Dear 2the9s and Lleena (in no particular order)
When's the wedding?

Regards,
Alf

Dear Leena,

Please know that, no matter where you go, no matter what you do, I will always be here for you in times of your shit threads, to let you know the extent of your shitness. My concern knows no bounds, or indeed any concern.

Warm regards,

Fauxie.

Dear 2the9s,

Please don't post this closed letter on that "Open Letter" thread.

I just wanted to say that you are the greatest! You rock my world and whenever I make fun of you on the Org it is really a sign of my undying love for you!!

Sincerely
Sag10

Dear Fauxie.


Your letter moves something deep within me. I think it is my bowels.


kind regards

Lleena

p.s.you have helped me to come to terms with this thread, as previously I was deeply ashamed. Thankyou.

Here's a closed letter I received from Sag:



Oh my.

Open letter to superspaceboy

Dear Superspaceboy,

Ding ding ding! That is the sound of the cowbell of my loins banging out for the pleasure I received upon listening to your radio show a fortnight ago or so.

You make Kasey Kasem seem like Wolfman Jack.

Sincerely,

2the9s

Lleena said:

You can get another Sample, then.

Lleena said:

Dear Lleena,

I feel that on the one hand I should be flattered by the all the attention you give me and by your apparanetly sincere desire to heal my face, as well as the concern you show for the ongoing state of my paper bag.

But on the other hand, I find it necessary to remind you that, in my view, there is nothing "wrong" with my face. And I can't help but wondering if there isn't some kind of a hidden "dig" at me underneath all this helpful attention.

As for the bag, no indeed a bag over the head would not be the most practical of options were one to have a rash on the face that would warrant a tincture of some kind. But I am not quite sure what this has to do with me, as I just have my own regular face, sans bag.

If my mind changes regarding any of the matters above (e.g. tincture, bag, rash etc), you will be the first to know.

Rashlessly yours,

2the9s

Earlier today I was manhandled and cuffed and then driven in a police car to the station. When I asked what I was being charged with the policeman booking me in said "stealing a bottle of rash tincture with intent." In my defense I pleaded that I had only done this as an act of sheer desperation as i had run out of money and I had a friend who desperately needed the said tincture. He was not having any of it and I will be up before the judge tommorow, and have now acquired a criminal record.

Earlier today I was manhandled and cuffed

Dear 9s.

I am writing to you from my prison cell. Earlier today I was manhandled and cuffed and then driven in a police car to the station. When I asked what I was being charged with the policeman booking me in said "stealing a bottle of rash tincture with intent." In my defense I pleaded that I had only done this as an act of sheer desperation as i had run out of money and I had a friend who desperately needed the said tincture. He was not having any of it and I will be up before the judge tommorow, and have now acquired a criminal record.


None of this is your fault.



angry and seeking revenge.

Lleena

Dear everyone, all these open letters are turning me on.
There's something perfectly sinful about those lickable flaps. .. .


I.. I think I'd like to give you all a great big group hug

Lleena said:

Dear Lleena,

I am not surprised that you have been arrested as I am the one who reported your git-ass to the authorities for felonious transportation of a tincture across state lines.

I am sending Cloudbuster over so you can enjoy a conjugal visit while you are in the Hooscow.

Yours from the outside,

2the9s