To my "Shoe Partners"...
(And thanks to Sexxydancer, who sent it to me ):


** Alright ladies, it's that time of year once again!!! I think we need to be reminded of a few things. So my sisters, PLEASE, raise your big toes and repeat after me below....

The Open Toed Shoe Pledge
As a member of the Cute Girl Sisterhood, I pledge to follow the Rules when wearing sandals and other open-toed shoes:

- I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.

- I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free.

- I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.

- I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow.

- I will shave the hairs off my big toe.

- I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there.

- If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back into place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.

- I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good friend Dr. Scholl's if my feet need him.

- I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids' sizes. This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others. No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat and I would hate to take someone down with me as I fall and break my ankle.

- I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell and begin to look like Vienna sausages.

- I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her that her toes are as long as my fingers and no sandal makes creepy feet look good.

- I will promise if I wear flip flops that I will ensure that they actually flip and flop, making the correct noise while walking and I will swear NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.

- I will promise to go to my local nail salon at least once per season and have a real pedicure (they are about $35 and worth EVERY penny).

- I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs of wear... nothing is tackier than dirty white sandals.

Don't keep this to yourself - pass it on to other sisters.

- I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.
yes I will. i always do this.

- I will shave the hairs off my big toe.
my big toe looks uglier without the hair, so I don't think I will be shaving it any time soon

don't wear your plug in the pool

pads or adult diapers in swimsuits don't mix

chocolate1 said:

i hate feet in general, but this is so gross to me. i hate looking down in spring and summer only to see someone's foot spilling out of a shoe in the most disgusting manner possible

pinky swear

Protege said:

I can't stand when people's (women AND men) heels look like they've been running thru flour! OMG! Use lotion, petroleum jelly, or something moisturizing!

chocolate1 said:

chocolate1 said:

soooo gross. it isn't that hard to moisturize

chocolate1 said:

...

chocolate1 said:

... this whole thing is excellent and THE TRUTH! Preach! ..

I get this email EVERY year. Did you get the pictures of cracked heels too?
[Edited 4/17/08 17:42pm]

chocolate1 said:

i have not stopped laughing @ the highlighted..

Be sure to forward the pledge to Bounce-shay and Naoumi.

SCNDLS said:

Naomi Campbell


yeah... chocolate has to add 'must use lotion' on that list ... georgous shoes on and your feet ashy?

Flowerz said:

Yeah, and the hammertoes don't HEP either.

SCNDLS said:

So that's why she's so bad tempered

By the way, I think Im traumatised for life

fisting is not appropriate etiquette for tea parties

horatio said:

Thanks Horatio, we will keep that in mind

SCNDLS said:

Yes, but I didn't feel like going thru the trouble of the cut & paste on here.

JasmineFire said:

Flowerz said: