TD3 said:

Timmy84 said:

Motown always had family ties... that's one of the strangest things about this label. No wonder some keep calling it a "family"...

Smokie is that you?

Smokey and his "family" comments... Jesus. He's one to talk, he fucked some of the "sisters" in the label like Diana and some others...lol what an "incestual" whore.

Timmy84 said:

brooksie said:

I don't know the precise breakdown but it says he had 65 grandchildren in 2009. Notice the birth order of his kids....the outside ones are mixed in w/ Bunny and 'em.

I know Carol has at least 2 and Darell has at least 1...Bunny has 4, Tommy has a least 7 (4=Ducky 2=April 1=outside chick)...not sure how many James has, but he has some young ones too. Chico has about 6, as does Marty.

El...well I suspect slightly fewer kids than China has people, but only slightly fewer!

Wow, Robert DeBarge, Sr. had a beard at the time of his death. He definitely looked like Father Time! Guessing Deathra, Chantel and Alice were his out of wedlock children though it mentioned he had a wife named Barbara DeBarge. Wonder if Barbara was a Sister... and it's also interesting that Robert DeBarge, Sr. was a minister. Am I reading right?! I see Bunny and Mama D failed to mentioned that. Also did Tommy say what religion they were before they joined their uncle's church in Grand Rapids? Seems DeBarge was either just Christian or Pentecostal like the rest of them were? Wow, 65 grandchildren lol

Deathra and Alice are his outside kids born in Detroit to their neighbor....their birth order is shown as it actually is. IOW, MamaD and mystery woman were knocked up at or close to the same time. Tommy says they played w/ Deathra and Alice when young and that MamaD would pick up stuff at garage sells for them. Apparently she's obsessed w/ garage sells. MamaD has a pic in her book of these two girls just as casual as ya please! She doesn't even ID them except by their 1st names!

I'd guess Chantel is by his 2nd wife Barbara. He also had a son by her named Sean, but he died in a car accident years before his father.

Yes Barbara was a Black woman...ALL of his women were. As far as anyone knows, PapaD was never w/ a non Black woman.

About the minister part, I'd never heard of it before. Etterlene said he was not religious at all, so I was a bit surprised to see this. From what I gather, they remained the same Pentacostal faith they'd been in Detroit. I think PapaD must have converted from something (being a Catholic?) at some point, but Tommy presents him as being a big member of Uncle Bill's church once they moved to Grand Rapids.

brooksie said:

Timmy84 said:

Wow, Robert DeBarge, Sr. had a beard at the time of his death. He definitely looked like Father Time! Guessing Deathra, Chantel and Alice were his out of wedlock children though it mentioned he had a wife named Barbara DeBarge. Wonder if Barbara was a Sister... and it's also interesting that Robert DeBarge, Sr. was a minister. Am I reading right?! I see Bunny and Mama D failed to mentioned that. Also did Tommy say what religion they were before they joined their uncle's church in Grand Rapids? Seems DeBarge was either just Christian or Pentecostal like the rest of them were? Wow, 65 grandchildren lol

Deathra and Alice are his outside kids born in Detroit to their neighbor....their birth order is shown as it actually is. IOW, MamaD and mystery woman were knocked up at or close to the same time. Tommy says they played w/ Deathra and Alice when young and that MamaD would pick up stuff at garage sells for them. Apparently she's obsessed w/ garage sells. MamaD has a pic in her book of these two girls just as casual as ya please! She doesn't even ID them except by their 1st names!

I'd guess Chantel is by his 2nd wife Barbara. He also had a son by her named Sean, but he died in a car accident years before his father.

Yes Barbara was a Black woman...ALL of his women were. As far as anyone knows, PapaD was never w/ a non Black woman.

About the minister part, I'd never heard of it before. Etterlene said he was not religious at all, so I was a bit surprised to see this. From what I gather, they remained the same Pentacostal faith they'd been in Detroit. I think PapaD must have converted from something (being a Catholic?) at some point, but Tommy presents him as being a big member of Uncle Bill's church once they moved to Grand Rapids.

Then Robert was converted to the Pentecostal faith then... from what I gathered, despite what he put them through, all the DeBarges loved their daddy.

Timmy84 said:

Hmm looking at Robert DeBarge, Sr.

You know which of the DeBarge children take after their father in the looks department?

Randy, Mark, El, James and Chico (I think Father DeBarge was closer to them...)

The other DeBarges look like lighter skinned Abneys.

For me I'd say Bobby, Bunny, El, and James look most like PapaD in the face...esp around the eybrows and mouth. Everybody in that family has Etterlene's chin tho!

IMHO PapaD has superatomic genes! El's daughter Kennedy is like the spit of him!

brooksie said:

Timmy84 said:

Hmm looking at Robert DeBarge, Sr.

You know which of the DeBarge children take after their father in the looks department?

Randy, Mark, El, James and Chico (I think Father DeBarge was closer to them...)

The other DeBarges look like lighter skinned Abneys.

For me I'd say Bobby, Bunny, El, and James look most like PapaD in the face...esp around the eybrows and mouth. Everybody in that family has Etterlene's chin tho!

IMHO PapaD has superatomic genes! El's daughter Kennedy is like the spit of him!

lol yeah Bobby and Bunny got his eyebrows/mouth for sure. For a minute Bunny was looking like him (Unsung, Lifechangers). Bobby near the end of his life started to look a LOT like his dad!

Timmy84 said:

Then Robert was converted to the Pentecostal faith then... from what I gathered, despite what he put them through, all the DeBarges loved their daddy.

It comes thru w/ them...no matter how angry they are w/ him. One of the most touching things he says in the book is that he admires the courage of both of his parents for being brave enough to come together. Whatever faults his father had, he pursued what he wanted in Etterlene. He chose a Black life when a White one would have been so much easier. Tommy dug that about him.

brooksie said:

Timmy84 said:

Then Robert was converted to the Pentecostal faith then... from what I gathered, despite what he put them through, all the DeBarges loved their daddy.

It comes thru w/ them...no matter how angry they are w/ him. One of the most touching things he says in the book is that he admires the courage of both of his parents for being brave enough to come together. Whatever faults his father had, he pursued what he wanted in Etterlene. He chose a Black life when a White one would have been so much easier. Tommy dug that about him.

Especially at a time when it was frowned upon on both sides.

Timmy84 said:

brooksie said:

It comes thru w/ them...no matter how angry they are w/ him. One of the most touching things he says in the book is that he admires the courage of both of his parents for being brave enough to come together. Whatever faults his father had, he pursued what he wanted in Etterlene. He chose a Black life when a White one would have been so much easier. Tommy dug that about him.

Especially at a time when it was frowned upon on both sides.

PapaD is such a puzzlement. Here he goes thru all this drama to have this woman and these kids against all odds, yet he treats them like they're all on a plantation somewhere? Why not just have a Ward Cleaver life or just bounce like Papa Sylvers did rather than torture and rape them?

He'd make some sense if he were the town drunk or something, but he held down honest jobs and provided for his family.

brooksie said:

Timmy84 said:

Especially at a time when it was frowned upon on both sides.

PapaD is such a puzzlement. Here he goes thru all this drama to have this woman and these kids against all odds, yet he treats them like they're all on a plantation somewhere? Why not just have a Ward Cleaver life or just bounce like Papa Sylvers did rather than torture and rape them?

He'd make some sense if he were the town drunk or something, but he held down honest jobs and provided for his family.

I agree also. Just nutso... like I said earlier.

I heard rumors Father DeBarge was himself sexually molested and physically abused as a child. So apparently like his children and his ex-wife, he didn't want to get examined by a psychologist. It also seems like the rest of the DeBarges, he hid behind religion.

One more thing. The infamous beatdown of PapaD was instigated by Bunny according to Tommy. I guess Uncle Norbert decided to teach Daddy a lesson and beat him down viciously in his own bedroom. Even badass teenaged Bobby was begging and crying for their uncle to stop hurting their father. He just kept on until neighbors called the cops. It's just so ugly. (I think El has discussed this incident too)

Stuff like that might sound good on paper and even feel good in the doing, but the Uncle's handling of the situation was abusive of the kids too. It's clear that every one who's spoken about it is still traumatized by what they saw. These kids really seemed to have not a sane soul around them at all.

[Edited 3/13/12 17:03pm]

brooksie said:

One more thing. The infamous beatdown of PapaD was instigated by Bunny according to Tommy. I guess Uncle Norbert decided to teach Daddy and lesson and beat him down viciously. Even badass teenaged Bobby was begging and crying for their uncle to stop hurting their father. He just kept on until neighbors called the cops. It's just so ugly. (I think El has discussed this incident too)

Stuff like that might sound good on paper and even feel good in the doing, but the Uncle's handling of the situation was abusive of the kids too. It's clear that every one who's spoken about it is still traumatized by what they saw. These kids really seemed to have not a sane soul around them at all.

From the way you worded it, it seems like their mother's side was just as abusive as the father's...

Timmy84 said:

I heard rumors Father DeBarge was himself sexually molested and physically abused as a child. So apparently like his children and his ex-wife, he didn't want to get examined by a psychologist. It also seems like the rest of the DeBarges, he hid behind religion.

I hadn't heard that PapaD was possibly abused as a kid, but I can believe it. His behavior is so OTT yet classic that it's not hard to believe he thought 'if I simply choose someone from an entirely diff world, things will be entirely diff'. Tommy gave some background on both families and they have much in common past the surface. IOW, I wonder about Etterlene...after all, like tends to attract like.

brooksie said:

Timmy84 said:

I heard rumors Father DeBarge was himself sexually molested and physically abused as a child. So apparently like his children and his ex-wife, he didn't want to get examined by a psychologist. It also seems like the rest of the DeBarges, he hid behind religion.

I hadn't heard that PapaD was possibly abused as a kid, but I can believe it. His behavior is so OTT yet classic that it's not hard to believe he thought 'if I simply choose someone from an entirely diff world, things will be entirely diff'. Tommy gave some background on both families and they have much in common past the surface. IOW, I wonder about Etterlene...after all, like tends to attract like.

Yeah seems like Etterlene's hiding some drama within her own immediate family. She was one of fifteen I believe...

Timmy84 said:

brooksie said:

I hadn't heard that PapaD was possibly abused as a kid, but I can believe it. His behavior is so OTT yet classic that it's not hard to believe he thought 'if I simply choose someone from an entirely diff world, things will be entirely diff'. Tommy gave some background on both families and they have much in common past the surface. IOW, I wonder about Etterlene...after all, like tends to attract like.

Yeah seems like Etterlene's hiding some drama within her own immediate family. She was one of fifteen I believe...

Nah, she's one of 12, but a dozen's a whole lot!

brooksie said:

Timmy84 said:

Yeah seems like Etterlene's hiding some drama within her own immediate family. She was one of fifteen I believe...

Nah, she's one of 12, but a dozen's a whole lot!

Right right.

Timmy84 said:

brooksie said:

One more thing. The infamous beatdown of PapaD was instigated by Bunny according to Tommy. I guess Uncle Norbert decided to teach Daddy and lesson and beat him down viciously. Even badass teenaged Bobby was begging and crying for their uncle to stop hurting their father. He just kept on until neighbors called the cops. It's just so ugly. (I think El has discussed this incident too)

Stuff like that might sound good on paper and even feel good in the doing, but the Uncle's handling of the situation was abusive of the kids too. It's clear that every one who's spoken about it is still traumatized by what they saw. These kids really seemed to have not a sane soul around them at all.

From the way you worded it, it seems like their mother's side was just as abusive as the father's...

In a way, yes they were. Tommy states that Bobby had an "eye for an eye" mentality and was big on vengence. Clearly they were influenced by the values they were learning both at home and church, given those are the only places they really went.

This book is full of a certain type of religiosity which frankly makes me feel that healing and acceptance will be elusive for him.

brooksie said:

Timmy84 said:

From the way you worded it, it seems like their mother's side was just as abusive as the father's...

In a way, yes they were. Tommy states that Bobby had an "eye for an eye" mentality and was big on vengence. Clearly they were influenced by the values they were learning both at home and church, given those are the only places they really went.

This book is full of a certain type of religiosity which frankly makes me feel that healing and acceptance will be elusive for him.

Matter of fact it seems the entire family probably acts as gangsta as the uncles who deliver a can of whoop ass on Father DeBarge.

Timmy84 said:

brooksie said:

In a way, yes they were. Tommy states that Bobby had an "eye for an eye" mentality and was big on vengence. Clearly they were influenced by the values they were learning both at home and church, given those are the only places they really went.

This book is full of a certain type of religiosity which frankly makes me feel that healing and acceptance will be elusive for him.

Matter of fact it seems the entire family probably acts as gangsta as the uncles who deliver a can of whoop ass on Father DeBarge.

Yup. Tommy says they were like this. They beat the hale outta each other, but if you stepped to them wrong you had a whole soccer team on ya ass! They seemed to act as a unit...if one did somethng, so they all did. The book is full of examples.

Babyface and Jermaine weren't kidding when they said they were ghetto. MamaD described a very strange sitch when she told of El carving up the church piano w/ the words "James Abney" who was their uncle and choir director. I'm like

Apparently MamaD wasn't too happy w/ Monique for saying that De Barges all had holes in their walls. Sadly for Mama, Tommy confirms this one too!

brooksie said:

Timmy84 said:

Matter of fact it seems the entire family probably acts as gangsta as the uncles who deliver a can of whoop ass on Father DeBarge.

Yup. Tommy says they were like this. They beat the hale outta each other, but if you stepped to them wrong you had a whole soccer team on ya ass! They seemed to act as a unit...if one did somethng, so they all did. The book is full of examples.

Babyface and Jermaine weren't kidding when they said they were ghetto. MamaD described a very strange sitch when she told of El carving up the church piano w/ the words "James Abney" who was their uncle and choir director. I'm like

Apparently MamaD wasn't too happy w/ Monique for saying that De Barges all had holes in their walls. Sadly for Mama, Tommy confirms this one too!

Right, it sounds like all the DeBarges would jump on you if you come out of line with them. El got into it with some internet blogger because he was talking shit. This was right around the time his arrests were making headlines.

Timmy84 said:

brooksie said:

Yup. Tommy says they were like this. They beat the hale outta each other, but if you stepped to them wrong you had a whole soccer team on ya ass! They seemed to act as a unit...if one did somethng, so they all did. The book is full of examples.

Babyface and Jermaine weren't kidding when they said they were ghetto. MamaD described a very strange sitch when she told of El carving up the church piano w/ the words "James Abney" who was their uncle and choir director. I'm like

Apparently MamaD wasn't too happy w/ Monique for saying that De Barges all had holes in their walls. Sadly for Mama, Tommy confirms this one too!

Right, it sounds like all the DeBarges would jump on you if you come out of line with them. El got into it with some internet blogger because he was talking shit. This was right around the time his arrests were making headlines.

Mo Kelly?! That was some funny stuff....El was higher than a mug when he wrote that, but I knew it ain't no fake. Yet somehow his daughter Adris got blamed for it. Did you see where he recently was selling wolf tickets about poor James and Dr. Murray?!

Mo Kelly was just wrong tho. How you gonna post someone's private email like he did? If he really felt threatened, why didn't he just forward it to the fuzz? He clowns El too hard, IMHO.

Scary thing is, I bet either one could really bust somebody's ass if they had to.

On a serious note, I'm wondering how El and Chico are dealing w/ all these spilled beans? They want to move on, but their family is keeping all this mess going. It must be a pain to have siblings sometimes. Glad I ain't got none!

[Edited 3/13/12 21:00pm]

A few more tidbits from the book:

Tommy met both of his wives when they were teens. He met Ducky on her 17th b-day (slept w/ her the same night) and April when she was 19. His relationships w/ both women overlapped for several years and a kid or two.

El got arrested for child support when he came to perform at Bobby's memorial concert.

PapaD almost beat his ass as an adult, in Marty's apt of all places! Given how he'd treated Marty in the past, maybe it was a small bit of poetic justice. It took Bobby, Marty, and James tokeep Papa from doing more than throwing Tommy across the room.

Bobby, not Tommy, was the one who broke Duckie's death to his children.

One of the craziest stories involves MamaD and her next hubby Jorge Rodriguez and how they managed to get both Tommy's money (a car accident settlement) and his kids. This one I really don't understand...as least as Tommy tells it.

Then there's Bobby and a guy named Tony. Tommy outed Bobby good and proper w/ this story. I'm amazed that Bobby made out w/ this man around his own brother.....I think poor Tommy is still traumatized.

Don't worry, there's still plenty of crazy in this book....I didn't spoil it all.

brooksie said:

Timmy84 said:

Right, it sounds like all the DeBarges would jump on you if you come out of line with them. El got into it with some internet blogger because he was talking shit. This was right around the time his arrests were making headlines.

Mo Kelly?! That was some funny stuff....El was higher than a mug when he wrote that, but I knew it ain't no fake. Yet somehow his daughter Adris got blamed for it. Did you see where he recently was selling wolf tickets about poor James and Dr. Murray?!

Mo Kelly was just wrong tho. How you gonna post someone's private email like he did? If he really felt threatened, why didn't he just forward it to the fuzz? He clowns El too hard, IMHO.

Scary thing is, I bet either one could really bust somebody's ass if they had to.

On a serious note, I'm wondering how El and Chico are dealing w/ all these spilled beans? They want to move on, but their family is keeping all this mess going. It must be a pain to have siblings sometimes. Glad I ain't got none!

[Edited 3/13/12 21:00pm]

Yeah I remembered El and TMZ...lol

I do wonder how El and Chico are taking this. Must be real hard for them to hear this stuff since they're younger than their siblings when most of this mess took place.

[Edited 3/13/12 21:44pm]

brooksie said:

A few more tidbits from the book:

Tommy met both of his wives when they were teens. He met Ducky on her 17th b-day (slept w/ her the same night) and April when she was 19. His relationships w/ both women overlapped for several years and a kid or two.

El got arrested for child support when he came to perform at Bobby's memorial concert.

PapaD almost beat his ass as an adult, in Marty's apt of all places! Given how he'd treated Marty in the past, maybe it was a small bit of poetic justice. It took Bobby, Marty, and James tokeep Papa from doing more than throwing Tommy across the room.

Bobby, not Tommy, was the one who broke Duckie's death to his children.

One of the craziest stories involves MamaD and her next hubby Jorge Rodriguez and how they managed to get both Tommy's money (a car accident settlement) and his kids. This one I really don't understand...as least as Tommy tells it.

Then there's Bobby and a guy named Tony. Tommy outed Bobby good and proper w/ this story. I'm amazed that Bobby made out w/ this man around his own brother.....I think poor Tommy is still traumatized.

Don't worry, there's still plenty of crazy in this book....I didn't spoil it all.

Lord have mercy @ the first one.

Not surprised @ the second (but that must've been odd).

@ the third one. I wonder why! And then Bobby, Marty and James having to get Robert Sr. to get off him! Wow...

@ the fourth one.

I read that fifth one. Mama D was WRONG for this if this is true.

@the sixth one, I bet he is. Poor Tommy (and Bobby for that matter).

Timmy84 said:

brooksie said:

A few more tidbits from the book:

Tommy met both of his wives when they were teens. He met Ducky on her 17th b-day (slept w/ her the same night) and April when she was 19. His relationships w/ both women overlapped for several years and a kid or two.

El got arrested for child support when he came to perform at Bobby's memorial concert.

PapaD almost beat his ass as an adult, in Marty's apt of all places! Given how he'd treated Marty in the past, maybe it was a small bit of poetic justice. It took Bobby, Marty, and James tokeep Papa from doing more than throwing Tommy across the room.

Bobby, not Tommy, was the one who broke Duckie's death to his children.

One of the craziest stories involves MamaD and her next hubby Jorge Rodriguez and how they managed to get both Tommy's money (a car accident settlement) and his kids. This one I really don't understand...as least as Tommy tells it.

Then there's Bobby and a guy named Tony. Tommy outed Bobby good and proper w/ this story. I'm amazed that Bobby made out w/ this man around his own brother.....I think poor Tommy is still traumatized.

Don't worry, there's still plenty of crazy in this book....I didn't spoil it all.

Lord have mercy @ the first one.

Not surprised @ the second (but that must've been odd).

@ the third one. I wonder why! And then Bobby, Marty and James having to get Robert Sr. to get off him! Wow...

@ the fourth one.

I read that fifth one. Mama D was WRONG for this if this is true.

@the sixth one, I bet he is. Poor Tommy (and Bobby for that matter).

PapaD became something of a good advice giver once they got grown! He'd tell them they needed to straighten up and fly right (they were all using then pretty much)..be responsible and all that good stuff. Tommy decided that he was gonna tell Papa were to get off and mind his biz. Well the old man didn't take kindly to this, but Tommy made the mistake of looking like his was thinking about hitting the old man. HUGE MISTAKE.

He says PapaD literally threw him across the table and came over to really give him a sho nuff ass kicking like when he was a kid. Bobby, Randy, and Marty had to pry him off and talk him down (sorry, mistake in the previous post...it was Randy and not James). I'd say Tommy was about 23 or so. That old White dude was no joke...he really had power over them even as grown men!

Well El only got arrested AFTER the concert, so there was a silver lining!

Tommy has some major issues surrounding his sexuality. He seems to blame Bobby for them, but I think it's more complicated than this. Depending on where one stands on whether or not sexuality is inherited vs learned, I think that Bobby's bisexuality is probably more the norm in this family than not, including PapaD. Adding the intense religious and cultural pressures to it, it took a rebel like Bobby to be open about it.

His thing w/ both Duckie and April must have been truly a nightmare at times given how obsessed he was w/ voyuerism and the idea that he couldn't satisfy his women. To put it bluntly, Tommy was convinced he was being cheated on, but he wanted to watch!

brooksie said:

Timmy84 said:

Lord have mercy @ the first one.

Not surprised @ the second (but that must've been odd).

@ the third one. I wonder why! And then Bobby, Marty and James having to get Robert Sr. to get off him! Wow...

@ the fourth one.

I read that fifth one. Mama D was WRONG for this if this is true.

@the sixth one, I bet he is. Poor Tommy (and Bobby for that matter).

PapaD became something of a good advice giver once they got grown! He'd tell them they needed to straighten up and fly right (they were all using then pretty much)..be responsible and all that good stuff. Tommy decided that he was gonna tell Papa were to get off and mind his biz. Well the old man didn't take kindly to this, but Tommy made the mistake of looking like his was thinking about hitting the old man. HUGE MISTAKE.

He says PapaD literally threw him across the table and came over to really give him a sho nuff ass kicking like when he was a kid. Bobby, Randy, and Marty had to pry him off and talk him down (sorry, mistake in the previous post...it was Randy and not James). I'd say Tommy was about 23 or so. That old White dude was no joke...he really had power over them even as grown men!

Well El only got arrested AFTER the concert, so there was a silver lining!

Tommy has some major issues surrounding his sexuality. He seems to blame Bobby for them, but I think it's more complicated than this. Depending on where one stands on whether or not sexuality is inherited vs learned, I think that Bobby's bisexuality is probably more the norm in this family than not, including PapaD. Adding the intense religious and cultural pressures to it, it took a rebel like Bobby to be open about it.

His thing w/ both Duckie and April must have been truly a nightmare at times given how obsessed he was w/ voyuerism and the idea that he couldn't satisfy his women. To put it bluntly, Tommy was convinced he was being cheated on, but he wanted to watch!

Wow so basically Tommy took the Marvin Gaye route with the voyeurism and standing up to his dad?

Timmy84 said:

brooksie said:

His thing w/ both Duckie and April must have been truly a nightmare at times given how obsessed he was w/ voyuerism and the idea that he couldn't satisfy his women. To put it bluntly, Tommy was convinced he was being cheated on, but he wanted to watch!

Wow so basically Tommy took the Marvin Gaye route with the voyeurism and standing up to his dad?

Oh man...wow. I was thinking of the resemblance of PapaD and Rev. Marvin Gaye Sr., but I didn't know Marvin (Jr.) was a watcher too. This obsession is prevelent thru most of the book and seems to still be a big thing for Tommy.

It's as if he feels he's inadequate as a man, so he doesn't truly believe women get pleasure from him. So he wants to see how "real men" please his woman. He seems fixated on the woman's pleasure, but I think the guys might interest him too.

He's got a real hang up about gays tho.

[Edited 3/13/12 22:36pm]

brooksie said:

Timmy84 said:

Wow so basically Tommy took the Marvin Gaye route with the voyeurism and standing up to his dad?

Oh man...wow. I was thinking of the resemblence of PapaD and Rev. Marvin Gaye Sr., but I didn't know Marvin (Jr.) was a watcher too. This obsession is revelent thru most of the book and seems to still be a big thing for Tommy.

It's as if he feels he's inadequate as a man, so he doesn't truly believe women get pleasure from him. So he wants to see how "real men" please his woman. He seems fixated on the woman's pleasure, but I think the guys might interest him too.

He's got a real hang up abut gays tho.

Seeing as how he was shocked at Bobby's openness I'm not shocked actually.

brooksie said:

A few more tidbits from the book:

Tommy met both of his wives when they were teens. He met Ducky on her 17th b-day (slept w/ her the same night) and April when she was 19. His relationships w/ both women overlapped for several years and a kid or two.

El got arrested for child support when he came to perform at Bobby's memorial concert.

PapaD almost beat his ass as an adult, in Marty's apt of all places! Given how he'd treated Marty in the past, maybe it was a small bit of poetic justice. It took Bobby, Marty, and James tokeep Papa from doing more than throwing Tommy across the room.

Bobby, not Tommy, was the one who broke Duckie's death to his children.

One of the craziest stories involves MamaD and her next hubby Jorge Rodriguez and how they managed to get both Tommy's money (a car accident settlement) and his kids. This one I really don't understand...as least as Tommy tells it.

Then there's Bobby and a guy named Tony. Tommy outed Bobby good and proper w/ this story. I'm amazed that Bobby made out w/ this man around his own brother.....I think poor Tommy is still traumatized.

Don't worry, there's still plenty of crazy in this book....I didn't spoil it all.

El got arrested at the concert for child support...dizzam! I used to think they were so squeaky clean when they first came out.

Timmy84 said:

brooksie said:

Mo Kelly?! That was some funny stuff....El was higher than a mug when he wrote that, but I knew it ain't no fake. Yet somehow his daughter Adris got blamed for it. Did you see where he recently was selling wolf tickets about poor James and Dr. Murray?!

Mo Kelly was just wrong tho. How you gonna post someone's private email like he did? If he really felt threatened, why didn't he just forward it to the fuzz? He clowns El too hard, IMHO.

Scary thing is, I bet either one could really bust somebody's ass if they had to.

On a serious note, I'm wondering how El and Chico are dealing w/ all these spilled beans? They want to move on, but their family is keeping all this mess going. It must be a pain to have siblings sometimes. Glad I ain't got none!

[Edited 3/13/12 21:00pm]

Yeah I remembered El and TMZ...lol

I do wonder how El and Chico are taking this. Must be real hard for them to hear this stuff since they're younger than their siblings when most of this mess took place.

[Edited 3/13/12 21:44pm]

Everybody has been very careful about discussing El outright. They seem to try and respect his obvious feelings against airing all the dirty laundry when it comes to him specifically. Unfortunately, they can't obscure the fact that El was dealing w/ it too, at least on some level. El's behavior shows he was affected, IMHO.

Considering that James was such a focus of positive and negative attention from both father and brother Bobby, El couldn't be in the position of Chico by not feeling the full brunt of the fuckery. El's older than James, yet Chico is several years behind either. Whatever El's role was, it surely wasn't "Daddy's favorite" because that was James' role. If anything, it seems El was Bobby's favorite and music protege....and given what's been said about Bobby, that may have had some very negative consequences indeed.

I've noticed that all the De Barges are very good at implying things w/o saying something outright. Bunny said something along the lines of when Bobby came out to her as a bisexual in the Switch era, he told her he liked turning out young dudes who didn't know that they even wanted a man. As I say, the De Barges use implication to deal w/ very unplesant facts sometimes.

Chico and the twins were probably not exempt either, but it was far less intense. PapaD moved w/ them to Grand Rapids, but he came and went back between Etterlene and other women. That said, apparently James moved back w/ him at some point because he was attending HS in Detroit when he joined De Barge. IOW, PapaD was still quite active in these kids lives after their divorce, so it seems. Etterlene tried to make out otherwise, but Tommy blew up her spot!