wow a clean page. No you don't i'm watching even though i'm way down here.

it's all for you and nothing can stop it unless you want it to. I live in Heaven on Earth so i want to give some of the Joy i got from you back to you freely. No copyright crap this is all yours and no-one elses. I said!!! Oooow that's the me at 5yrs. Willful and too cute. Sang Bobby's girl for the adults no wonder i can cut loose when i'm ott with Joy.

As a prime example of a life lived deliberately i choose to see only the one and only Prince.

Stop the sycophantic drivvle, are u kidding i'm not even in the rhythm yet.

Seriously, the medicine you have for me i have been receiving for 22 years and the 16 year gap is just circumstance and i didn't have a cassette player in the car when i was living rough to find out how it felt. 5 months wasn't long and i had my English Bullterrierr "Bossy" i was safe as houses really.

Funny i can hardly believe it, i was happy that i had the car or they 'housing' would have made me put my best friend down. Oh was she a Bossy or what. Nudge you until she got her own way and we had a soccer game or something, play time was play time.

When did i decide to live deliberately on purpose well listen to all the 11 albums i had covering your work up to Graffiti Bridge. The answer you have already sung about. Did i tell you how grateful i am for you. i am very very grateful and you should be able to feel it anytime you want when i send something in the post. hold it, want it, get it. All yours 22 years of not being able to wipe out the 6 degrees of seperation. Now there's only the 2% good for me. Nice cosy distance to test the grid system of energies to see if they are functioning at the correct frequency.

It's just around the corner, it's just around the block. That i got. Love as solid as a rock and look at you, you still ROCK my socks off. I reckon you and me are hooked into the same Source woo-hoo you too how so cooooool well needs it we got another hot one here.

Why deliberately on purpose because ain't no-one gonna take the rap for messing up but me and no-one else but me.

You don't fall off a horse get kicked in the head with a steel shoe and not wake up wondering a few things. 1973 was cutting edge in medicine for 1973 now i wonder if they would have drilled the skull behind the ear to get the blood clot? So what ringing in the ear? Well it don't bother me much when i've got the noise up LOUD. It is a ticket to the Hall of Records every night if i'm up for it and feeling in the need for some more understanding.

Seek a purpose find a passion. I made a compact with God when i was about 8, Will Be, Will Be - I want the trowth the whole trowth and nothing but the trowth. Even if i don't like it, or especially if i don't like it. I might have shocked God's socks off with that. There was more around the corner. My Earth Father God Bless Him, came to me in a dream to find out what i wanted for my next birthday. I never asked for anything because i knew by 10 what their socio economic status was so i wasn't going to stress them for anything. So looking like a Pharoah, Dad, holding my hand leads me to a balcony and with a sweep of his hand says, "Anything in the world you want you can have." i looked up into his face and said, "All i want is Wisdom." i was small in the dream but every time i recall that i am renewed in a way to not lose sight of why i chose to be here.

This i wrote in 1973 after the accident.

The price you pay is pain and the currency is tears,

It's the penalty for doubts and the punishment for fears,

It doesn't mean a thing that you tried and failed before,

You don't understanc your reasoning and the questions you ignore.

You will learn by your mistakes

Though the cost of which is high

That you only live to Love all you can until you die.

2000 something i added a last verse

Those who know don't doubt this

Their fears were very real

They know against the judgement

There is never an appeal.

No-one would doubt the saddness

Caused by the pain you feel

Just know with time and patience

That your aching heart will heal.

Out of deepest sorrow Joy will suddenly arise

And you'll know the Love within you is by far the greatest prize.

Wonder who brought that out in me do you think aw well, really, you, have i died and gone to Heaven, i never really know anymore. Lovelier still i don't see any need to worry except about you being able to withstand all this, Uncle Dr Phil has a name for it and i have momentarily misplaced the memory. If i ask i will be given it but i think you know what i mean anyway.

Fewer than yesterday, i'm not hexing my chances saying anymore except i feel closer to being a non than i was before. My Mother croaked 12 months after she stopped at 69 i'm doing my best to go a little further so i will keep up the casual stress free decrease slowly, give the little demon a false sense of security by not going in too stoic i don't want to spook the old grey mare more than necessary. I'm eating and sleeping again in the correct patterns except i haven't got the mid day sleep in the make up for the 4.30am rising. I'll keep running on lower revs until i can reinstate that again. Well who said living deliberately on purpose was dull? They aren't living if it is. Who said "He who never made a mistake never made a discovery.", Samuel Smiles, it's on the fridge.

Collecting uplifting and enlightening quotes from a desk calendar daily i told someone you know oooooow they put one from you in, "I imagine what i could do if i could do all i can." Prince. I nearly fell off me chair i was so chuffed to see them quoting you. Well it makes me seem smart for telling everyone i know there isn't any better in the whole world in this Universe.

I think my oldest new friend James got jealous of you. He's too young at 40 and i am not in the market for that. He came all the way from uk to meet me without knowing it.

I called out to the Universe for my Soul mate. Not very politely either. Besides i was teasing God saying see there isn't one made for me. James was God's tease back...

Andrew son took me to the graduation, it was a risk, i would be in the same room as his father, not pleased with the ex. No worries i would spoil that night of nights for me, my Mother and Father and Matthew his brother. Too special. I died to myself to Mother them right and i could die to myself that night. First night out in 11yrs. Ah food, oh gluten! Ne'r mind. Sparkly wine. Oh look out i'm as daft as a brush on half a glass i'm paralytic on two. The wait staff were my best friends that night.

I wasn't conscious of anyone else in the room except my son. The presentation etc. and just the whole experience was a Joy for me. I made sure i said a positive thing to the staff serving because they have enough to put up with. I said God Bless to one girl and thank you in spanish, learnt off tv and her reply was "And God Bless America." well i concurred of course but she couldn't have known i would agree. Minding my own business this young man props over the top and asks are you married. i had to say yes because i am not divorced after seperating in 1990, when i knew i had Karmic clearance to sack him. So i am still married well it stops me making the same mistake again not without significant hassles.

Anyway James had just arrived from the old dart. Not here long and wanting a chat with a long time resident whatever. A young thing like him chatting up an old chook like me are you kidding.

I said,"You've had a bet with someone haven't you?" He's looks half my age.

In front of my ex, my son and his girlfriend, the old chook has pulled a stunner. Well God when You do a thing You don't do it by halves. Me, i'd been on cloud nine for 3 months before this evening and i'd had a dream of a creature coming towards me and i wasn't bothered.Then i got into a state of what can only be called euphoria, i felt it was like being in Love and i wasn't interested in being that except with God it was a real mystery. Then 1st December 2011. Well what do you think of that mmm old girl. I hooked onto him like you wouldn't believe, role model for Andrew. Highly skilled, trained technician further on than Andrew. I'm not letting him wonder if he's going to make it in oz i'm going to aid and abet him at every turn. I've only felt cherished like that by my Father. Long time between drinks. I felt i've known him for eternity well now we are in this part of the globe together and when i meet his new wife i'm going to give her the biggest hug. I love her and appreciate that she too sees James as a good role model.

Honestly,not that it will ever happen because i am estranged from her, Andrew is the pathway. I want James to meet my daughter, Eden must know all Englishmen are not like her Father which is what she may be thinking, well i did until i met James. Shocked my socks off. We keep in touch and i am looking forward to going to their place to meet his wife's children too. Straight up, if my life got any better than this i would die of Joyfullness. It's so good and now the biggest bonus of all You. There isn't any question about you, i see ,i Love what i see, i hear, i Love what i hear and i feel every beat of your heart in it. I'm over the moon you don't come much happier than that not and still be in this carcass.

Living deliberately on purpose brought me here what can i say? What a journey!! Only just started!!
This is bonza. Bonza = Well to me, flaming fantastic. I wouldn't be anyone else for quids. Even my Queen doesn't have it better than this. I get to be private and reclusive. I can go out and no-one knows me i cherish that, i hope you don't find it too intrusive a life you have chosen to give us. i couldn't ever do anything like it. I like solitude too much now. Some very fine qualities arrive with the 6. They all begin with S, Serenity(fizz anytime you want), Sagacity, say anything you want, Simplicity, do what you want,Sanguinity,feel whatever, Spontaneity, so delicious on top of delirious. Serendipity, well you have much to look forward to coz this is better than my 50's by a mile.

All the 9 years are to take stock of your progress todate. I cheat i do the 0 in the 9, well you are not counted to be 1yr for 12 months, you are not 2 for the whole year by ordinary mortals counts i am, in the 9 years since 30, i add on the next year. i was 2yrs the day after my 1st birthday. i've completed the year so i'm into the next one the day after. i was saying i was 60 when my last one was 59, now i'm actually 61 because i've already completed the 60 summers. Next! I'm not in hurry to get there but why mess about with a fact that if you embrace the idea gives you a year in hand. I may do a post about Fuzzy Logic. Surely with scrambled eggs for brains i can do something funny with that. Eg. Why have i smoked all these years? I live on this planet that is under constant pollution wonder what that feels like. I am attuned to the state of Mother and I have had to quit or die. Nothing diagnosed, i'm not waiting for that. I Love You Mother but I can only be of Service to You if i am in this body not out of it so much. Not out of it like that may have sounded i don't do out of body stuff. i am too fond of feeling this Joy. Now if i can give you some of it you can spread more than ever and that is just what i want MORE.

I miss the song "Thunder" i haven't got it back yet and i can't remember which album it was on. Not to worry i am getting all of them sooner or later. Deliberately on purpose because i am missing something else maybe. So many hits and i haven't even heard half of them YET!!!!

Funny one, Andrew son, took me to my favourite shop "Bunnings" i drool in there all those tools and all that material ooow ooow. Anyhoo, there's one of the assistants and she went to your concert in Sydney and my jaw hit the flaw i was in awe!! Jealous couldn't begin to describe it. Lovely woman gently closed my mouth for me, we stir each other up over you whenever we meet. Well it was my birthday and you YOU were here and i wanted to dance to your music so bad i ached for it. I wasn't going to see you i was going to dance to you, LIVE and i couldn't get there and back safely so i stayed home, well i have this saying, "you never know" very Yorky. It's true, we don't ever really do we, Know?

I've got another quote by Kung fu tze (Confusious) "Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance." Ah but I think something was omitted, my belief is "real knowledge is to be grateful for being allowed that ignorance." We don't need to know everything and it leaves room for Spirit to work in your life. Will i find my way back, only if you want me to do so. I am so glad this has been made possible for me Thank You from the bottom of my heart. Now it's water the fertilizer into the veg. pots before the wildlife find it. I got my reward for being good, this, more of this and lookout i'll be so fit i'll be able to do Theives in the Temple twice. Well Love and Light and Joy to you and all who care for you they better do a bloody good job or i'll wanna know why.