like cars ...

Arnotts said:

Life on earth is nothing but a Dream.

We're all actors on a movie screen.

G0d said:

I totally agree, we pick and choose the roles we play in life, and its important to be aware of that. So anyone who is stuck between trying to decide weather to settle or pursue a dream is probably someone who doesn't know what they want yet.
What they really want is approval, not support, and they may never be happy basing what they do in life on other peoples expectations. In other words they are caught up in living the "lie" of the American dream of an average life, and doing what really makes them happy because they are a coward, too afraid to not fit in and not having approval of other average people.

There are two things I absolutely despise, cowards and liars.
Cowards cater to fear, including the fear of failure.
And so often lie about it, blaming others – or the lack of support of others, for their unhappiness.
Liars then cater to lies, deriving a false sense of security that any thing in life is secure or for sure.
So it becomes redundant, they live this so called average life, thinking that if the do they are invincible- knowitn they are not living the truth, and the truth nags at them deep in their souls, so that lash out at other people. When it’s really the role they choose to play out of insecurity, and fear. That person is not living his truth- the person is who is blaming sally for taking the food from his mouth.

Deviance, or the act of being defiant, means that the point of reference for the person who is acting of defiance – is someone else, so this person is still being lead by other people. His or her only point of reference by which to live is others, so they are unsure of their dreams, or making sure their dreams remain dreams, by focusing on how to provoke, or gain attention for others by being defiant. They too in my book are living a life, telling themselves they are different, but all the while constantly comparing themselves to other people. People who are really different don’t make this comparison, and in following their dreams, forge their own paths and become their own authority. Shit, what is some of our greatest inventors and scientist waited for the approval of others, or focused on pissing others off, instead of focusing on what they felt in their heart and minds, with out a script to follow?


So I believe that those who do not pursue their dreams, are both, living a lie and making other people their authority.
In order to do that they have to be so focused on others that they loose themselves in the process.

Now to imply that we need to support of others, to live our dreams, means we need permission or approval, and if we don’t get it, then we suffer and live our lives trying to get that approval by being defiant. At some point we have to become our own authority, our own point of reference and take responsibility for ourselves.

Simply put, I believe we “dream our lives”, the only truth being the truth we create. And when we create that truth, others will support us, most people do not and will not support a liar, or a coward or even a defiant person, it comes through in all that you do.

I dream my life, and when it's not turning out like I expected, I start from were I am and refocus.

My answer might not make any sense.

I vascilate between following very ambitious goals to just trying to survive and figure out what is next. Sometimes the afore mentioned goals could be 'life dreams' (living in near the beach in a warm clime was actually one of the things I desperately wanted when I was a teenager, and that was accomplished--but is it a life's dream? )

A few years back I was just coasting.

Now, I'm very proactively moving in a direction that I want to. I'm taking chances in all directions in my life, and it's thrilling. 2008 has been the most stellar year for me, and it's like I'm waking out of a haze of day-to-day humdrumb so-so existence

Was this just a long way of me saying "no"?

It might be helpful to rephrase what you want to do, make it a "Goal" instead of a "Dream".

I worry about very ambitious people, because survival is what is driving them.
They will use anyone and anything to get to where they want to go. I don't believe you have to ambitious to get were you want to go, you just have to trust in yourself and the powers that be and follow your path, a lot of people who are ambitious, walk all over people and when the make it, its temporary and they fall hard and quickly. What I am trying to say is that ambition is the same as desperation and if you truly believe in yourself and believe you deserve what you desire, you don't need the negative energy of "ambition" to fuel you forward. So relax, continue to be flexible and have faith, the things we really really want in life always come to us.

Imago said:

DevotedPuppy said:

If anyone has ever attained it in life, its not impossible. It may be that you are changing and your values are changing, so you are no longer realistically willing to pursue this goal, and there is nothing wrong with that. Life is a journey and we change, our values change, and our goals change as we grow.

may078 said:

I think one can be ambitious without being Machiavellian about it towards those around you to achieve your ends though.

Jesus, Buddha...Hell, mother Teresa--they were ambitious, attempting the seemingly impossible. Their followers--now some of those folks were both ambitious and possessing an unhealthy dose of jankitynous.

Actually the people you mentioned, their lives, the opportunities and achievements were not derived or attained with any sense of ambition. These people acted on opportunities that simply came to them. They remained who they were and everything and everyone else followed. They walked quietly through life, gently even, and life accommodated them. There was no rush, no push and pull, they simply remained who they were, and were open to all who had a desire to interact with them.

Ambition, is the active purist, and as you just said you attained so much more when coasting along. So you know by now that all you need do is have an idea in mind and you go with the flow and life accomidates you. Most of the time our live's goals and ambitions are achieved in unexpected ways, and if we set out on a course, set in stone as to how we are going to achieve it, then we struggle when things are exactly the way we think they should be. This is resistance, it is negative momentum and because of it we struggle needlessly.

What I am trying to say is "resistance is resistance" any type of resistance builds a negative momentum. While, pushing and shoving you may achieve some goals, but you will be rewarded with more of the same type of energy you expend working against you. So it will be harder and harder to achieve your goals.

Therefore, moving towards your goals with any type of negative momentum, (desperation, anger, ambition, deviance, rutlessness, manipulations, or struggle) will only garner more of the same.

You can achieve your goals with out this type of negative momentum and the end results will be better. First you have to believe, and if you believe in something, you do not struggle against it. Then, once you truly believe in your dreams, they will no longer be "dreams" they will be goals, and having faith in yourself of achieving them, you will be open to all the opportunities that will present themselves. Those opportunities will come to you, and if you are not struggling, you will see them more clearly and be open to them.

Imago said:

[Edited 7/12/08 4:54am]

may078 said:

this better be true cause that is my plan of attack

may078 said:

How do you know that?

Imago said:

I know that about the people that you mentioned by reading the history of their lives. Even with MLK, the highest success came from non-violence- non-reaction after he took his trip to India and adapted the premis of non-resistance. In other words, he refused to add to the negative momentum in his work, and took a more positive stance.

ZombieKitten said:

It is true, when I look at my greatest accomplishment in life, I consider the momentum at the time. Look at our greatest contributers to society, Ben Franklin (who was very regimented by the way) had his greats breakthrough while flying a kite, Einstein says his greatest breakthroughs came while bathing or otherwise enjoying life. Others have found joy, fame and fortune by just doing what they enjoy doing and going with the flow.

Don't get me wrong, I know people who have major success through aggressive actions, but the majority of them are not happy with that success, and continue to struggle and be miserable in that successes. Life is to be enjoyed, it is playful, and it is a dream, you dream your roles, you dream your goals, have fun with it and enjoy.

may078 said:

ok.
But ambition doesn't have to involve self-serving ends. I'm no Spinoza but I woudl think the desire to achieve something, wether altruistic or self-serving involves measures of ambition?

Imago said:

Could be true, more than likely it's just my interpretation of the word ambition vs desire. I know that having the desire to do something and holding that desire in your heart is much more effective in accomplishing goals or dreams, than pressing to try to make it happen.

may078 said:

Gotcha.

From my experience, desire is great but it ends up being wishful aspirations without some real ambition to drive you along. Ambition, though I don't know if this fits the dictionary definition, entails a bit of motivation. And that makes all the difference to me whether my goals are self-serving or altruistic.

I think it just exposes differences in what motivates someone. I for example, am motivated as much by fear as ambition.

My life's dream chewed me up and spit me out. I think I'd like to keep my head down and settle for a little while. After all, it's a pretty fat paycheck and I know the ins & outs of it like the back of my hand.

The only life dream I have is to become a better person with each passing day. My goals to achieve this dream are to have better relationships with friends, family and significant others, to keep working on my house and to have ultimate understanding of who I am. Some days I'm on top of my game with this plan, others days I fall short. I've never wanted a career, like Loverboy I'm workin' for the weekend. I don't want to be rich, I just want to have enough to pay my bills and have a few nice things and take a few nice vacations and be able to afford to have at least 1 child someday. That's all.

Imago said:

...he said "vascilate" "sick: ...

JuliePurplehead said:

...:secret: :whisper: "...she's put together well" ...

Someone give me a life dream..I'm feeling left out

I'm settling right now, trying to still accomplish my life dream

Ocean said:

Excelling is overrated.. fuck it!

I'm settling for average now, so I can afford to follow my dreams later

That was a joke for Kylie.