MoonSongs said:

Thank you for the orgnote. I feel such a fool. My prayers and thoughts go out to him.

Hoping for the best, my good man. I'm sure things will be fine.

Get well soon!

Prayers, and good thoughts going your way.

My thoughts are with you!

If posting on the org helps you get well then go for it!

Nathan, you can't imagine how worried i am about this. I'm only glad I can be there. Seeing you with the oxygen tube across your nose and in a hospital bed is like a nightmare to me. Anyway, I'm glad you're doing better today.

Love.

Dayspring said:

I'm really glad I didn't see that. :shudder:

Fauxie said:

i saw him there too and thought, "oh, cool... he must be okay"
so it's good to have it cleared up that in fact things are still iffy
your fellow orgers are wishing you the best gangsta!

I just talked to Nathan and upon telling him Prince's band is rehearsing Dream Factory and Empty Room for the concerts this weekend, he assures me we are going, come hell or high water.

Romera said:

Take care of this boy!!!! We need him around

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

We will. I don't think there is a person closer to being a saint on this earth.

I will be thinking about him. Good luck.

Get well soon

Romera said:

best wishes for a speedy recovery and healing

for Nathan.

Speedy recovery to you

all the best to you, get well soon.

Wow everyone. Thank you for all of your encouragement and prayers.

I haven't felt this scared about my health in a long time and I don't think I've ever felt this "off" before.

If you know me, you know that I'm very health conscious. But you also probably know that I push myself too hard and that when something's wrong, I try to nurse myself instead of seeking help. So going to the emergency room is highly out of character for me.

About 2 weeks ago out of nowhere I experienced the strangest sensation. Out of nowhere, my heart started pounding harder than it ever has before. I felt heat and pressure build, go up the back of my neck and end with a throbbing, blinding headache. The severe pain only lasted 15 minutes max, but my head hurt the entire next day. I've had a persistent sore neck and what feels like high blood pressure ever since.

A pattern started to develop. About every other day, my heart would race, skip beats and tighten. On the off days, I would feel fine. About a week into this, I also developed a sore throat, cough and fever/chills. I've established myself as a patient with a well recommended cardiologist and since then have had an echocardiogram, and EKG and a stress test with this doctor. Normally, I'm used to a high level of activity. I generally have tons of energy and don't require a lot of sleep. I play basketball and swim almost every day of the weak, sometimes hours at a time. But just a simple 10 minute walking test on a treadmill made me weak and faint.

Simple things like doing laundry, getting groceries, cooking and bathing are difficult for me. My heart feels like it's having to work too hard for the amount of activity I'm doing. I just don't feel like myself. The 2 nights before I went into the ER were especially scary. My heart would not calm down while I was in bed trying to sleep. I would get up to watch some TV to see if that helped and I almost passed out just sitting on my couch. I became clammy, dizzy and the left side of my body went numb. I finally fell asleep around 5:30 in the morning and when I got up the next day, I went to the emergency room.

They did the usual blood tests, but also ran a chest x-ray and a CT scan of my head. Everything checked out. They were unable to find anything abnormal on the tests other than some 'extra beats' on the heart monitor. I was in the hospital for 6 hours and they sent me home. Today, I met with my cardiologist and he fitted me with this 24 hour thingamajig that records any heart related information. I'm supposed to keep a journal during the time of any abnormalities and my events during the day. Let me tell you, it's so fucking glamorous and comfortable, that I'm looking into getting one of my own.

Anyway...I'm not sure what to think of feel about all of this just yet. I keep hearing things from all the doctors and nurses about 'anxiety medication' and 'reducing stress' and 'panic attacks'. But I honestly don't think that's what's going on. This feels totally physiological. I can't tell whether to be relieved that they didn't find anything wrong or disappointed that I don't have some answers. It's frustrating as hell. I feel like a prisoner to my own body and totally unable to do the things that come naturally to me.

I go into my cardiologist to turn in my heart monitor and also to my family doctor for a checkup. I had a good night's sleep last night and that helped a lot. I also know to avoid any physical work, exercise or sexual activity. When I try, the pounding headache returns and I'm fucked for at least a day.

The reason I've posted on the org and will continue to, is that it's one of the no-brainer activities I can do that requires no effort and it chills me out. As far as the concerts in Vegas...we'll see I guess. I was originally going to go on a roadtrip for a week, but we're flying now instead. Normally, I'm all about a general admission show, but I might have to claim my spot at a bar stool instead.

Wish me well and thanks for thinking of me.

MoonSongs said:

Thank you my dearest Nikki. It was so nice to have my 4 favorite people in the world there with me, you included. We've been through a lot these past few years, huh? And for you to visit me while your cat was up in a tree...what a friend! The lemonade rocked, btw. I'm accepting donations anytime.

Anx said:

Yeah, I'm very sorry about that. We've been a hot mess lately, haven't we?

You've seen me push myself to my physical limits before, often in poor health. But I'm not doing that this time, as hard as that is for me. I'm actually getting help, having people do things for me and trying to rest. I never thought I'd see the day!

GangstaFam said:

LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! You know it better than anyone. I was going to mention panic attacks but I never had those kind of headaches from them....although all the other symptoms sound familiar.

I had recurring appedicitis for 5 years and the doctors did not diagnose it and my friends all tried to convince me it was all in my head. When I went to the emergency room for the 3rd time the doctors were hesitant to say it was appendicitis because of how many attacks I had.....14 of them. People only have one attack and take the appendix out or die. Wouldn't you know I am so damn special that even my afflictions are unique

Well they did surgery and sure enough it was my appendix. I spent those 5 years and nobody believed me. It was horrible and having a real diagnosis was such peace of mind because it wasn't just me like everyone thought.

When you had the numbness was it just numb or did you actually experience paralysis. Young people sometimes have strokes you know. Baby, keep on top of this and get to the doctor ASAP if it happens again. I'm almost ready to invade and I need you there!!!

GangstaFam said:

Oh just hush and lay back and relax!!!! It's about time you had servants fanning you and feeding you grapes!

The symptoms you describe do sound like "panic attacks" which is just a cutesy name for an attack of intense anxiety. I should know, beacause I have suffered them on occaissions. They feel exactly like you are dieing and convincingly seem to be a genuinely physical problem.

However, it is vitally important that you get all the physical tests to rule out any underlying physical cause. Once that is ruled out you can treat the anxiety (if that's what is is).

About 1 in 10 people suffer anxiety of one form or another so it is a pretty common problem.

I wish you well Nathan.

Imago said:

It's true! Sick people can post too you know! and it's a nice way to pass the time!

Dayspring said:

If I never have to step foot in another hospital, it'll be too soon. And it was hard being on the receiving end this time. It's been 17 years since I've been a hospital patient and you know how hard it was for me to step foot through that door. Thanks for taking such good care of me.