Victoria Beckham





The history of frothy pop is littered with tone deaf wannabes who've made it big thanks to the wonders of pitch correction technology. Nobody has achieved more pop success without being able to hold a note, it could be argued, than Victoria Beckham; "It became very obvious from the start that I was never going to be the best singer", she recently admitted. Why she decided to air her wobbly, dishwater-thin vocals on a solo album, then, is anybody's guess.


Shaun Ryder





Madchester icon Shaun Ryder is famous for his incoherent, mumbling style of "singing", often derided as "drug-addled gibberish" by his harsher critics. There's no doubt that his unique voice was well-suited to the out-of-it stylings of the baggy scene, but if there's one man you really don't want to spend an evening doing karaoke with, it's Shaun Ryder.


Ozzy Osbourne






Let's be honest - heavy metal has never been about perfect pitch and dulcet tones, and it never will be. Indeed, delve into the abyss of "death" metal and you'll find the very definition of "singing" stretched beyond breaking point. Ageing Ozzy Osbourne gets our vote this time, though: from Black Sabbath's breakthrough, 1970's Paranoid, to his quarter-century solo career, the cuddly Brummie's best attempts at sounding "eerie and menacing" have been about as scary as a cold sponge pudding. And just as tuneful.


Scott Stapp





Scott Stapp, pompous frontman of US rockers Creed, has made a career of apeing the exaggeratedly guttural growlings of Eddie Vedder (Pearl Jam) and Layne Staley (Alice In Chains). In his less capable hands, the distinctive sound of Nineties grunge is distilled into a posturing, self-absorbed musical sludge that's simply torturous to listen to.


Fred Durst




Amongst the many musical crimes committed by nu-metal meatheads Limp Bizkit, the half-rapping-half-singing efforts of tone deaf frontman Fred Durst are surely the most heinous. Whether he's whining about women ("I did it all for the nookie / So you can take that cookie / And stick it up your - yeah!", Nookie) or just talking nonsense ("We downloaded the Shockwave / For all the ladies in the cave / To getcha groove on", My Generation), you can be assured of aural torment.


Florence Foster Jenkins




Proof that people were laughing at self-deluded singers long before the days of reality TV, Florence Foster Jenkins (1868 - 1944) was an American soprano with a voice that could melt concrete. Having inherited a large sum of money, Jenkins was free to pursue her favourite hobby full-time, embarking upon a series of recitals that turned her into a novelty hit with the tittering masses. Unabashed by her audiences' laughter, "the first lady of the sliding scale" continued to massacre operatic classics, once even selling out Carnegie Hall.


William Hung





Like Florence Foster Jenkins, William Hung's uniquely terrible singing voice has transformed him into one of America's biggest novelty sensations. After an endearingly tragic rendition of Ricky Martin's She Bangs on American Idol, Hung developed a cult following, leading to countless TV appearances, advertising deals, a movie role and three album releases. Check him out on YouTube if you're feeling brave.


Yoko Ono





Avant-garde conceptual artiste she may be, but Yoko Ono sure as hell needs some singing lessons. Her distinctive vocal style - sometimes half-spoken, sometimes caterwauled, but always as tuneful as a car alarm choir - has graced countless albums with its experimental ear-bending. What Simon Cowell would make of it we can only imagine.


Akon





Like an annoying ringtone made flesh, Akon's nasal, off-key intonation greets our ears like fingers down a chalkboard. Witness the horror of recent single I Wanna F**k You (tastefully renamed I Wanna Love You for chart release), in which Akon attempts to serenade the ladies with his rhinal whinnyings, convinced of his own sexual allure. A glimpse of hell.


Tiny Tim





Before there was Justin Hawkins of The Darkness, there was Tiny Tim - master of the wavering, glass-cracking falsetto, and novelty sensation extraordinaire. A former street performer, Tim (real name Herbert Khaury) was most famous for his horrifying 1968 rendition of Tip-Toe Through The Tulips, and was once invited to appear on a Beatles fan club record. His inimitable voice is immortalised on the album God Bless Tiny Tim. Listen if you dare.

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Cinnamon234 said:

Her voice is powerful, emotional, humane and real. You're so wrong on this one!

Scott Stapp?

Well, I guess I admit, I don't like him as much without the band.

I like Fred and Yoko.

sexxydancer said:

Cheek said:

akon , annoying but not bad, his voice is quite melodic, especially on his version of "Wanna be starting something". My top 10 in no order

1. Pussy Cat Dolls
2. Limp Bizkit
3. Linkin Park
4, Rhianna
5. All Death Metal
6. Vengaboys
7, Crazy frog
8. Bjork
9. Michael McDonald
10. Spice girls and all spin offs/ solo albums

tane1976 said:

I've heard it said, that 'Sporty Spice' was the only one of the group who could actually sing. Haven't been listening to too much Spice Girls lately so I can't verify that

Oh and Akon is an annoying useless cunt who can't sing

tane1976 said:

Limp Bizkit were awesome.

Cinnamon234 said:

AKON ???

I don't like him, but I've heard FAAAAAR WORST SINGER, don't confuse hating his music and hating his singing ability...

Another nonsensical thread...

Lumidee .

James Blunt
Britney Spears

Honestly...Mick Jagger can't sing.


please don't hurt me
[Edited 3/4/08 6:12am]

I thought Ozzy could sing.

Serious said:

oh SHIT!

even pitch correction couldn't help her ass.

Cheek said:

No she's not. Yoko flat out sucks. That caterwauling makes my ears bleed.

krayzie said:

It's the opposite for me. I like his music. Well, only really his most recent stuff. Anything from the first album and a good part of the second album is crap. But anyway, I like some of his songs, but I can't listen to them because his voice is almost unlistenable.

uPtoWnNY said:

Save your energy for something else.

Cinnie said:

I was surprised nobody had mentioned her yet .

Serious said:

Thankfully she was forgotten as a flash in the pan.

Biz Markie

You.....
You got what I need.....
But you say she just a friend
But you say she just a friend
OH BABY you.....

For me, a good singer is someone who evokes emotions and passion into their voice. It doesn't necessarily mean that they have a great voice. Even some people with good voices get on my nerves occasionally (I'm thinking of Patti Labelle just to name one).

As far as the worst singers go - here's a few I can think of.

Britney Spears
Janet Jackson (very weak)
Spice Girls (mainly Posh)
Bjork

By the way, William Hung is not a singer, he's just a reality show loser.

Ozzy Osbourne was wicked

Cinnie said:

Yeah I thought that must be the reason .

THANK YOU!!!! i thought i was the only one to think that Akon sucks he reminds me of alvin and the chipmunks but they sound better than him

vainandy said:

You're lucky you didn't hear his rendition of "Bennie and the Jets".

I like Ozzy Osbourne and Yoko Ono, c'mon there are worse singers!

raveun2thejoyfantastic said:

Britney Spears

Rhondab said:

I won't hurt you but mick throws down on emotional rescue.