obsessed said:

that's not going to be a thread




edits

tony23k said:

You sound so sure about that....
Maybe just to irritate you and Girdle, I'll edit
everything I post, even if it doesn't need it!

Alone in the coffee shop
I gave thought to many things....
the day I let my father down
the day my car rolled into the ditch
the day I screamed at my mother
and ran out the door,
the day my dear friend decided
life was better without me.

It all mingled together
in a mad, mad whirl
none of it making any sense
or so I thought once again.
But think about it I must,
for every time a new light
is shed
coming closer to a closure
on all of these things
and more.

I slowly sipped my coffee
and asked the waitress to refill.
She filled my cup with a smile on her face,
and as my hands surrounded the warmth
and permeated my body
I felt release
and suddenly a pleasure
of all the little things in life...
a crackling fireplace,
a sudden thunderstorm,
a day at the zoo
and meeting new friends.

It's the small joys
of life that have an
amazing effect....

AWwwwww!

California's Burning
I. Tolbert 10/25/07




The flames melted away homes
So many people are scared and probably alone
Their belongings gone forever
Only memoirs to remember

The arsonist killed six
And the mortage now; paying for a couple of sticks
Animals left abandoned
How could one person make this happen?

So many people's lives destroyed
By one person, to make his life joy
What shame what humans can do
To take away the next of life, you arrogant fool.

California's Burning
I. Tolbert 10/25/07




The flames melted away homes
So many people are scared and probably alone
Their belongings gone forever
Only memoirs to remember

The arsonist killed six
And the mortage now; paying for a couple of sticks
Animals left abandoned
How could one person make this happen?

So many people's lives destroyed
By one person, to make his life joy
What shame what humans can do
To take away the next of life, you arrogant fool.

You might just got WTF after reading this
I barely understand it myself...
I just wrote it now barely even edited it...
One of the many works that have condemned me to the first ring of hell

Bodhi Messiah

A stones throw from the hands of eden
I lurk here in this cathedral of souls
Awakened by tampered blood lines
And i feel my skin is not my own
Built up by millennial prophecies
Here i was sentenced to be reborn
And save the tainted jewel of man
from another self righteous war

I tore out these eyes of oblivion
But still i can see the ice and fire
And like the tattered ruins of jerusalem
I fall helpless by your desire
Comfort me with your weathered kiss
have me at the mercy of your wind
For its been two thousand years
And the Rain King has risen

Only you can calm me
Only you can level me with your eyes
Both reborn together
Both die side by side
God is long dead now...
and has left me here all alone
With all these flocks of people
who expect me to bring them home

But i've lost my faith in aquaria
And i curse Paul's lies
Once again bare the crosses?
for the infinite sins of mankind?
Indeed I once was the whirlwind
But i don't know what i am now
I once was the way, the truth the life
I still feel that spiritual shroud

I shall run away to the Sietches
and strip this burden off of me
Have this world spiral into the dark star
Watch the heavens plunge into the sea
Entwined forever with my wayward lover
A flower that has never grew old
All messiahs are doomed to fall
But my skin was never my own

EmbattledWarrior said:

My first guess, is that this is not a pop...

Girdle said:

I have no idea what it is...
Pop doesn't come to mind though

Alone in the coffee shop
I gave thought to many things....
the day I let my father down
the day my car rolled into the ditch
the day I screamed at my mother
and ran out the door,
the day my dear friend decided
life was better without me.

It all mingled together
in a mad, mad whirl
none of it making any sense
or so I thought once again.
But think about it I must,
for every time a new light
is shed
coming closer to a closure
on all of these things
and more.

I slowly sipped my coffee
and asked the waitress to refill.
She filled my cup with a smile on her face,
and as my hands surrounded the warmth
and permeated my body
I felt release
and suddenly a pleasure
of all the little things in life...
a crackling fireplace,
a sudden thunderstorm,
a day at the zoo
and meeting new friends.

It's the small joys
of life that have an
amazing effect....

EmbattledWarrior said:

Maybe if you got yourself Bodhied, you would get over your Messiah complex.
Either way, drop me a postcard from that first ring. I don't think I'll be making that a part of the itinerary, this time around.

Poem isn't autobiographical
I've been bodhi-ed for some time now
i was thinking about calling the poem "The 2nd Coming"
thought it would be way too obvious then

Nice. I completely missed this.
Must have been the bright flames beneath.
I agree, it's the small joys.

Girdle said:

Poem isn't autobiographical
I've been bodhi-ed for some time now
i was thinking about calling the poem "The 2nd Coming"
thought it would be way too obvious then

Girdle said:

EmbattledWarrior said:

2nd?
The way you go on, I thought you'd, at least, be up to the Kingdom.

EmbattledWarrior said:

All I know is that our poetries are complete opposite styles...
we're most definitely in parallel universes.... lol
But that's what makes the world go round...

obsessed said:

Thats like saying my Tao is different than your tao?
Poetry is poetry
Their are no styles...
If you try to explain poetry, you're wrong...
You criticize it you're wrong,
poetry is eternal meaningful and meaningless words...
Its to be felt , not to be understood

Girdle said:

nah nah lol
this one has a certain theme...
a Mixture of futurist christianity witth buddhist themes...
Setting: Jesus was reborn, by genetic blood line stuff, in a futuristic world, to "save" the world again
but he awakens... and decides not too
I'm thinking about turning it into a story

EmbattledWarrior said:

Doesn't this post contradict your post above, a little?
I agree that the words and tones and rhythms and the abstract nature of that all, can be enough, but for other poems, it's all about the meaning. Like with music and painting and all art...each piece is different. Sometimes the most important part is the message, and that it be understood.

EmbattledWarrior said:

That's kind of interesting.
So was he awakened in a lab? How were the bloodlines tampered with?
Was he sentenced? If so who sentenced him?
Are you saying he failed the first time?

Girdle said:

nah not really, you try to extract any type of meaning out of something T.S. Eliot, Sylvia Plath or even Poe wrote, and you'll drive yourself crazy...
usually its basically whats imbedded within the poem that theirs meaning, only accessible to primal emotions.
Which for everyone is different...
Poetry that's easy to understand, is never good in my opinion, never was a fan of Dr. Seuss lol
The poetry and painting analogy is great.
In my opinion it's the art that is obscure thats the best, i'm a big fan of impressionism, i love monet, Van Gogh, Da Vinci during his blue period...
for a person to try to extract meaning out of those paintings is like squeezing juice out of a rock. Meaningless.
You'll never be able to tap into that intellectual wave length that gave the artist the impulse to create it. You can possibly feel what they're feeling...
If it makes you feel sad, than perhaps they were sad if you're confused by it, maybe they were confused etc...
Each interpretation will be different.
Poetry is like that (except for story-telling poetry, thats when the meaning is key of the story)
One of my favorite poems is called El Viaje Definitivo (The Definitive Journey) by Juan Ramon Jimenez
It goes like this (First in spanish , than i'll give you an english translation)

El Viaje Definitivo

... Y yo me iré. Y se quedarán los pájaros cantando;
y se quedará mi huerto, con su verde árbol,
y con su pozo blanco.
Todas las tardes, el cielo será azul y plácido;
y tocarán, como esta tarde están tocando,
las campanas del campanario.
Se morirán aquellos que me amaron;
y el pueblo se hará nuevo cada año.
Y yo me iré; y estaré solo, sin hogar, sin árbol
Verde, sin pozo blanco,
Sin cielo azul y plácido...

"The Definitive Journey"

..and I will leave. But the birds will stay, singing:
and my garden will stay, with it's green tree, with its water well.

Many afternoons the sky will be calm and blue,
and the bells in the belfry will chime, as they are chiming this very afternoon.

The people who have loved me will pass away,
and the town will burst anew every year,
and in the secret corners of my flowery garden
my spirit will wander,
nostalgic.

I've taken alot of english/poetry classes that have tried to dissect and examine that short simple poem..., and their conclusions don't even scratch the surface of the true meaning, which is something indescribable...
I've felt it, but i can't find the proper words other than the poem itself to explain it...
An attempt to describe it and analyze is futile...
either you feel it or you don't.
In fact actually trying to explain it goes against the nature of the poem itself
It wasn't written to be decoded,
It was written to express something that isn't easily expressable

Girdle said:

I'm playing with that motif that he was chemically recreated...
Like using recovered DNA, I think that would be the perfect 2nd coming, in this technological world, and easily fathomable
The tampered bloodlines thing has to do with a theory that there was an esoteric jewish breeding program to create the jewish messiah "Emannuelle"
The davidic king., whom jesus supposedly was the result
In a way he was kind of sentenced to be killed, by prophecy...
And the notion that he failed comes from, direct tranlsation of the old testement, the torah.
Jesus, was suppose to unite the 12 tribes of israel and rule over them his diciples(12 diciples:12 tribes, who were also his brothers) and a priest (John the baptist, his cousin) to rule the world.
Royal family style...
Jesus and his entourage failed...
John got beheaded, Jesus got crucified, and his brothers were hunted down and killed eventually...
Thus the prohphecy never came true, so he failed...

Now Jesus is brought back to finish the job and bring peace...
he reads over the past two years, the updated copy of the bible, realized everything he taught wasn't even in the so called sacred book. And the meaning got distorted. During that the world is in chaos. world war e like, and need him to bring peace
But he reaches nirvana when he finds out about the bloodline thing, and the true reason for him being there is basically for control over the world. Questions the existence of his so called father,
Would he once again be the sacrifical lamb?

the 2nd plot is with the love thing...
i'm toying with the notion that Mary Magdelene too was reborn along with other cats in his entourage,
So instead of saving the world Jesus runs into the desert and spends it with Mary...
The whole thing is a potential story i'm considering writing
It's blasphemous on all levels, christian, jewish, islamic,
but i find it intruiging...
I'm a big religious buff...

EmbattledWarrior said:

I think the Jesus-Mary story was done.

The other, though interesting, has a flaw.
If he's a sacrificial lamb and he came knowing that...and was then sacrificed, doesn't that mean he succeeded. Wouldn't failing be him backing out? Especially since, he easily could have.