1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.

2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.

3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.

4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.

5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.

6. You watch the Weather Channel.

7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "breakup."

8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.

9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."

10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids

next door won't turn down the stereo.

11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.

12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.

13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.

14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.

15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.

16. You take naps from noon to 6 PM.

17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of

one.

18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset

rather than settle your stomach.

19. If you're a gal, you go to the drug store for ibuprofen and

antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.

20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."

21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.

22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to

drink that much again."

23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.

24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.

25. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that

doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old butt.



BONUS: When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate

her instead of asking "Oh S*$# What Happened?"

19. If you're a gal, you go to the drug store for ibuprofen and

antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.








Smooches;)

Thanks STAX. Another thread that reminds me that I'm old. Great!!! 18 out of 26 aint bad.

Miguel

Welp, guess I got some growing up to do! Whew!

You're only as old as the children you sell.

subhuman09 said:

Or buy...like Angelina...

of course you post this 2 days after my birthday

superspaceboy said:

Exactly.

superspaceboy said:

OH THAT IS SO WRONG!!

Stax said:

I've done almost all of those.

Good thing I've grown up some, I was a little wild back in the day.

gemini13 said:

Shock me with a story, then.

Number23 said:

Dude, my stories could possibly sound as raunchy as glamslam's.

Seriously.

Be careful what you wish for.

this thread just gave me a terrible case of heartburn. i think i need to take off my sock braces and toupee and lay down for a while in my craftmatic.

Anxiety said:

Woohoo!!! I'm still young

Shut up!

Stax said:

I'm 23 and nearly all of these apply to me. Is that bad?

Fauxie said:

yes

gemini13 said:

STORIES??? Here's one about me and the husband on last Valentines Day. Oh wait...i can't post anymore stories. I might get banned. Well, that's what the moderator said. Sorries.

EverSoLesa said:

There, there, it will all be ok. Sorry Ever, I don't know what I was thinking.

MIGUELGOMEZ said:

Stax said:

it's ok honey I know you didn't mean too

As soon as I hit 30, I started getting straggly hair growing out of my shoulders. Plucking it is a pain.

BinaryJustin said:

Why pluck it? it works great as shoulder pads

Fauxie said:

I'm 19 and they do.

meow85 said:

you're old!!!




I'm 31 and none of these apply to me -

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. Don't have any plants. And certainly non that are alive

2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question. Any bed or any other surface is good enough for me

3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge. Don't have anything except 4 days old pizza in my fridge

4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed. I go to bed around 9-10 am these days. Just because I can

5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator. I don't get in elevators often, but no, we still hear Richard Kleiderman here in elevators

6. You watch the Weather Channel. Don't watch TV at all

7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "breakup." Don't have many married friends, but the ones who are, are still married.

8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14. I work when there's work, could be from 100-300 days a year

9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up." Jeans is all I wear

10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids

next door won't turn down the stereo. I live in a building's basement that we turned into an appartement, and umm...I'm still the one doing all the noises. whether from playing music loud, or from watching porn

11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you. My relatives are religious, so no dirdy jokes, no matter what age I am

12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore. We don't have Taco Bell in Israel

13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up. I ride a motorcycle, haven't paid insurance im 2 years

14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers. Don't have a dog. Don't think I'm responsible enough to raise a dog by myself. since I barely have food or any regular schedule

15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt. Don't have a couch

16. You take naps from noon to 6 PM. No, I sleep from noon to 6pm. The rest of the time I'm up

17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of

one. I don't date, but if there's no sex, I'm not paying for the date

18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset

rather than settle your stomach. I usually order pizza around midnight, and chicken wings, and garlic bread and...damn, I'm hungry again

19. If you're a gal, you go to the drug store for ibuprofen and

antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests. Don't have a gal

20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff." I don't like alcohol. never did

21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time. Breakfast? what is that?

22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to

drink that much again." I don't like alcohol, but if I drink, it's probably one sip, just to be polite and not refuse the drink

23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work. I'm home most of the time right now, so no, 90% of the time is Prince.org

24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar. I don't have alcohol at home, unless it's cooking wine, and I don't cook

25. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old butt. (un)fortunatly, none of them apply to me

Most of these don't apply to me, but I take care of myself and therefore feel that I am grown up

meow85 said:

When i was 19 they did to me too

but...

now I'm getting divorced i seem to be regressing, I am actually getting younger


I'm acting like the 19 yearold i never was