ON HER ABILITY TO READ MEN
''When I talk to a man, I can always tell what he's thinkin' by where he's lookin'. See, if he's lookin' at my eyes, he's lookin' for intelligence. If he's lookin' at my mouth, well, he's lookin' for wit and wisdom. If he's lookin' anywhere else except my chest... he's lookin' for another man.'' — Onstage at Dollywood, date unknown

ON HER GAY FOLLOWING
''Well... I'm very honored. I think they just know that I accept everybody as they are.... And they're a bit flamboyant for the most part, and so am I. They relate to the gaudiness.'' — To ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY, 2005

ON WHAT SHE'D DO IF SHE WEREN'T A SINGER/SONGWRITER
''If it hadn't been for music, I'd have been a beautician.... Even if I wasn't in show business, I would have wanted all the glamour — and that's about the only way a girl in a small Southern town is going to get it, being a beautician. Or maybe I'd have been a missionary; I thought about that too, but where would I get my hair done?'' — To the Saturday Evening Post, 1989

ON HER LOOK...
''I really patterned my look, the country girl's idea of glamour, after what they call the town tramp.... She had this beautiful peroxide hair and had it piled on her head, red nails, high-heeled shoes and I just thought she was the prettiest thing I'd ever seen. And Mama said, 'Oh, she ain't nothin' but trash!' And so I thought, That's what I want to be Mama. I want to be trash!''



AND THE UPKEEP
''When my husband said, 'Let me see your boobs,' and I had to put my skirt up, I thought I better get 'em lifted. It's time!.... If I see somethin' draggin', saggin', and baggin', I go get it fixed.'' — To British talk show host Michael Parkinson, date unknown

INTRODUCING ''JOLENE'' TO THE BRITS
''I want to go back now and do a song for you that was a big record over here many years ago. This is a story about an old redheaded girl that was tryin' to steal my husband back in the late '60s. Now, you know women do that sort of thing, right? But I want you to know she didn't get him. I fought that redheaded woman like a wild cat. She jerked my wig off and almost beat me to death with it. She beat the tar out of me, but I kept my husband. I got that sucker home, and I beat the tar out of him. Her name was Jolene.'' — From the 1983 TV special Dolly in Concert

ON HER HUSBAND, CARL, WHOM SHE MET AT THE WISHY-WASHY LAUNDROMAT IN 1964, ON HER FIRST DAY IN NASHVILLE
''You know Carl is not the most comfortable person to be around show business. He can't relate to it. I think he's seen me perform only once. But thank goodness, I've seen Carl perform hundreds of times. And millions of times he's come back for an encore. And he's no stranger to a standing ovation. If it's standing, I give him an ovation.'' — Onstage at Dollywood, date unknown

ON WHETHER SHE ROMANCED HER BEST LITTLE WHOREHOUSE IN TEXAS COSTAR BURT REYNOLDS
''Burt and I are too much alike to be involved. We both wear wigs and high heels and we both have a roll around the middle.'' — In her 1994 autobiography Dolly: My Life and Other Unfinished Business

ON HER HUSBAND CARL'S RESPONSE TO THOSE RUMORS
''One day at home I was playing with our little dog, this little Boston terrier bulldog that we love. I'd wrapped him in a blanket and was carryin' him around.... [Carl] took a picture of me with this little ugly dog and he said, 'Here. I want you to send this to The National Enquirer and tell 'em that this is a picture of your and Burt's baby.''' — to TV Guide, 1993

AS DORALEE RHODES IN 1980's 9 to 5
''Look, I got a gun out there in my purse, and up to now, I've been forgivin' and forgettin' because of the way I was brought up. But I'll tell you one thing, if you ever say another word about me, or make another indecent proposal, I'm gonna get that gun of mine, and I'm gonna change you from a rooster to a hen with one shot.''

AS TRUVY, IN 1989'S STEEL MAGNOLIAS
''Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion.''

ON ''ME AND LITTLE ANDY,'' ARGUABLY THE SADDEST SONG EVER


It is a sad-ass song, I have to tell you. I used to do that song on stage, then I got asked one time in Vegas if I could please not. The casino wanted the audience to drink more and lose more money — they didn't want to bring 'em down. Me singin' about some little kid whose daddy's a drunkard, it's just too much.'' — to ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY, 2005

ON HER CONTROVERSIAL 1968 SONG ''JUST BECAUSE I'M A WOMAN''
''That song was based on a true story. My husband doesn't particularly like for me to tell this, but he's old enough now, so he don't really give a big s---... See, I had sex before we met, but I hadn't mentioned it, and he hadn't asked. We were married for eight months, happy as we could be, and all of a sudden he decides to ask. I told him the truth, and it broke his heart. He could not get over that for the longest time. I thought, 'Well, my goodness, what's the big damn deal?''' — to Rolling Stone, 2003

I can see youre disappointed
By the way you look at me
And Im sorry that Im not
The woman you thought Id be
Yes, Ive made my mistakes
But listen and understand
My mistakes are no worse than yours
Just because Im a woman

So when you look at me
Dont feel sorry for yourself
Just think of all the shame
You might have brought somebody else

Just let me tell you this
Then well both know where we stand
My mistakes are no worse than yours
Just because Im a woman

Now a man will take a good girl
And hell ruin her reputation
But when he wants to marry
Well, thats a different situation

Hell just walk off and leave her
To do the best she can
While he looks for an angel
To wear his wedding band

Now I know that Im no angel
If thats what you thought youd found
I was just the victum of
A man that let me down

Yes, Ive made my mistakes
But listen and understand
My mistakes are no worse than yours
Just because Im a woman

No, my mistakes are no worse than yours
Just because Im a woman

ON HER CONTROVERSIAL 1993 HIT ''ROMEO''
''I was surprised [at the hullabaloo], to be honest. I wasn't shocked, because I know how prudish some people can be. A lot of guys thought it was real sexist. They said, 'Women don't think that way,' and I went, 'HA! HA! HA! You think we don't look at your butts when you walk by, just like you do ours?''' — to the Chicago Tribune, 1993

ON DUMB BLOND JOKES
''I'm not offended at all because I know I'm not a dumb blond. I also know I'm not a blond.'' — to PEOPLE, 1982

ON WHETHER HER IMAGE REFLECTS THE AMOUNT OF RESPECT SHE RECEIVES
''Years ago, people used to tell me, 'Dolly, you're a great writer, you're a good singer, if you'd just kind of dress down and not be so gaudy and outrageous and this and that...' And I said: Well, why? Then I won't have any fun.... I think people take me as seriously as I want them to. They take me as seriously as I take myself — let's put it that way. I'm very secure about my talents and about who I am. But it's fun for me, and I think I'm fun for other people, and it's just an unusual kind of package, and why not? That I can look totally artificial and be totally real is perfectly fine with me.'' — to the Chicago Tribune, 1992

Dolly on Johnny Carson:


ON WHETHER SHE'D EVER DE-GLAM FOR A MOVIE ROLE
''Honey, I might. But let me tell you, I'd practically have to have an Oscar in my hand before I took off all this stuff. I know what's under here. You don't want to! But I act when I sing. That's what singing is, really. I wrote a lyric once, 'Music is the voice of the soul.' It's true. And all that I want to express, I can express through my songs.'' — to the New York Post's Liz Smith, 2006

ON HOW SHE WANTS TO BE REMEMBERED
''I'm going to always look like a cheap whore as long as there's doctors and surgeons in the world. Hopefully, this is the way I'll look when they lay me in my coffin. Somebody better not put me out there without fixing my hair and putting my makeup on.'' — to TV Guide, June 28, 2003

ON WHAT SHE'D SAY TO GOD
''I'm gonna go right up to Him and I'm gonna say, 'I just want to know what you had in mind when you invented Dolly Parton. Do you think that was easy? How could you let a person run around like that? Why did you let me make such a fool of myself all of those years. But I did enjoy it.''' — To PEOPLE, 1984

Thanks a lot. And Dolly Parton's chest, OMFG!

dolly is going to be on american idol tonight and tomorrow

sosgemini said:

Dolly is a SCREAM! A great singer and songwriter too!

Dolly is Amazing

sosgemini said:

Classic. The kinda humour I love.

HamsterHuey said:

My favorite as well..Dolly is the best

raveun2thejoyfantastic said:

Hell yeah!!! And she looks pretty good for someone her age. I wouldn't mind a roll in the haystack with the old girl. Sh!t, we could renact the barnyard scene from Purple Rain.