The girl I was following didn't know I could see her. She did her laundry and was none the wiser. Why was she alone on a Saturday night? Well, I talked to her landlord and it turns out she just broke up with her boyfriend. After I went through her trash, I discovered some pictures of the couple in better days. Advice on how to move in on this girl? I don't want her to suspect anything.
[Edited 7/9/06 12:12pm]

I dont think its gonna work my friend. She saw u with the Starbucks guy.

Maybe u two can go shopping

ThreadCula said:

So, you've decided to take up stalking!

The decision on whether or not to stalk is an important life choice, and it is important to way up the Pros and Cons of stalking.

The Pros:

• Stalking can make you feel great, akin to a Ninja, and at times mildly aroused (although this borders on "Voyeurism" (see our other publication, "So you've decided to become a Voyeur").
  
  
• Stalking can get other people interested in you.
  
  
• Stalking allows you to get to know the Authorities.
  
  
• Stalking can sometimes lead to sex, although many cases of sexual stalker encounters have been misinterpreted as rape.
  

The Cons:

• Many Stalkers can end up with Restraining Orders.
  
  
• Many Stalkers can end up in Prison, if they fail to stalk politely by obeying the Stalking Rules.
  
  
• Some Stalkers end up scaring, rather than exciting, those that they stalk.
  
  

Remember folks, Stalking's a risky business! Make sure you know the rules before you stalk your friends, family, neighbours and strangers!

Spookymuffin said:

Genius.

kidelrich said:

Thanks - it took for-fucking-ever to write

Spookymuffin said:

But when can I start the heavy-breathing phone calls? Have they gone out of fashion due to call id? Or will she see it as a quaint custom from more chivalrous days?

kidelrich said:

*turns to page 32*

Use payphones, according to the book.

Spookymuffin said:

OK, I really like this girl. *crosses fingers*

kidelrich said:

I think you should also start wearing ankle-length trenchcoats and trilby hats. Perhaps stand outside her appartment door at 3am ringing the doorbell every 2 minutes. She'll find that a real turn-on, and the lack of sleep will make her judgement go a bit so she'll be more willing to sleep with you.

Spookymuffin said:

Dude!! U will get your ass kicked.

...but u would like that wouldnt u?

Spookymuffin said:

I have been watching alot of SVU reruns.

ThreadCula said:

If I was kicked with a spikey boot, and perhaps walked on with stillettos HELL YES.

kidelrich said:

That means absolutely nothing to my British self, I'm afraid.

Spookymuffin said:

http://en.wikipedia.org/w...ctims_Unit

The short answer is that it's about sex crimes.

kidelrich said:

Half of which were probably commited by Brits. We're remarkably apt at being sex criminals and paedophiles. Must be something to do with our nannies spanking us as children.

kidelrich said:

That post was fascinating, thank you.

Spookymuffin said:

I thought you'd understand.

Does anyone think installing closed-circuit cameras in the girl's apartment is gilding the lilly a bit? I want to stalk her right, but I don't want her to think it's my first time stalking, ya know?

kidelrich said:

Binoculars from the building across the street is better. Then a camera with a telescopic lense.

Spookymuffin said:

Got it. As for the camera, should I go with still or video?

kidelrich said:

Video, obviously. Also, chop while you watch.

Just walk up to her and expose yourself.

PurpleJedi said:

"So you've decided to become a Flasher?"...

Spookymuffin said:

You've written a whole series, have you?

kidelrich said:

"So you've decided to become a paedophile?"

Spookymuffin said:

You sent me that one, already.

kidelrich said:

After you ordered it.

Spookymuffin said:

No, you're getting it mixed up with "So you've decided become a nun rapist?". "So you've decided to become a paedophile?" was a Christmas gift, which I really appreciated. Thanks. I opened it in front of my entire family and I think they were even more surprised than I was.