Okay, so I'm talking to the Admiral yesterday right? And we're talking about the usual things, you know hookers, hot chicks, boobies. And I go to the kitchen for just a second and when I came back into the room I WAS ALL ALONE. I did not hear a door slam and the Admiral did not say goodbye. It was like he was never there and I repeat I WAS ALL ALONE.

What do you think this means? That I was talking to my closest friend Admiral one minute and only seconds later Admiral was nowhere in sight and I WAS ALL ALONE?

Weird.
[Edited 5/1/06 7:31am]

Okay, I don't think I set this up properly. The Admiral is my best friend. I have known him nearly all my life. Over the years, I have stood by his side through bouts of severe premature ejaculation. I have helped him come to terms with his seemingly coflicted sexuality. I have joined him in delightful hooker sandwiches. But, last night, only seconds after talking with him it was like he vanished. And his phone has stayed busy since last night.

This is bizarre.

I mean, do people just disappear like that? And when I look at the pictures that we have taken together over the years, I'm now standing by myself. As if the Admiral has been cropped out.

Strange.

Maybe hes at your family's reunion?!

I think it was the voices in your head again....The admiral does not exists....its all the voices in your head talking to you.

CaptainChaos said:

Peel off the wallpaper.
[Edited 4/29/06 17:40pm]

Somebody ate to many paint chips when they were a kid.

It gets weirder.

First, I went to Admiral's house, where I had been 1000 times before, and found an empty lot.

Second, our mutual friends have no recollection of anyone named Admiral. They always say it is just me by myself.

Peculiar.

Schizo

I never noticed this either. On my Porsche, my license plate reads "Capn 1" but on my Ferrari, the license plate reads "Admiral". How could I have not noticed that before?

Mindboggling.

CaptainChaos said:

have you checked your undies? I bet he's there like always.

Maybe he was moved to Fan Gatherings.

Illustrator said:

How something this earthshattering can slip to page 2 is beyond me.

Regardless...

Another strange thing has occurred involving the disappearance of Admiral.

I don't know why I never noticed this before but I have a solid gold name placard on my two luxorious bathrooms in my palatial duplex. On one door, it reads "Captain's Quarters" ("Captain's Log" would have been more appropriate but that is for another time). The other says "Admiral's Quarters". In my house, why would I have an entire bathroom marked for the Admiral. I mean he comes over a lot and I have told him it's okay to bring some hygiene products and his toothbrush for extended stays but a whole bathroom.

Headscratching.

CaptainChaos said:

Just out of curiosity....have you many photos of you and the Admiral standing side by side that you could share with us?

Isn't it weird how you, your girlfriend and the Admiral have never been in a conversation with all three of you?

Deeper down the rabbit hole.

I just looked at the mail I got on Friday. Half of the envelopes were addressed to CaptainChaos, half to Admiral Disorder. Okay a few were addressed to Occupant but the fact remains. Why would the Admiral be getting his mail here?

Curiouser and curiouser.

Maybe the words of Meatloaf will bring you some insight and comfort.

[double check scheduel, phone conversation]

Milty: hey I think it's almost time, rn't there supposed 2 b more ppl here?
Ace: There were 5 ppl who said they would b there, I'm at the lab just waiting to c if they show up.
Milty: Well, they rn't here yet. I'M ALL ALONE!
Ace: Give it time, I'm on my way.
Milty: That's awsome, thanks.

[start to pack up & look 4 guests]

Ace: Oh hey! Haven't seen u in a while, r u going 2 the meeting?
IrresistibleBitch: Yeah, I got the message. R u going too?
Ace: Uh-huh ... Milty is already there just waiting 4 ppl 2 show up.
IrresistibleBitch: That's so exciting, I can't wait!
Ace: (thinks) oh great, shes gonna hit on him too

[enter meeting room]

Milty: Oh, this is so awsome, I'm glad u guy's made it. Everyone meet HereToRockYourWorld, mdriver, and WillyWonka.
Ace: This is so cool, nice 2 c u again.
IrresistibleBitch: Nice 2 meet u guys, whoa I didn't think all these ppl would show up.
Ace: We r pretty active so we keep them busy.
IrresistibleBitch: I hope I can fit in, it sounded like u have a lot planned out.
Milty: Yeah we do! There's a whole list of things u can sign up for, I'm sure Ace has them.
Ace: (thinks) I'm getting dumped with the work again

[continue chitchat]

meeting adjourned

Milty has 2 return 2 work, Ace gets dumped and hangs out with other friends

I think I am discovering truths I was not meant to discover. And "big brother" is watching. How do I know? Why am I getting messages like this when I log on:

Blocked
Sorry, you cannot log into the site because your location has been blocked.
Return to homepage

Is there something about the existence of Admiral that I am not supposed to know? Is it a state secret? Have I broken some extremely clear and unambiguous code?

Mysterious.

CaptainChaos said:

Things are on a 'need to know' basis now. And you don't need to know. That's the way it's gotta be until we get the Admiral back. We know you had something to do with his disappearance. How gullible do you think we are, son?

u2prnce said:

I don't know. I'm scared, man. I'm afraid to put the keys in the ignition. I think I have broken some major rule but I don't know which one. All I know is I really need the Admiral right now.

CaptainChaos said:

is the admiral ur pen0r?

BucketOfBouncyBalls said:

On so many levels that would make sense.

But how the hell did we play racquetball together?

CaptainChaos said:

I think I'll orgnote you that answer

BucketOfBouncyBalls said:

Yeah, probably a good thing there. So many delicate constitutions around here.

I like peanut butter

and I like celery sticks with ranch dressing.

BucketOfBouncyBalls said:

Finally, someone is making sense on this thread. Admiral loved peanut butter and celery.

Where the hell is he?

And just how long will I be blocked? Indefinitely? Can an Orger not seek answers about his best friend and/or possible psychotic doppelganger around here?

CaptainChaos said:

Cap'n, I know a guy who builds bomb shelters with Carlton Fisk. If you want, I can set up a meeting.