GRAMMY PREDICTIONS
By DARRYL STERDAN -- Sun Media

When it comes to predicting the Grammys, we don't pussyfoot around.

First, we listen to every nominated song and album and rate them individually. Then we quantify their relative merits using a complex algorithm based on sales figures, critical grading, chart position and longevity. Then -- and this is the crucial part -- we throw away all that data, put the nominees list at the bottom of our cat McMurphy's litter box and see who he, um, picks.

Near as we can tell, that's pretty much how the Grammy voters do it. Actually, we suspect they use a poop-flinging monkey, but hey, we have to work with what we've got.

Anyway, here are our predictions for the major categories. If we're wrong, blame McMurphy. After all, he's dumped on everything since Pet Sounds.

RECORD OF THE YEAR
The Nominees
Irreplaceable, Beyonce
The Pretender, Foo Fighters
Umbrella, Rihanna f. Jay-Z
What Goes Around ... Comes Around,
Justin Timberlake
Rehab, Amy Winehouse
Who Should Win
Winehouse's retrotastic ode to the lush life was fittingly addictive -- but these days, it may be too close to the truth for voters.
Who Will Win
In this year's Grammy ball, pop's reigning It Girl Rihanna (who is up for six awards) will be more popular than Cinderella (ella, ella, ella).

ALBUM OF THE YEAR
The Nominees
Echoes, Silence, Patience & Grace, Foo Fighters
These Days, Vince Gill
River: The Joni Letters, Herbie Hancock
Graduation, Kanye West
Back to Black, Amy Winehouse
Who Should Win
Anybody but Hancock. No dis to the Herb, but why the hell is he here instead of Springsteen?
Who Will Win
Kanye -- though we'd love to see him lose just to watch him storm the podium, pitch a fit and steal the trophy.

BEST NEW ARTIST
The Nominees
Feist, Ledisi, Paramore, Taylor Swift, Amy Winehouse
Who Should Win
Much as we wanna fly the flag for homegirl Leslie Feist, Winehouse oughta have a lock on this one.
Who Will Win
Winehouse -- unless Feist's iPod jingle is way more popular than we figured.

BEST ROCK ALBUM
The Nominees
Daughtry, Daughtry
Revival, John Fogerty
Echoes, Silence, Patience & Grace, Foo Fighters
Magic, Bruce Springsteen
Sky Blue Sky, Wilco
Who Should Win
Fogerty, the Foos and Wilco all made damn good records -- but Springsteen made a truly great one.
Who Will Win
Daughtry -- because moronically bad choices are what the Grammys are all about.

BEST POP VOCAL ALBUM
The Nominees
Lost Highway, Bon Jovi
The Reminder, Feist
It Won't Be Soon Before Long, Maroon 5
Memory Almost Full,
Paul McCartney
Back to Black, Amy Winehouse
Who Should Win
If the judging is truly based on vocal talent, Winehouse should take this hands-down.
Who Will Win
Bon Jovi or Maroon 5 (see Daughtry above).

BEST RAP ALBUM
The Nominees
Finding Forever, Common
Kingdom Come, Jay-Z
Hip Hop is Dead, Nas
T.I. vs T.I.P., T.I.
Graduation, Kanye West
Who Should Win
If Jay-Z were up for the superior American Gangster, he might have a chance of stealing this from Kanye.
Who Will Win
West -- and if he doesn't, he damn well oughta storm the podium.

BEST ALTERNATIVE MUSIC ALBUM
The Nominees
Alright, Still..., Lily Allen
Neon Bible, Arcade Fire
Volta, Bjoerk
Wincing the Night Away, The Shins
Icky Thump, The White Stripes
Who Should Win
Arcade Fire and Bjork made the most boldly artistic -- and alternative -- discs in this group.
Who Will Win
The White Stripes -- because they made an album that more Grammy voters probably heard.

Source.

Well one of the most important categories to me tonight will be the Rock Performance category which will see the likes of Mellencamp,Lucinda Williams,and Springsteen as the top 3. But of course this award is being given out before the telecast and will either be run along the bottom of the screen so fast you will miss it, or Solange Knowles will read it and miss pronounce the names.

As for the others, i really dont like to predict this show mainly because they really missed ALOT of music this year, all i will say is, I would LOVE to see Herbie Hancock get it, just to piss off Kanye, plus its Herbie, granted i dont think "a covers" record should be nominate, and i think Mellancamp, McCarntey and Springsteen should have been in this category, but since they arent GO HERBIE!

As for the rest, its pretty meaningless, i do think McCartney is going to get POP Vocal album, mainly because it was one of the best records this year and really needs to be given credit, despite not being a POP record. As for ROCK album if Daughtry wins im blowing up the fuckin place, sorry, but he is the reason that ROCK is dead, well not just him but the fact that he is even in the Rock category is a CRIME, especially in a category against superior artists and music of Wilco and Springsteen, can the grammys say F.U. to the mainstream bull crap already.