When you have made a mistake in your personal life, at work, or just in general do you learn from it? Or do you keep making the same 3 or more of the same mistakes? Most of the more regretful mistakes people make, and the ones that hurt the most are relationship mistakes....Have you done something that may have cost you someone you loved? Did you realize you did this? Have you learned not to do it again or did it become a problem in another relationship? Perhaps you procrastinated when you should have took action and you missed out on an opportunity....Do these mistakes and defeats become a pattern for you? Or do you try to see what went wrong (if anything) and find out the why's and how's to ensure it doesn't happen again?

Through common sense and having messed up many times in the past I don't make many mistakes nowadays....But I have suffered my share of defeats and setbacks, and because I learned from them I came out a better person....Defeat is more instructive than victory....I regret nothing cause it turned me into the person I am. I only really ponder what life would have been like if I had taken certain paths, but no regrets about the one I have chosen. Some refuse or are unable to take anything away from their defeats and mistakes and are doomed to repeat them....And if they don't repeat them they end up doing even worse.

Defeats?

Ha!

some mistakes i learn from, and some i don't. sometimes i just haven't gotten a massive enough lesson. i can be kind of thick with certain things. other things, you don't gotta tell me twice. but i guess i'm doing okay - i've yet to get carted off to jail or the emergency room for some stupid thing i did, so i guess i'm doing SOMEthing okay.

Life lessons

I think 4 or 5 years ago I was making the same mistakes over and over, but there was a turning point and I grew up and I think now I'm not making those mistakes. As I am now I'm much better at learning from unfortunate hardships and from my own errors. It's vital to growing as a person and living a good life.

I totally agree about not regretting anything. It's brought me to here and I'm happy with that.

Anxiety said:

Heh so I won't see you on WGN then?

"Mistakes", yes...

"Defeats"?...That would mean giving up, which I don't do...

Fauxie said:

I think we have all gone through those periods of doing the same dumb stuff...It fustrated me to keep the cycle going, but I was too dense to knock it off...

I think the whole "point" in making mistakes IS to learn from them.

of course, most people - MYSELF INCLUDED - make certain mistakes MORE THAN ONCE over a period of however much time.

I don't mean that people make mistakes "on purpose" to learn something from them, but ultimately, as we are all (IMPERFECT) human beings, we all eventually.. make mistakes.. & DO THINGS WRONG.

[sidebar: I will admit here- it's incorrect (almost to the point of being annoying) for someone to say "I made a mistake" when they actually DID SOMETHING WRONG.. if you find that you are late for work & you run out of the house & leave your keys inside & thus lock yourself out - THAT is a "mistake".
but if you - for whatever reason or motivation - take your keys & scrape them along the car of someone you don't like - that is DOING WRONG, there is NOTHING that suggests or implies "mistake" in that situation. most adults understand the implications of the words they use, which is why many people say "I made a mistake" when they should say "I did wrong". To say "I made a mistake", this "softens" the impact of the wrongdoing. most people even have a "weak", pity-inducing way of saying "I made a mistake".. almost as if saying that will get them off the hook for whatever they did. I hear a lot of "famous people" say "I made a mistake". I make a point to.. call a spade a spade, especially when it's about something I did.

if I thoughtlessly lock my keys in the car or I fall asleep while baking a frozen pizza.. THOSE are examples of making a mistake.

anything I do that has even a SECOND of premeditated thought & does "harm" to others or even to myself, this is NOT a mistake- this is DOING WRONG.]


ideally, when a person makes a mistake
(in the TRUE meaning of the expression)
this is what should happen :

1. the person realizes the mistake they made.
again, because this "bad thing" was not done intentionally, it happens enough that the person is not aware of what they did wrong.

2. the person acknowledges/understands the consequence(s) of the mistake.
sometimes the evidence is known right away or is very obvious, other times not.

3. the person TAKES RESPONSIBILITY for the mistake.
this is probably the MOST IMPORTANT factor in determining whether the person "learns" anything from the mistake made. unless the person takes responsibility for their mistake, it's like the mistake never happened.


so the
realization
of the mistake confirms its existence.
the acknowledgement confirms the realization
&
the acknowledgement should sufficiently motivate the "mistake-maker" to do as much as reasonably possible to avoid REPEATING the same mistake.


it's a little different with "defeats", because there is an implication of an "outside force" (another person or circumstance) that has a noticeable influence on the situation. yet after a "defeat - at least, in terms of competitive sports - there seem to be more things that person can learn from or do "the next time" to avoid another defeat.


defeats, mistakes or wrongdoing :
whatever they may be, however they may come to be
&
regardless of our own extent of involvement therein -
it behooves EACH person to take something positive from the mistakes/wrongdoings done.

read the "signature" (little tag?) below the purple dotted line of all my posts.

Life is all about learning. It does not matter if that learning stems from defeat or victory, all that matters is that you learn.

I have learned SO much from my mistakes and there have been MANY! I am grateful for all of them...gifts that in the long run have made me a better person (short term sucked)...at least I think.
I believe in everything happening for a reason ...even "mistakes", errors in judgement, immaturity...all to make us, if we are inherently good people (which I think most people are), even better. Life is rife with these gifts! Regrets...none...life is to short for "do overs."

Though I would like a do over....

never mind!

Sweeny79 said:

It's about Cokes, too..

Byron said:

and sex...lots of sex.

Sweeny79 said:

I wouldn't know...

Byron said:

suuuuurrrrreeeee you wouldn't

Sweet dreams love!

Sweeny79 said:

Oh, well besides dreams about Carol Burnett, I mean...lol...

Byron said:

you scare me.

mltijchr said:

So many don't learn anything when they make mistakes.....They just blindly stumble into the next situation and question "Why me?" when they re-enact the same situation. I think if you don't have "awareness" then you will not learn your lessons.... I enjoyed yet another of your explanations

Sweeny79 said:

PiscesGlenn said:

Heh It's ok you can have a "do over"