People seem to say this a lot when someone else dares to be critical or comment negatively on behaviors/attitude.

I have many very beautiful friends and they are definitely no "threat" to me--they are dear to my heart because they know they are far more than just their looks and they have intentionally cultivated loving, strong, intelligent personalities in addition to the physical hotness. The men or women (of any level of attractiveness) who refuse to make an effort to make life about more than the superficial are the ones whom I dislike--and in no way am I jealous. They are the last sort of person I want to emulate or have in my life.

I think it's an easy cop-out, to accuse others of jealousy without looking at it a little more deeply.

Is it possible to dislike someone "pretty" and not be jealous? Or is all negative feeling "jealousy", in your opinion? What about disliking "average" looking people--is that jealousy, too?
[Edited 9/7/06 17:32pm]

Of course it's impossible to dislike someone pretty and not be jealous.

Seriously though, you're just asking rhetorical questions here. The real question is: how often is dislike towards good-looking people caused by jealousy and how often is it caused by other things? My answer would be that jealousy often plays a big part. Things that usually wouldn't seem provocative suddenly become provocative because the person in question is pretty and because jealousy is lurking in the background. That said, there's no denying that pretty people often dismiss valid criticism as jealousy. Of course that happens too. And yes, it can be annoying.

Since this obviously developed for the Paris Hilton thread.....

No, I don't think ALL hatred stems from jealousy, but a lot of it does.

I can't really answer to well though, since I don't have an ounce of hatred in my body.

Hate is Hate is Hate, no matter where it comes from, and the reason doesn't matter much. I prefer to Love everyone.

luv4all7 said:

I'm not talking about "hate", though, I'm talking about criticizing someone even the slightest bit for what they're doing/saying. So, you don't dislike anyone for what they do or say?

luv4all7 said:

Even me?

ThreadCula said:

AnotherLoverToo said:

I dis like child molester/abusers/haters yanno people like that, but I even try to find the positivity and beauty in even those people.

I'm sure you guys think I'm just saying that, that's cool, but there are a handful of people here who know what I'm about, and they know that, that is true.

I actually had been thinking about the topic of "jealousy" for awhile, the Paris thread just reminded me that I'd meant to post about it.

Just sayin' that there are often valid reasons to dislike people--and that it's easy to accuse people of "just being jealous" rather than to look and see if there's any truth to the criticism.

I get my fair share of attention, I'm not ugly, but when someone is critical of me I look at what is actually said and try to evaluate it for truth rather than assume that they're just jealous of me. That's a bit egotistical, to assume that I'm only being addressed because I'm sooooo great.

Interesting topic! I hope more people comment, but I"ve got to go for a bit!

Don't hate me because I'm sexy!

althom said:

somebody read my mind!

IrresistibleB1tch said:

You think I'm sexy?

althom said:

althom said:

sure! in a skinny Aussie sorta way!

IrresistibleB1tch said:

I'll take that.

althom said:

althom said:

STop IT!!!

jerseykrs said:

jealousy is when you have something that's yours, and you guard it fiercely. for example, you have a boyfriend who flirts with other women. when he does that you feel possessive, or jealous of him.

ENVY is when you want something someone else has. feelings of envy would be where you wish you were as pretty or rich as someone else.

thank you. that is all

XxAxX said:

IrresistibleB1tch said:

i know it's petty but this is one of my pet language peeves.

XxAxX said:

i'm glad i'm not the only grammar nazi around here!

I think that envy can be a part of disliking someone but it rarely is the whole reason behind it. Someone may be beautiful and you can envy their looks because of your own insecurities but not really dislike them. In fact, I think that you can envy certain aspects of yor friends lives while still loving them as your friend.
And then someone can be beautiful and a complete and total asshole and then you can eny their looks and dislike them at the same time.

Envy does take over people's minds if they let them but it doesn;t have to.


I think that the beautiful rich people get a lot of crap because these are the people who society has deemed better than us and who we are to look up to. Then they do some dumbass shit that us normal people do and it lets us down because we expected more from them.

The defense of "They're just jealous" is weak because no one gets into a full blown rage over the fact that someone has a better ass, car, or more money than them. People usually dislike others for much more substatial reasons than that.


[Edited 9/7/06 16:27pm]

JasmineFire said:

I agree, except in the case of Paris Hilton I'm not sure if people look up to her and are disappointed as much as just find her annoying. Not because they are jealous but because of her dumb behaviour. It is okay to dislike someone, we dont have to love everyone and it doesn't mean we are jealous because we dont like them.

....
[Edited 9/7/06 16:39pm]

XxAxX said:

Absolutely right, thanks for clarifying that!

Let's start a new trend where we get everyone saying, "she's just ENVIOUS" instead of jealous.

LleeLlee said:

Exactly what I was trying to say, but in a far more succinct and intelligent manner!

Llee

LleeLlee said:

This is true. You can defintely dislike someone just because they're a jerk. I know some average looking people who I don't like. In fact, I think that most people I don't like are average looking. whatever.

I'm still puzzled by the Paris Hilton phenomenon. I mean, Nicki is just as rich is looks a lot like her sister and no one dislikes her.

Paris Hilton doesn't have that much effect on my life and I can't say that I actively dislike her but I am certainly not a fan. It seems like she's never in the news for anything good.

Take Jessica Simpson in comparison to Paris. She's blonde, she's rich, and sometimes she acts like a complete and total airhead. But every time that Jessica is in the news it isn't for something stupid, dangerous, or bad that she;s done. Despite her money, looks, airheaded-ness,and fame Jessica Simpson actually seems like she might be a pretty cool person to know.

Do people hate on Jessica Simpson? Of course, she's a celebrity. But is it anywhere near the amount that people hate on Paris Hilton? Hell no! And the reason why is because Jessica isn't in the news almost everyday for doing something negative.


[Edited 9/7/06 16:52pm]

AnotherLoverToo said:

I put it very simply.

I'm just about to go to bed, im knackered. it's good to see you

LleeLlee said:

Goodnight, oh WiseWoman!

AnotherLoverToo said:

that's so dumb when people do that. it totally makes a mockery out of people like me, who people really ARE jealous of.