Why do some guys have a problem saying it? Is it because they are afraid to get hurt? Do you think the person you have hidden feelings for will instantly turn into a bitch the moment you say "I love you"? Obviously the person did something to make you fall in love with her so why hold back feelings? Is it a society thing where expressing emotions makes you look weak somehow?

i never knew what 'the L word' ment.

I thought it was code for lesbian

Of the two times it has been said to me in a romantic relationship, the men said it first.

I'm the scared-y cat. Scared of opening myself up, of being vulnerable, of being rejected, etc. etc. blah blah blah.

it's not just guys! girls can be wusses and hold back feelings too

Thats a swear word!!!

evenstar3 said:

Yeah, I know that, too.

Everytime I've said it, I've always been first.

evenstar3 said:

I know I am!

Because their dad didn't openly and honestly express their love to them or to their mom, in front of them ?

hell I dunno - we all have issues

in my experience is was more the females that held out then males

I fall in love way too fast for most women. So usually when I say it, they're gone the next day.

Other times that I don't say it is when I don't mean in. I just can't. I got a girl real frustrated once when she kept saying she loves me over the phone and asked me to say it back, and I just couldn't The words wouldn't come out.

I've never been the first to say it. But everytime a guy has said it to me I got scared .
My first real boyfriend said it to me within a month of dating. I didnt believe him cuz I felt it was impossible to fall in love with someone so fast

ArielB said:

I used to do that, too. I'm reigning in my emotions though. It's all too painful.

People are just stupid when it comes to "love"..they either use it way too prematurely or not at all...fuck it, if you feel it, say it...it isn't that big of a deal...

Well the lesbian joke is already out of the way, so I guess I'll try to answer for real.

1. Love has been abused by many guys just to get some poon. If you really mean it, it may be best to prove it a bit first so you don't come off as just horny and desperate.
2. If you're not "in love" it is easier to chase other women.
3. Alot of women are afraid of hearing it and will reject a man if it is brought out.

More will probably come to me, but I'm tired.

4. Sometimes you feel like you're in love, then it skeets right out and you would just love some sleep.
[Edited 8/29/07 8:01am]

I used to say it far too hastily. I tread with real precaution these days.

JDInteractive said:

Very good advice, JD.

it could be a million reasons. everybody has some kind of hang up. i've always been the first to say it but only because i'm incapable of holding strong emotions in for long even though i'm extremely frightened of the consequences.

Mars23 said:

1. Love has been abused by many girls to get guys to do some dirty work for them for free. (See, it goes both ways )

When it is said for the first time, to express true feelings, it is a great feeling of release. (can't find the right words to use here).

Lothan said:

I just don't want to get her hopes up and think marriage is on the way.

uPtoWnNY said:

wtf

love doesn't automatically mean marriage.

heybaby said:

I'm slowly learning to let someone show me they love me before I say it first. Most of those people I thought I was in love with showed me that they either weren't worthy of my love or I was in love with the idea of them. It's going to take a hell of a lot for me to say it next time.

evenstar3 said:

For some reason, I keep attracting women who have the 'M'-word on their minds.

Lothan said:

I think that is best.

I say it liberally with freinds.


Rarely say it to family.



And almost never to those I poke.

uPtoWnNY said:

Um, I'm not remotely interested in marrying anyone. And knowing you from your posts, you put it upfront that you are not the marrying kind.

I love you...

Byron said:

I love you, too.

Lothan said:

and why would marriage be assumed just from saying 'i love you'? thats a bit of a jump i think

Imago said:

Is that why I never hear it from you?

heybaby said:

Yeah.

And as in my exp. its the DUDES who wanna jump into marriage.

I love me...