i had a secret account which no one knew about. im in this deep depression. i dont know how i got here. all i want to do is eat, but then i look at myself and see how fat i am. (my own perception) at work i have a secret personality, i put on my smile and my happy face and they cant see how sad i am, im sure there are people that are worse than me, i mean im not suicidal. i have things. i have great kids, a good husband who loves. a great family. what is it? a chemical imbalance in the brain, stupidity i really dont know. its actually silly. some would look at my life and say what does she have to be depressed about? its not something that has consumed me everyday of my life, it sorta creeped up on me the last couple months.
i know i need to shower and get dressed and go out into the world take a walk, listen to music. but i dont. i sleep a lot more than i should too, my husband says that it gets to be a habit, but i am honestly tired.
why do i wish i had a secret account? because then maybe the truth that some of u may post would not effect me.

It's at times like these that you should wish you had no account. People always joke about how much time they spend here and that it´'s so addictive. Sometimes there's more truth than humour in that. Surfing the net and chatting with people is a weird kind of extroverted introvertedness that can slowly suck the joy out of you. I'd log off to begin with.

Then I'd try to make a few changes. Nothing big or dramatic, just little things like the route you take to work, how much time you spend outdoors/indoors, etc. I'd dump a few habits and take on a few new things. Slowly you're going to see a fresh perspective taking shape in your life.

it'll pass hun...it will i promise...
it did for me...i know what it's like 2 sleep all the time and not be tired...not wanting 2 do anything...been there hun

and believe me it'll pass

TheDuck said:

computer crashed sorry for blank post

TheDuck said:

I know exactly how you feel. I've been putting off talking to someone about my depression for so long. It would be nice be able to talk about the things that bother me with people here on the Org but there will always be someone telling you that you are a loser or you shouldn't post your personal stuff here or something else hurtful when this truth is, this is all some of us have to say what's on our minds. If you want an anonomous account to say what you feel, go ahead. There will be those of us who will listen to you and not judge you.

thanks for all the hugs, i ate a lot of food today and i feel ok.
i have a lot of good things in my life, but sometimes i get in a funk. i dont undersatnd it a prolly never will.

TheDuck said:

~ raises an eyebrow ~

and how do you let the thruths that some others post effect you ?

Mach said:

i guess im over sensitive sometimes.

TheDuck said:

okay nothing wrong with being sensitive ... but again

how do you let the thruths that some others post effect you ?

TheDuck said:

Well, that was easy.

I guess I shouldn't have taken you seriously when you said you were in a deep depression.