Found this on another forum and thought some of ya'll might need a laugh

doa'nt knoe iff yal hurd tihs, butt thay wana lok a nega upp. mye beeyootiful faise wuz nott maid foar prizun, und their aiy'nt noe happee peepel stepin inn jale.

soe wat kan i doo?

kash inn, negas.

sum uv yoo ollreddy knoe abowt mye noo hitt rekurd, Stepp Inn Thu Naim uv Laww: Thu Secks Taip Tryle Remickses.

- Stepp Inn Thu Naim Uv Laww
- Planetiffs Onlee
- Thu Gratest Tryle Onn Erth
- Yore Bennch's Kallin
- Leeve Yore Arranement
- Hoamie Lawwyur Frend
- Doa'nt Yoo Saie Gilltee
- Stepp Inn Mye (Korte)Roome
- Secks Plee (Partes 1 &2)
- A Woomin's Thret
- Ryse Upp (Yore Rite Hande)
- Happee Summins-tyme
- Wen A Judje's Fedd Upp
- I Wissh Remicks (Too Thu Ubjekshuns Wee Loste)
- Fealin Onn Yore Bailliff

und mye noo hitt singel, "Wel-Hunng Juree"...

butt tahts nawt thu bigg annownsemint. thu bigg annownsemint iz...

RUBBERT'S STOAR.

https://www.cafepress.com...ertsstoar/

cotdamm nega, evury singel won uv theeze prahdukts iz a MOST HAV. lettz doo a kwik runndoun uv thu hilites, shal wee?

doant bee cot onn thu streats wifowt ur rubbert kolly hoody: http://www.cafepress.com/....264549278

yt peepel, yoo goein golphin? lett thoas crakurs knoe ur doun wif shy townes numbur won steppur: http://www.cafepress.com/....264549290

yello teeshurts, juste cuz im a nega hoo luvs eyeronie: http://www.cafepress.com/....264549294

yal knoe rubbert luvs yung peepel (nawt gilltee). laydees, hears sum kloathing foar ur baybees! http://www.cafepress.com/....264549319

bibbs nega. bibbs. http://www.cafepress.com/....264549320

wat tyme iz itt? rubbert tyme. http://www.cafepress.com/....264549268

ashtun koosher kalld mee und oardurd fiftene uv theeze: http://www.cafepress.com/....264549261

oll tihs murchindice und moar iz availubbel RITE NOWE. und evury dollur goez too a chairitee undur thu naim "edwurd gensin." i hoap too cee fotos uv oll mye UKP fanns wairin mye siht.

hav funn shahppin!


http://en.wikipedia.org/w...The_Closet

stip on thhu nome uv luff!

donnt beliief j.z. thay hadd gunnz yo


[Edited 5/13/08 19:59pm]

I can't breathe!!!

Speaking of Sylvester (Allegedly) the Molester's trial:

R. Kelly jury up to 8 members
8 more must be selected to fill panel of 12 jurors and 4 alternates

By Stacy St. Clair | Tribune reporter
May 14, 2008

Jury selection in the R. Kelly trial reached the halfway point Tuesday as attorneys from both sides agreed on five more jurors.

The child pornography case now has eight jurors—five men and three women—who will decide the R&B superstar's fate. The eight are split evenly between black and white members.

The newest jurors chosen are a teacher's aide, a married man in his 40s, a criminal justice student, an investment firm compliance officer and a man with prior jury experience. They join three people selected after Monday's questioning.

Before opening statements can begin, attorneys must settle on 12 jurors and four alternates to serve on the high-profile case. The trial, which has drawn international media attention, is expected to last several weeks.

Kelly, 41, is charged with 14 counts of child pornography stemming from a sexually explicit videotape that authorities say he made with a girl as young as 13.

Prosecutors say the tape was made sometime between Jan. 1, 1998 and Oct. 1, 2000. Kelly has pleaded not guilty.

Dressed in a sand-colored suit and gold patterned tie, Kelly did not take an active role in jury selection for the second consecutive day. He appeared to be fighting to keep his eyes open as lawyers asked the same questions about presumption of innocence, the right to a fair trial and reasonable doubt.

Among Kelly's newest jurors, the investment banker fought hardest to be excused. He wrote on his questionnaire that his service would create a financial burden so severe, he would struggle to afford "food and water." He said Tuesday that his boss assured him they could work something out.

The man, who is white and sported an "Impeach Bush" button on his backpack, said he would take his jury duties seriously if picked.

"I would make sure I would hold myself to very high standards," he said.

Another man picked Tuesday suggested he would be a good juror based on his prior jury service in two civil trials. The man, also white, said he had not followed the case much.

Of the eight selected so far, only one seems to be wholly familiar with R. Kelly and his music. The panelist, a black woman who works as a teacher's aide at a local Catholic school, told the judge that her friends have discussed the case and are evenly split about the singer's innocence. Some believe Kelly's shown in the tape, while others don't believe it's him, she said.

The woman works at the Catholic school that once employed Rev. Daniel McCormack, who pleaded guilty last year to fondling five boys ranging in age from 8 to 12 inside the school's rectory.

McCormack's case was tried by Assistant State's Atty. Shauna Boliker, who is also the lead prosecutor on the Kelly case.

Another juror, a married culinary student who is black, recognized the names of two potential witnesses, but said he had not followed the case much since the singer's 2002 indictment.

"I don't know the facts yet," he said.

The panel's youngest member is a criminal justice student who wants to be a police officer. She has been in school for five years.

Jury selection resumes Wednesday.

Kells ain't gonna sell anything if he can't spell correctly. Illiterate mofo.

Timmy84 said:[quote]Speaking of Sylvester (Allegedly) the Molester's trial:

The panel's youngest member is a criminal justice student who wants to be a police officer. She has been in school for five years.

well her teacher picked the best internship for her. you get past this trial and you will be ready to protect yourself and the other youngins out there.

what the fuck?

i just embarassed myself at work laughing so hard

When bboy87 says he "found this on another forum. He really means he stole it from Okayplayer.com!!!

Paris9748430 said:

Stole it? He didn't claim it as his own.

RipHer2Shreds said:

LOL, it ain't like he committed an unlawful act.

He can do what he wanna do.

nWo, bitches!

Paris9748430 said:

I didn't steal it, I copied it and posted it here.

I ain't that creative to come up with something THIS genius

I give credit to the alias "Rubbert Kolly" on OKP

The original post on OKP
http://board.okayplayer.c...3057&page=

The jury has been selected (two out of four alternates to be picked by end of day):

R. Kelly jury selected

May 15, 2008

BY SUN-TIMES STAFF

A complete, 12-member jury has been picked for the R. Kelly child pornography trial. The jury that will decide Kelly's fate consists of eight men and four women. Eight of the jurors are white, while four are African-American.

Two alternates were also selected this morning. The judge and lawyers on the case must still select two more alternate jurors, a process expected to be completed this afternoon.
[Edited 5/15/08 12:42pm]

Only 2 alternates left to be picked for R. Kelly jury

Associated Press - May 15, 2008 3:14 PM ET

CHICAGO (AP) - A young woman who said she once was raped is among the six latest jurors chosen to serve on the panel at R. Kelly's child pornography trial.

Thursday's picks nearly complete the jury selection stage of the R&B singer's trial, increasing the odds that opening statements will get under way early next week.

Fourteen jurors, including two alternates, have been chosen so far. Two more alternates must be selected. Attorneys and the judge are continuing the questioning process.

Kelly's accused of videotaping himself having sex with a girl as young as 13. He's pleaded not guilty and faces up to 15 years in prison if convicted.

oh, LAWD!!! Ow, my stomach hurts. .