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Happy New Year ! some comic relief while the globe spins to 2005 Let's keep this thread active until we're all into the new year.
A little late but anyways: Starting with pacific isles and New Zealand Any Kiwi's on the org? Happy new year ! [Edited 12/31/04 5:25am] You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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couple of minutes to go for the tip of siberia!
Fill those wodka-glasses again boys. Don't think about the cold outside, go and act silly like the next drunken new yorker on times square. Or 2the9s after his third case of ripple Or the three drinkateers : bkw, Xenon (where IS he?) and Althom. One hour to go boys! But first let's hear it for the russkies (too dutch but who cares ) С Новым годом big-ass fireworks picture edit [Edited 12/31/04 4:01am] You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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Meanwhile some comic relief:
Here's bkw on his annual golf-trip. By the looks of it he's still on the beginners course: [Edited 12/31/04 6:10am] You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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I hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
* I do physical labor. * I work at great depths. * I plunge headfirst into everything I do. * I do not get weekends off or public holidays. * I work in a damp environment. * I don't get paid overtime. * I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation. * I work in high temperatures. * My work exposes me to contagious diseases. Signed, The Penis You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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Dear Mr Penis
After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons: * You never work 8 hours straight. * You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods. * You do not always follow the orders of the management team. * You do not stay in your allocated position and often attempt to visit other areas. * You rarely take the initiative; you need to be pressured to start working. * You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift. * You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing proper protective clothing. * You'll retire well before reaching 65. * You're unable to work double shifts. * You sometimes leave your allocated position before the job is done. * You have been seen entering and leaving the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags. Sincerely, The Management You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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Don't you just love the internet ?
You would expect this foto to be doctored.. And for those looking for something to do in the coming half hour : [b][Edited 12/31/04 4:35am] You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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From the Lost Thread Archives : The 2the9s and Lleena show !
2the9s Ultimate Super Duper Computer Store. May I help you? Lleena Thanks. I'm setting up a home office in the den and I'm thinking of buying a computer. 2the9s Mac? Lleena No, the name is Llee. 2the9s Your computer? Lleena I don't own a computer. I want to buy one. 2the9s Mac? Lleena I told you, my name is Llee. 2the9s What about Windows? Lleena Why? Does it get stuffy? 2the9s Do you want a computer with Windows? Lleena I don't know. What do I see when I look out the windows? 2the9s Wallpaper. Lleena Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software. 2the9s Software that runs on Windows? Lleena No, on the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses. You know, run a business. What have you got? 2the9s Office. Lleena Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything? 2the9s I just did. Lleena You just did what? 2the9s Recommended something. Lleena You recommended something? 2the9s Yes. Lleena For my office? 2the9s Yes. Lleena Okay, what did you recommend for my office? 2the9s Office. Lleena Yes, for my office. 2the9s Office for Windows. Lleena I already have an office and it already has windows! Let's say I'm sitting at my computer, and I want to type a proposal. What do I need? 2the9s Word. Lleena If I'm writing a proposal, I'm going to need lots of words. But what program do I load? 2the9s Word. Lleena What word? 2the9s The Word in Office. Lleena The only word in office is office. 2the9s The Word in Office for Windows. Lleena Which word in "office for windows?" 2the9s The Word you get when you click the blue W. Lleena I'm going to click your big W if you don't give me a straight answer. Let's forget about words for a minute. What do I need if I want to watch a movie over the Internet? 2the9s RealOne. Lleena Maybe a real movie, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. But what do I need to watch it? 2the9s RealOne. Lleena If it's a long movie I'll also want to watch reels two, three and four. Can I watch reel four? 2the9s Of course. Lleena Great! With what? 2the9s RealOne. Lleena Okay, so I'm sitting at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do? 2the9s You click the blue 1. Lleena I click the blue one what? 2the9s The blue 1. Lleena Is that different from the blue W? 2the9s Of course it is. The blue 1 is RealOne. The blue W is Word. Lleena What word? 2the9s The Word in Office for Windows. Lleena But there's three words in "office for windows!" 2the9s No, just one. But it's the most popular Word in the world. Lleena It is? 2the9s Yes, although to be fair there aren't many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words. Lleena And that word is the real one? 2the9s No. RealOne has nothing to do with Word. RealOne isn't even part of Office. Lleena Never mind; I don't want to get started with that again. But I also need something for bank accounts, loans, and so on. What do you have to help me track my money? 2the9s Money. Lleena That's right. What do you have? 2the9s Money. Lleena I need money to track my money? 2the9s No, not really. It comes bundled with your computer. Lleena What comes bundled with my computer? 2the9s Money. Lleena Money comes bundled with my computer? 2the9s Exactly. No extra charge. Lleena I get a bundle of money with my computer at no extra charge? How much money do I get? 2the9s Just one copy. Lleena I get a copy of money. Isn't that illegal? 2the9s No. We have a license from Microsoft to make copies of Money. Lleena Microsoft can license you to make money? 2the9s Why not? They own it. Lleena Well, it's great that I'm going to get free money, but I'll still need to track it. Do you have anything for managing your money? 2the9s Managing Your Money? That program disappeared years ago. Lleena Well, what do you sell in its place? 2the9s Money. Lleena You sell money? 2the9s Of course. But if you buy a computer from us, you get it for free. Lleena That's all very wonderful, but I'll be running a business. Do you have any software for, you know, accounting? 2the9s Simply Accounting. Lleena Probably, but it might get a little complicated. 2the9s If you don't want Simply Accounting, you might try M.Y.O.B. Lleena M.Y.O.B.? What does that stand for? 2the9s Mind Your Own Business. Lleena I beg your pardon? 2the9s No, that would be I.B.Y.P. I said M.Y.O.B. Lleena Look, I just need to do some accounting for my home business. You know—Accounting? You do it with money. 2the9s Of course you can do accounting with Money. But you may need more. Lleena More money? 2the9s More than Money. Money can't do everything. Lleena I don't need a sermon! Okay, let's forget about money for the moment. I'm worried that my computer might...what's the word? Crash. And if my computer crashes, what can I use to restore my data? 2the9s GoBack. Lleena Okay. I'm worried about my computer smashing and I need something to restore my data. What do you recommend? 2the9s GoBack. Lleena How many times do I have to repeat myself? 2the9s I've never asked you to repeat yourself. All I said was GoBack. Lleena How can I go back if I haven't even been anywhere? Okay, I'll go back. What do I need to write a proposal? 2the9s Word. Lleena But I'll need lots of words to write a proposal. 2the9s No, you only need one Word-the Word in Office for Windows. Lleena But there's three words in... Oh, never mind! 2the9s Hello? Hello? Customers! Why do they always hang up on me? Oh, well. Ultimate Super Duper Computer Store. May I help you? [Edited 12/31/04 4:49am] You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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Ex-Moderator | |
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CarrieMpls said: which one are you laughing at? Oh crap it's almost ozzie time. screaming BKW BKW WAKE UP: IT'S TIME YOU DRUNKEN BASTARD Happy New Year (part of) Australia ! [Edited 12/31/04 5:00am] You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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Anyone know good aussie jokes? They're busy drinking now
anyway, you ever had a hard time explaining what a sonofabitch is : The only true thing is that a picture is worth a thousand words. In the photo below, the guy on the right is a member of a bomb squad in the middle of deactivating an explosive device. The guy behind him, well, he's a sonofabitch. [Edited 12/31/04 6:08am] You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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AlfofMelmak said: Let's keep this thread active until we're all into the new year.
A little late but anyways: Starting with pacific isles and New Zealand Any Kiwi's on the org? Happy new year ! Wow, already? We've got 16 hours to go. | |
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Time for some quotes:
Steve Martin: "You know 'that look' women get when they want sex? Me neither." Woody Allen: "Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand." Henry Miller: "The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals. It's just that they need more supervision." Metro Radio: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field." Ted Walsh, Horse Racing Commentator: "This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother." Pat Glenn, Weightlifting commentator: "And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!" A new grandstand at Doncaster race course took Brough Scott's breath away: "My word! Look at that magnificent erection!" Chris Tarrant discussing the first "Millionaire" winner, Judith Keppel, on This Morning: "She was practicing fastest finger first by herself in bed last night." [Edited 12/31/04 5:40am] You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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This couldn't be easier. Just follow these simple instructions:
1. Click your mouse just to the left the letter "S" below. 2. Hold down the mouse button and move your mouse down and right until you are to the right of the letter "K". 3. Voila! STOP SCREWING AROUND AND GO TO WORK You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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In now way do I imply that this is the average humour level in australia 5 minutes to go for a lot of australia and russia. Happy new year dudes ! You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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AlfofMelmak said: This couldn't be easier. Just follow these simple instructions:
1. Click your mouse just to the left the letter "S" below. 2. Hold down the mouse button and move your mouse down and right until you are to the right of the letter "K". 3. Voila! STOP SCREWING AROUND AND GO TO WORK One word for you- V-A-C-A-T-I-O- N! [Edited 12/31/04 5:59am] | |
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what the hell are you ooooon? yes SIR! | |
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dawntreader said: what the hell are you ooooon?
a roll Fun with Photoshop: AND THE BEST COMPANY NAME EVER ! [Edited 12/31/04 6:14am] You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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AlfofMelmak said: From the Lost Thread Archives : The 2the9s and Lleena show !
heh heh Llee is really that silly. | |
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As Japan is up for the next new year's hit : another lame japanese invention
And people, i'm (temporarily) off doing stuff plus i think it's not done to include a large part of asia in my merry nonsense in light of the recent event there. So see ya in a couple of hours ! You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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2the9s cant tell his hard drive from his floppy! | |
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HOW Blondes Print
Sorry woman of the org, I just find it funny Where did she bury the rest of him? title edit [Edited 12/31/04 8:13am] [Edited 12/31/04 8:17am] [Edited 12/31/04 16:52pm] You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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Lleena said: 2the9s cant tell his hard drive from his floppy! I'm going to click your big W if you don't give me a straight answer.
That really does sound like Llee. | |
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Ah China has a new year !
except they use a diff calendar well some fireworks none the less And I'm reposting this one cuz i love it ! This couldn't be easier. Just follow these simple instructions: 1. Click your mouse just to the left the number "2" below. 2. Hold down the mouse button and move your mouse down and right until you are to the right of the letter "o". 3. Voila! 2the9s really should buy Lleena a Poncho [Edited 12/31/04 8:23am] You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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2the9s said: Lleena said: 2the9s cant tell his hard drive from his floppy! I'm going to click your big W if you don't give me a straight answer.
That really does sound like Llee. Hello? Hello? Customers! Why do they always hang up on me?
This IS you! | |
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A whole bottle of wine huh | |
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AndGodCreatedMe said: A whole bottle of wine huh spose so ! You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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Gotta go peeps!. Wine is getting to my head, gotta go and eat, kiss 'eva, go to friends and celly till 2005 !
So keep posting them silly pics! You don't scare me; i got kids | |
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AlfofMelmak said: Gotta go peeps!. Wine is getting to my head, gotta go and eat, kiss 'eva, go to friends and celly till 2005 !
So keep posting them silly pics! Have fun and be careful | |
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AlfofMelmak said: Gotta go peeps!. Wine is getting to my head, gotta go and eat, kiss 'eva, go to friends and celly till 2005 !
Have a wondeful new Year Alfie and Eva! | |
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AlfofMelmak said: * You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
* You do not stay in your allocated position and often attempt to visit other areas. * You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift. * You have been seen entering and leaving the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags. | |
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