I haven't.

But anyway...

CarrieMpls said:

thanks, Carrie! i hope you're having a great weekend!

i don't know anything about BPD.

XxAxX said:

here's some information:

http://en.wikipedia.org/w...y_disorder

Sadly, I have had to deal with two people in my life with this disorder.

My niece, who was so completely out of control that I had to cut contact with her.

And my boyfriend's ex-wife, who calls and threatens things, leaves nasty messages about me and my child, and gets into physical confrontations about as regularly as I go out to eat sushi.

It's a really bad thing.

gemini13 said:

that has to be rough, especially the ex-wife, since you have very little influence on the situation.

have you found any ways to cope with the accusations, threats and conflict?

IrresistibleB1tch said:

My bf and I have been friends for about 12 years, we met when he had been divorced for over a year. This woman didn't like that we were so close (even though she left him for his best friend and subsequently got pregnant). She came to my work and assaulted me in the parking lot, with her five year old son in the car. I didn't press any charges because I felt sorry for her somehow.

I just ignore her now, and feel pity mostly. She has had a rough childhood, really rough, so I just think that she's not really mad at "Me", she's mad at herself. I save the messages, sure, but would I ever do anything with them? Probably not. Unless, that is, she confronted me again.

IrresistibleB1tch said:

I am diagnosed, and learned to live with it, live is beatifull all over again (and staying that way)
We'll mail ok?!

gemini13 said:

It can turn to good though, but that is all in the hands and heart of the person having the illness (and the help of the professionals )
[Edited 2/4/06 7:58am]

gemini13 said:

i'm amazed at how you've been able to develop compassion for her - that's probably the hardest part in living with people who suffer from BPD. hats off to you, G13!

Whateva said:

thank you so much - i look forward to talking with you! and much respect for tackling the disease and seeing life as beautiful again!

I personally have only encountered one person I'd sincerely consider to be diagnosible, but my wife works with them almost daily. And I like to read the research from time to time.

From what I've seen, the most important part is establishing very supportive, but solidly self-sustaining, boundaries with them. Let them know you're in their corner, but that you will not enable unhealthy behavior and that you cannot allow the attention they often require to overwhelm you.

The other thing is simply to watch so they don't hurt themselves. Borderline survivors feel everything so deeply; but while that sometimes manifests in threats, aggression, etc. (usually mostly theatrical, from what I've gathered), they most often turn that passion inward, not outward.

For decades, people have treated sufferers a bit more unfairly that those of other disorders. Because usually women endure it, they've long been accused of simply being "drama queens" or "hysterical." Sexist as hell. It's also one of the toughest diagnoses in the DSM because it's considered an innate personality, as opposed to a thinking, disorder. And some professionals won't diagnosis it because of the longterm stigma a client would have to deal with with other therapists and insurance companies. Some even think it's incurable. But there has been some great research on the disorder in recent years and many new strides are being taken in its treatment.

If you want, I can orgnote you some resources from a friend. She did her dissertation on the treatment of BPD and now is a clinician.

XxAxX said:

Check out Fatal Attraction. It's hyperbole, but it's fairly accurate.

Lammastide said:

oh, wow - i've never thought about that, but i think you're right!

thanks for the other information, too, Lammastide - and i'd love to read your friend's dissertation, thanks!

IrresistibleB1tch said:

You're welcome

CinisterCee said:

oh-kay!

Lammastide said:

oh my sounds challenging

Sure askin in the right place...how many in here?

I've worked with 2 clients who have this disorder and it can be soooo daunting.

I'll just add a co-sign to what Lammastide said as I think those are 2 of the most important things to always keep in mind.

endorphin74 said:

there have been some great posts, and i've received some wonderful orgnotes. thank you, all!

I was diagnosed with depression when I was young and my family has some mental illness in it so the doctors have always watched me. The last time I was treated for depression the dr that I work with said depression is curable. She said at least I have not developed a personality disorder- that is much harder to treat. I guess she is right. It was not very comforting at the time but I have thought about it since then and I guess she is right. I am sure there are/were some borderline personalities in the family.
Mental illness is very hard for everyone involved. I think we are just starting to understand the effects of these diseases and realize that they are serious and the ppl with these conditions deserve as much help & respect as someone with cancer or any other illness.
Hope you get the info you are looking for Martina-

shanti0608 said:

thank you, Shanti. dealing with depression is hard, i know. hats off to you for tackling it with grace and compassion.

my sister hasn't been diagnosed, as far as i know anyway, but she said to me a while back that she believes this is what she has. it describes her pretty well, but she has learned to deal with it. i'm actually very proud of her, b/c when depression this severe won't allow most to get out of bed, she somehow (barely) managed to go through technical college, pass, and hold down a part time job. i told her how proud i am of her, but her depression usually won't let her see it like that. it's a struggle sometimes, for both of us.

fantasyislander said:

fantasyislander said:

your sister is so far ahead of the game, just by admitting that her condition might be BPD - that's awesome. keep telling her how proud you are, she needs to hear it, even if she doesn't believe it.

btw, my concern is also about my sister. and the more i read about it, the more i believe that my father may have suffered from it as well.

best of luck to you and your sister!

origmnd said: