I have to admit, I was going to buy tickets to the KEM show when I heard El was on the bill, but then wondered if he'd show, would he be in his right mind, etc. The thing with addicts, they get mega fat when they are clean so I kind of worried that El was probably not all that straightened out yet. I hope he can beat this.

missfee said:

Graycap23 said:

Has nothing 2 do with judgemental. I don't waste my time with drug addicts. That includes anyone that I know related or otherwise. U know damn well that drugs are addictive before u EVER try it. If u get hooked.....u deserve 2 be hooked.

Wow that's harsh and heartless, but to each his own.

It is............what it is.

There are enough problems in the world of humans without adding 2 your own woes with drugs and alcohol. What a waste.

missfee said:

Graycap23 said:

Has nothing 2 do with judgemental. I don't waste my time with drug addicts. That includes anyone that I know related or otherwise. U know damn well that drugs are addictive before u EVER try it. If u get hooked.....u deserve 2 be hooked.

Wow that's harsh and heartless, but to each his own.

Graycap23 said:

missfee said:

Wow that's harsh and heartless, but to each his own.

It is............what it is.

There are enough problems in the world of humans without adding 2 your own woes with drugs and alcohol. What a waste.

I disagree. EVERYBODY has issues, it all comes down to how a person can handle it. Some people can't or don't know how to handle issues that are thrown at them. I'm not sitting up here saying that yes they should take drugs and use alcohol, smoke cigarettes, etc. in order to handle their problems, but just saying that no one is perfect. Some people make worse decisions than others but what matters is what they do to come out of their addicitions. Like someone mentioned before, the first step to recovery is admittance and El has done that. I can understand your opinion but at the same time, I just think it's easier to judge when you haven't been there. No I have never been an addict of any kind, but at the same time, I'm not going to sit up here and judge those who are/or were either. What right do I or anyone else have to say that someone is a "waste" because they need help? I just think that's crazy and close minded. But that's me.

Graycap23 said:

missfee said:

Huh? I'm surprised that you would say something like that. Could you explain?

[Edited 2/15/11 6:41am]

How many times can u "relapse"?

Anyone who has ever been addicted to anything knows you can spend years relapsing.

gdiminished said:

missfee said:

Wow that's harsh and heartless, but to each his own.

No need to enable someone who uses...

That's not enabling.

missfee said:

gdiminished said:

No need to enable someone who uses...

That's not enabling.

gdiminished said:

missfee said:

That's not enabling.

Giving them second chances amounts to the same thing.

Everyone does deserve a second chance. And no that isn't enabling.

HBO aird a documenatary about university doctors in Philadelphia studying the physiological affects drugs have on the brain. Once I saw that, it changed my mind and my perceptions of what addiction is, what it does, and why it's not as simple to stop because you want to. There's no such thing as going in once or twice for treatment and you're "cured".

==========

[Edited 2/15/11 8:32am]

luv4u said:

Wishing El luck and the strength to get through his difficult time. He's got good friends. He's just got to stay away from those that are bad who come into his circle.

EXACTLY. I think it's a good sign that he's voluntarily checked himself in; it indicates to me that he knows his "triggers", that's a very good sign. If he feels himself succumbing, then rehab is exactly wwhere he needs to be, and like you said, away from the leeches trying to come close to him. With his successful musical rebound I can only imagine what kind of hustlers have attempted to cozy up to him this year. There's always predators out there trying to ride the gravy train

El Debarge is worthy of chances just like one gives to any one else. The fact that he is famous makes no difference. What does matter is the fact that he saw that he needed help and got it-some folks never get to that point So again I wish him all the luck in the world with it and hope he gets a chance to make another cd-Second Chance is nice.

Graycap23 said:

This guy is a waste of time.

If that's the attitude we took towards everyone that is struggling in life...

Ottensen said:

Graycap23 said:

This guy is a waste of time.

If that's the attitude we took towards everyone that is struggling in life...

agreed

missfee said:

Graycap23 said:

It is............what it is.

There are enough problems in the world of humans without adding 2 your own woes with drugs and alcohol. What a waste.

I disagree. EVERYBODY has issues, it all comes down to how a person can handle it. Some people can't or don't know how to handle issues that are thrown at them. I'm not sitting up here saying that yes they should take drugs and use alcohol, smoke cigarettes, etc. in order to handle their problems, but just saying that no one is perfect. Some people make worse decisions than others but what matters is what they do to come out of their addicitions. Like someone mentioned before, the first step to recovery is admittance and El has done that. I can understand your opinion but at the same time, I just think it's easier to judge when you haven't been there. No I have never been an addict of any kind, but at the same time, I'm not going to sit up here and judge those who are/or were either. What right do I or anyone else have to say that someone is a "waste" because they need help? I just think that's crazy and close minded. But that's me.

On the subject of drugs and alcohol.........my mind is closed. It does NOTHING but destroy the human body and mind.

Damn.... Good luck El... I really like his new and and is rooting for him to get better

TD3 said:

HBO aird a documenatary about university doctors in Philadelphia studying the physiological affects drugs have on the brain. Once I saw that, it changed my mind and my perceptions of what addiction is, what it does, and why it's not as simple to stop because you want to. There's no such thing as going in once or twice for treatment and you're "cured".

==========

[Edited 2/15/11 8:32am]

Exactly why u should NEVER start using in the 1st place.

This news makes me sad!

Graycap23 said:

missfee said:

He's human. He isn't perfect. Just because he might have kicked it once or twice doesn't mean he's officially "cured". C'mon now. The man deserves credit for even RECOGNIZING that he needed to go back to rehab. You don't get over a 25 year drug habit in what 1-2 years. Let's be realisitic and less judgemental.

[Edited 2/15/11 6:50am]

Has nothing 2 do with judgemental. I don't waste my time with drug addicts. That includes anyone that I know related or otherwise. U know damn well that drugs are addictive before u EVER try it. If u get hooked.....u deserve 2 be hooked.

Nasty and ignorant.

They say that relapsing is a part of the recovery process. I'm just glad that El got a grip of it before he went back to being a full blown drug addict again. To be honest, I had a feeling this was going to happen. When I saw him perform at the Highline Ballroom in Manhattan when the "Second Chance" CD came out, at some parts of the show, I couldn't make out what he was singing but he had Doug E. Fresh come up there later using the same mic and I could hear him clearly. It could have been technical issues but I felt uncomfortable and I wasn't the only one wondering if El was drinking or worse that either.

I hope and pray that his stint in rehab will be THE LAST TIME he has to go back there. We need El back out here to show everyone what real music by real musicians is all about and he needs to be healthy not only for us fans, but for his family and most importanly, himself. My prayers to El and the DeBarge family.

purplethunder3121 said:

Graycap23 said:

Has nothing 2 do with judgemental. I don't waste my time with drug addicts. That includes anyone that I know related or otherwise. U know damn well that drugs are addictive before u EVER try it. If u get hooked.....u deserve 2 be hooked.

Nasty and ignorant.

Mirror, mirrow on the wall............

Ottensen said:

luv4u said:

Wishing El luck and the strength to get through his difficult time. He's got good friends. He's just got to stay away from those that are bad who come into his circle.

EXACTLY. I think it's a good sign that he's voluntarily checked himself in; it indicates to me that he knows his "triggers", that's a very good sign. If he feels himself succumbing, then rehab is exactly wwhere he needs to be, and like you said, away from the leeches trying to come close to him. With his successful musical rebound I can only imagine what kind of hustlers have attempted to cozy up to him this year. There's always predators out there trying to ride the gravy train

Exactly.

Ottensen said:

Graycap23 said:

This guy is a waste of time.

If that's the attitude we took towards everyone that is struggling in life...

Exactly.

TD3 said:

HBO aird a documenatary about university doctors in Philadelphia studying the physiological affects drugs have on the brain. Once I saw that, it changed my mind and my perceptions of what addiction is, what it does, and why it's not as simple to stop because you want to. There's no such thing as going in once or twice for treatment and you're "cured".

==========

[Edited 2/15/11 8:32am]

Drugs damage the brain and they stay in your system long after you've stopped using which is why it's so easy to relaspe. I remember watching some medical show a while back where the doctor said that certain drugs like heroine and some prescription meds get stored in the fat cells and some chemicals can stay in your body for up to 3 years after exposure. I think most people are under the misconception that you have to repeatedly use drugs over a long period of time in order to get addicted. So untrue. It really does take one hit.

Graycap23 said:

TD3 said:

HBO aird a documenatary about university doctors in Philadelphia studying the physiological affects drugs have on the brain. Once I saw that, it changed my mind and my perceptions of what addiction is, what it does, and why it's not as simple to stop because you want to. There's no such thing as going in once or twice for treatment and you're "cured".

==========

[Edited 2/15/11 8:32am]

Exactly why u should NEVER start using in the 1st place.

I agree with that. It's best not to even get started or experimenting with drugs in the first place but there's usually a reason people start taking drugs. It's not just as simple as being a screw up and wanting to get high.

I don't think it's fair to just write El off as a "waste of time". El's been a longtime drug user, since the 80's. You can't expect him to get better in just a year or two. Most people will have setbacks. El at least wants to get better though. He's taking the right steps. But I feel that El needs to get to the root cause of why he started using in the first place. I know his Family has been through a lot. The Father from what i've read was quite abusive. Having an abusive Father doesn't mean that it gives you an excuse to go out there and do drugs, but everyone deals with things differently. Some handle hardship better than others.

In addition to rehab, maybe El and some of his family members can go to therapy. From what i've read about the family, it certainly wouldn't hurt I don't think.

Whatever the case, I certainly do wish him the best. I really like El and hope he can recover. Whether it takes months or years, whatever it is, he needs to take however much time he needs to start healing.

Cinnamon234 said:

Graycap23 said:

Exactly why u should NEVER start using in the 1st place.

I agree with that. It's best not to even get started or experimenting with drugs in the first place but there's usually a reason people start taking drugs. It's not just as simple as being a screw up and wanting to get high.

I don't think it's fair to just write El off as a "waste of time". El's been a longtime drug user, since the 80's. You can't expect him to get better in just a year or two. Most people will have setbacks. El at least wants to get better though. He's taking the right steps. But I feel that El needs to get to the root cause of why he started using in the first place. I know his Family has been through a lot. The Father from what i've read was quite abusive. Having an abusive Father doesn't mean that it gives you an excuse to go out there and do drugs, but everyone deals with things differently. Some handle hardship better than others.

In addition to rehab, maybe El and some of his family members can go to therapy. From what i've read about the family, it certainly wouldn't hurt I don't think.

Whatever the case, I certainly do wish him the best. I really like El and hope he can recover. Whether it takes months or years, whatever it is, he needs to take however much time he needs to start healing.

I certainly wish him and all drug addicts the best with trying 2 kick their addiction. That said, I don't need 2 be involved with the nonsense. That is how how I see it.

U learn at a very yong age that drugs are destructive............and u do them anyway? Please.

HotGritz said:

TD3 said:

HBO aird a documenatary about university doctors in Philadelphia studying the physiological affects drugs have on the brain. Once I saw that, it changed my mind and my perceptions of what addiction is, what it does, and why it's not as simple to stop because you want to. There's no such thing as going in once or twice for treatment and you're "cured".

==========

[Edited 2/15/11 8:32am]

Drugs damage the brain and they stay in your system long after you've stopped using which is why it's so easy to relaspe. I remember watching some medical show a while back where the doctor said that certain drugs like heroine and some prescription meds get stored in the fat cells and some chemicals can stay in your body for up to 3 years after exposure. I think most people are under the misconception that you have to repeatedly use drugs over a long period of time in order to get addicted. So untrue. It really does take one hit.

In this documentary the physicians study found one of the "side effects" of drug addiction is, the brain is rewired permanently. Even if a former user has been clean for a couple months or a decade, if the user starts up those triggers pick-up right where they left off. So your brain is now wired and has come accustom to alcohol and/or your drug of choice. So, anytype of treatment plan a users chooses, the goal is to stop; it takes time for this rewired brain triggers to go dormant, they're still there but over time they adjust to not being "fed". Hence the upteem relapes. . . .

Everyone surely has a right to their opinion but we all have done things we've shouldn't have done. If you've been blessed to get through life without doing something foolish, please, write a book.

==========

[Edited 2/15/11 11:57am]

TD3 said:

HotGritz said:

Drugs damage the brain and they stay in your system long after you've stopped using which is why it's so easy to relaspe. I remember watching some medical show a while back where the doctor said that certain drugs like heroine and some prescription meds get stored in the fat cells and some chemicals can stay in your body for up to 3 years after exposure. I think most people are under the misconception that you have to repeatedly use drugs over a long period of time in order to get addicted. So untrue. It really does take one hit.

In this documentary the physicians study found one of the "side effects" of drug addiction is, the brain is rewired permanently. Even if a former user has been clean for a couple months or a decade, if the user starts up those triggers pick-up right where they left off. So your brain is now wired and has come accustom to alcohol and/or your drug of choice. So, anytype of treatment plan a users chooses, the goal is to stop. It takes time for this rewired brain triggers to go dormant, they're still there but over time for them to adjust not being "feed". Hence the upteem relapes. . . .

Everyone surely has a right to their opinion but we all have done things we've shouldn't have done. If you've been blessed to get through life without doing something foolish, please, write a book.

I draw the line at drug addicts, liars, thieves & alcoholics.

TD3 said:

HotGritz said:

Drugs damage the brain and they stay in your system long after you've stopped using which is why it's so easy to relaspe. I remember watching some medical show a while back where the doctor said that certain drugs like heroine and some prescription meds get stored in the fat cells and some chemicals can stay in your body for up to 3 years after exposure. I think most people are under the misconception that you have to repeatedly use drugs over a long period of time in order to get addicted. So untrue. It really does take one hit.

In this documentary the physicians study found one of the "side effects" of drug addiction is, the brain is rewired permanently. Even if a former user has been clean for a couple months or a decade, if the user starts up those triggers pick-up right where they left off. So your brain is now wired and has come accustom to alcohol and/or your drug of choice. So, anytype of treatment plan a users chooses, the goal is to stop. It takes time for this rewired brain triggers to go dormant, they're still there but over time for them to adjust not being "feed". Hence the upteem relapes. . . .

Everyone surely has a right to their opinion but we all have done things we've shouldn't have done. If you've been blessed to get through life without doing something foolish, please, write a book.

Chemical reactions in the body . I've long believed that one's brain can be rewired as the result of external influences be they chemicals, hormones, physical trauma etc. Just as you can program and reprogram a computer you can almost do the same with the human brain. I know El will never be the same person he was prior to his drug use, family drama and prison time but I pray he heals and learns to adapt to a new state of living; a more positive one. He can't change his past but he can secure his future. He needs to stick with the right people and stay in a healthy environment because he is still very much fragile. Plus he needs to not try and live up to other people's expectations. Now that he's relasped yet again...the industry critics will be even more harsh.

Yeah the brain does change when drugs are brought into the picture. Marvin tried to stop numerous times but felt he was hopeless. I'm sure other addicts, famous and not famous, have been through relapses or near relapses. I'm just glad there's those that do feel the need for a drug but control themselves well enough not to do it.

Timmy84 said:

Yeah the brain does change when drugs are brought into the picture. Marvin tried to stop numerous times but felt he was hopeless. I'm sure other addicts, famous and not famous, have been through relapses or near relapses. I'm just glad there's those that do feel the need for a drug but control themselves well enough not to do it.

The human condition.

As my husband says, "As long as there have been humans on this earth we've tried and experimented upteem different ways to fuck and get high."