My father called me this morning to tell me my grandmother just died. She just fell down during breakfast.

I feel so weird. When my other grandmother died I was very sad, because she was such a good friend. But right now I don't now how to feel. I haven't seen this lady since December. Before that, when my parents were still together, I saw her every weekend. After my parents divorced she completely lost her mind, lost her ability to speak and didn't seem to recognize people. I just felt so sad every time I visited her, and I just stopped seeing her after Christmas.

This week I felt she would die, for no reason, and became very scared and started writing a text about all these fears. When my father called me this morning I just knew what had happened.

She was a strange woman, in the sense that she was always very calm, almost cold even. She only hugged me once in her life, never showed her feelings, or maybe she just didn't have that much feelings to show. She was kind, but always very reserved towards everyone.

It's just so strange, I wish I could feel sad, but right now I'm feeling so many things at the same time, no sadness throughout...

MarieLouise said:

There is no such thing as "right" or "wrong" when it comes to how you feel - You cannot control how you feel, just go with the flow, don't feel like you "should" feel bad or that you "should" be crying or whatever. Deal with it whatever way comes naturally and you'll be fine

Well, you feel what you feel. There are reasons why you feel like you do. Others will be sad or will cry, depending on how their relationship was with that person.

Sorry for your loss.....

sorry to hear of your loss

and ers

I am sorry for your loss. God bless you and your family.

I'm sorry

So sorry to hear this.

Sorry to hear that


When my grandma died, not too long ago...she had surgery to place a new pacemaker in her chest, but it was too strong for her heart. One of her children was helping her dress when she said, "I'm going to live for a long time." After she said that she fell back on the bed and passed.

We feel what we feel. Perhaps within, you feel she somewhat passed when she stopped recongnizing the family, in a sense.

Hang in there. You're very lucky to have known her. I agree with what ROCKNROLLDAVE said about going with the flow.





M

I'm sorry to hear this ML

so sorry

rocknrolldave said:

Very wise words from Dave.

I know how you feel. It can be a weird thing to almost feel pressured to be sad, by both yourself and others. If it isn't there, don't force it. I'm sure you'll take in your grandma's absence eventually and that's probably when the sadness will come. And if it doesn't, that's okay too. As you say, she was emotionally distant and didn't connect with you. That's the way it goes sometimes. I guess it would have been good if we automatically felt close to all those that we are "supposed" to feel close to, but that's just isn't how real life works.

PEACE

Thanks everyone for this kindness...