So I was posting over on an idiot board about writing lyrics and thought about hey - let's do a lyrics clinic where we all write lyrics and compare our progress and maybe we all write a bunch of great songs all at once!

Just a thought.

Here's the task. Jimmy Webb's book "Tunesmith" has a great chapter on lyrics - hell half the book is about lyrics, but this one chapter gives the basics of it. Combine that with Steven King's "On Writing" about writing stories in general, and wow, you've got the tools for some great writing.

I'll start with Steven King's basics, since, without the story, there's not much to write about.

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STEVEN KING: ON WRITING:

Take a basic common story, boy meets girl, guy buys car, dog runs away from home, and then take one or two things that are alien to that story and try to introduce them into the story, so then you've created a story that stands out.

It's best to write about what you know, so, try to keep the basic concept close to something that you've got enough experience to be able to put realistic pieces into that story.

Got that? Take a basic story, add some very unlikely things to it. (like, say, a guy gets a speeding ticket, bribes his way out, the cop is a hot female... okay then, there you go).

-----
JIMMY WEBB: TUNESMITH:

Take a clean sheet of paper. Write the topic of the song/story at the top, in as few words as possible, so you've just got the CORE of the story. ("superhot lady cop: she's a freak").

Next - don't start writing lyrics yet - just write out the events of the story (which you already did with the Steven King part, right?) and write out as much as you can. These aren't the lyrics, these are the ideas that are going into the lyrics, and even if the song is only 16 lines total, you want to have a LOT to pull from, so when you're writing the real lyrics, you'll have more than enough detail for your lyrics.

Next - now that you've got your story, the developments in the story, the characters, the mood, motivation, etc, start putting some lines on the page. NOT in the final order, but just write out some lines that you think would work good in the song - capturing the mood and feeling of your song. ("nice set of guns...", "caught me going 69", "if the paddywagon's rockin, don't come knockin") you get the idea. You're not yet working on rhymes, patterns, lines - nothing, just phrases or hooks that you'd like to see in your lyrics.

NOW: take those lines and put them in an order that fits the song, and THEN start crafting your lyrics around them. At this point, you've done a lot of set up on the lyrics - thinking out the story/concept, writing non-lyrics that talk about the basics of the song, writing real lyrics but not forcing the rhymes yet, so at this point, the song could almost write itself - you're just filling in the spaces where you don't have lines written yet.

=====

Okay then, does anybody want to join me on this? Let's write some lyrics. I haven't written a song since "Can I Get Some Lovin" so I'm jonesing for some new songs. I just thought maybe we could make this like a class, where we all come up with ideas for songs, and then each of us pursues our own songs, but we display the process listed above. This is just one song. Nobody needs to worry about lyric theft or stolen songs - well - if you ARE worried about that, then I wouldn't suggest doing this. If I write something and it turns up on your record, whatever, it's just this one song, this is like working out in the gym.

Wanna do it? Interested?

I want to write an anti-war song. My son will be 18 in 2 months. So there's the basic topic of my song.
[Edited 10/19/05 10:27am]

Yeah, I'll bite. It might force me to finish some shit that I start.

Creative writing projects are awesome, I'm in. Do we want to do it on this thread? Are you thinking maybe everyone contributes to an original idea or people critique what's been written?


I need to put my mind to this and flush out some ideas this weekend.

Cool idea and why didn't you contribute to that "madhouse" thread? Y'bastid.

New office arrangement prevents me from camping out at Prince.org anymore, so I have to swoop in during the day, fire off a message or two, and then jump out. On the weekends, I'm herding cats - er - raising baby boys, so I barely have the time now.

Shame, I would love to get in on it.

beauhall said:

I know at my day job, we've moved from three towers to a smaller one floor office so I lost my personal office because they are very limited.

Yep. you guessed it. I'M IN CUBE WORLD! AHHHHH!!!

I swear, it's enough to make me want to go find another job. I honestly can't stand it. On top of that, I'm right next to the legal department where you would think you are in a library. Always shushing me. Hey! I'm the multi-media /video guy! I'm supposed to be LOUD! I've asked that everyone please report me to their managers so maybe, just maybe I'll get my office back.

It's tougher to get on here with that purple logo on my screen in full view of a sea of somewhere of about 350 other cubes. They are the ones that are short too so you can see everyone. Damn corporate cut-backs!

Ewww cublicles. You should just pitch them the old I'd be much more creative and productive working your projects from my own studio (at home). What do you need to be there for anyway?

Red said:

Crazy little thing called cash.

Red said:

Actually I have. MY DEPARTMENT (marketing) is totally cool with it, however the VP of Human Resources seems to have a problem with it and he has to sign off on that request. I get a chance to do it now from time to time and man do I love it when I do get that chance. I get more done in a half day at the studio than I do all week at the office.

There is really only one problem with that and it's really a small one in my opinion and that is I update our website often and the development server is in India and they are very strict in going through the company network for that function. You can do it under a citrix environment, (not compatible with the MAC as far as I know) but that could be solved with a cheap PC or laptop. I don't really need the MAC to do web changes meaning code changes don't need a lot of processor power and all nor the multitude of software I use on the MAC.

Everything else (Video and multi-media) is all local on my mac and external hard drives. They have only recently given us web-mail access, so that's not a problem anymore.

Back on topic: I'm going to do this assignment. My wedding anniversary is right around the corner and I think I'll write her a song and do the artwork by hand. I don't write music that often, but when I do, she's asked a few times why I have never written anything for her.

Well ... I can't sing! I'll be the first to admit that. So I think I'll do a slow jam instrumental then speak some personal words over the music. I think I can get that right. Yep. That sounds like a plan.

With her, I'm not allowed to buy her anything. Since I'm supposed to be the creative type, she prefers that I make her something every year. Unfortunately, around when we first met, she stumbled across my old portfolio and saw some photos of drawings and things I did for some ex-girlfriends and I'm sure she wants to see more of that side of Kelly tward her. I did that stuff when I was so broke that I couldn't even take a girl out to a movie. A little creative charm was about all I had going for me. It's a little harder to do these days when your working your arse off around the clock. Still ... no excuse. That's part of my job as a husband to keep the romance flowing, right? She's totally worth it. Awesome mother and wife, not to mention all my entrepreneur crap she puts up with especially when so many late hours don't always exactly pay dollars. Tough to ballance all that I'm learning.

It really doesn't matter what I could or would buy as long as it comes with something I made with my own two hands. She says she likes it better when I buy her things outside of holidays and such. I can relate. When she makes me gifts and when my son helps her, those little things are so priceless. She's bought me an expensive watch that I never wear, so I get it.

I'll be cracking on this tonight. If it starts going south as in too sappy or just downright , I'll rewrite it as a comedy sketch type of thing.

Ok, here goes ... My pen is out of ink, so I'm going to do this right here, right now ... I'll probably jot down a lot of personal stuff and won't make much "who ha" to anyone but me and her so bare with me. I'm going to go with the flow you outlined Beau. I'll start with the story and work on the lyrics afterward.

Richest Man I Know You've Made Me Step one.

Step two.
That's how I feel. I've put on some old James Brown ballads to set the tempo of how I want to say this. (music wise) "Doing the Best I Can" from the album "The Payback" is on right now. Something inspired me earlier last week with that one. I'm diggin the backing vocals to accent the story that is being told as well as the mellowness that allowed so much space for what was being said. A lot of minimal percussion that wasn't so intrusive from today's R&B.

Alright, I'm ready.

I met you on the rebound from an on and off relationship that went on for 7 years. You showed me how a man is supposed to be treated that I honestly didn't think existed in this day and age. My father and best friend since diapers died within the same year. My mentor, my brother and my lover had all left me. I was very lonely, reckless and heartbroken. Working my ass off to pay the debts my father left behind. Life honestly meant nothing to me anymore. For everyone else around me, life was just starting. Why am I being pulled back?

I went to a little country church on my 21st birthday on a whim when everyone else I knew would have paid their first legal visit to a bar. Someone told me to hand it over to Jesus. Ok. Take it, I can't bare it! And F-U for creating this world that I would have to witness and bare all that I have to begin with! It took me a few years to really understand how to let it all go. I was a very angry soul. I could have stayed right there with some of the fourty something year old peers and waited for my ship to come in. It was time to put that 8 year era to an end. My God, what if I did stay put in that mindset? Probably an early heart atack. I've seen it happen.

I used to tell my co-workers all the time that I was going out of the country to find a bride. Young American girls (in my mind) were all jaded and trouble. It seemed by the time they got themselves together (relationship wise) they had a kid or two and had been around the block too many times that by the time a date with me occured I was nothing but a number and too many walls to break down. Why all the hustle? Dad always said it was in my DNA to be a family man. The way I saw it, it's all in the upbringing. "If I ever had children, they'd know better" I'd always say.

Florida sucked. Hot, hot and more hot. AND, I worked in a kitchen. I actually thought I wanted to be chef. Never really happy though. Me, my kitchen (I did the day shift by myself and expodited with 5 others at night) and my Prince CD's and that was about it. Every frickin' day. I did however, enjoy the sunrises at the beach. I would picture God himself coming off the horizion to tell me where I should go next. I am so glad I stayed that day. I had prayed for you for a long time. That God would reveal to me my future wife. I would see you in my dreams. All I could recall the next day was that you were my size and blond. I always went for the brunetes before you.

You were "kinda plain" at first glance behind those glasses of yours. Once you took them off, your eyes burnt such an impression into my soul. I had to look into them all the time. What was it in the Bible somewhere? "A rare and precious jewel? Yep. There you were.

I met you at a cross road in my life. That day I was to sign up for the peacecore or the military. Which ever line was the shortest, I guess. Just let the wind blow me anywhere but there and then.

Answered prayer? Well there you were. Bold, I was. "Want to go for a ride?" and I could not believe you got into my car. Off we went and spent such a beautiful day toghether. Just like that. 10-20 minutes of introducition was it? I had an agenda that was blazing like a wild fire to start anew that day. As afraid as I was, I kissed you that night and knew right then and there that my life HAD JUST THEN BEGAN. Nothing else mattered. The past was buried that day and I don't think I ever felt truly free as I did that day. I really let it all go, didn't I? I'm such a stubborn SOB.

You had just only moved to Florida two weeks prior. Ah, here's a girl who has not yet set any roots into the clubs, bars and all that predominant single girl horseshit that I've been swinging from vine to vine and back to the "other, original vine" I swang from to begin with when I got here.

I was going to live or die that day, I swear. Maybe not die that day, but deffinatly go another road that would not have been so pretty and as full of joy as you have made for me today. The next night under the fireworks in that Banyan tree only confirmed it. I never felt more welcome as your family made me feel when I met them that next day. That was really cool. It was like my own family when things were in balance. I really felt at home and wow, did I miss it.

I was just starting to put this "studio thing" together as a favor and to take up some time, but started finding myself and all my dreams coming together. It was you that talked me into persuing it professionally when I thought I was a long shot away from being ready. Well ... I marched right into that office with my junk portfolio and they took me in. The pay doubled as well as the workload and learning hours, and there I found a passion for craft. Thank you, baby. I don't think I would have moved forward if you had not dared me.

I always asked you what it was you wanted to do with your life. You always replied "To be a good mother". To this day, that still moves me. What other 18 year old girl would say that?

Now this society today encourages us to get our own thing together individually AND THEN start the whole marriage and family thang. You knew what you wanted in life and I just found my own direction. Why not get the ball rolling together?

And so we did ...

Funny how we almost called it quits right before we said "I do". This thing called union takes work to keep it strong. We both had to accept it. I'm so happy we did. I borrowed a lyric from Ingrid Chavez and made it my own in our wedding vows that read: "Today we build a house together and I'll paint it with your smile because Lord knows it's my favorite color". I can say and build off that line a thousand times because it's so true. I've become a "good man" only because someone like you has allowed me to be.

Not many men can say they are truly happy.
Not many men can say they have no regrets.
Not many men can say they live each day to it's fullest.
Not many men can say they are with "The Most Beautiful Girl in the World"

Not many men can say they are the richest man they know. I can. Because I have you.

~sigh~

This afternoon brought out two songs. Music that is. One I'm going to try to sing. The other is a back up that I will speak over. They are both completely different. I'm going to start on the lyrics now.

My Favorite Color (Song Two)

A poor lonely painter I was. Your Love gave me confidence to grow.
There was only so much I could paint when all I had was blue.
Now I can honestly say I'm the richest man I know.
Yeah, the richest man I know ... Because I have you.

Not many men can say they are truly happy with their life.
Not many men can say they have "The Most Beautiful Girls in the World" as both their daughter and their wife.

With God as our foundation.
United with our children this house stands tall.
Our little prince and princess, a son and daughter, King and Queen, you and I, we are a nation.
They say behind every good man is a woman, I guess I'll never fall.

Your Love gives me strength to walk that extra mile.
Your heart so pure, I'll never find another
The richest man I am to wake up to your smile
Because Lord knows it's my favorite color.

The Richest Man I Know (Song One) If I don't butcher it with my singing.

3:30 in the morning
I've worked all I could stand.
Didn't pull in much money
But baby I'm doing the best I can.

Leaving you alone at home with the kids
Working all day and all through the night.
Missing out on so much so I can pay our way
I'm not sure if it's wrong or if its right.

Such a lonely ride home,
no one on the road but me
Spinning my wheels in circles
That's what it feels like as far as I can see.

4 am, sneaking in the door
I sit next to our son and wonder what he did today.
I watch him laugh in his dreams,
I want to wake him up and play.

I see baby girl is outgrowing her crib
Seems like only yesterday I could hold her in one hand.
I feel like I missing out on my own life
But I guess I'm only just one man.

Yes. I'm just a man
But baby I'm doing the best I can.
There's got to be a better plan
It takes everthing I got just to stand.

As I slip into bed I see you in the moonlight
My God you look so fine.
I give you the softest kiss goodnight
I swear, you taste sweeter than the finest wine.

I thank God for you and my family
But this is getting lonely night after night.
I don't know how long I can keep it up
3, 2, 1 like that, I'm out like a light.

6:30 in the morning, I hear someone say "Daddy"
I open my eyes to see three of the sweetest smiles.
It doesn't take but a moment to be reminded
That for you I'd walk a million miles.

Now before I go to work, there's something I got to say
Our dreams are still coming true even though it seems so slow.
I might not have a dollar in my pocket to give you today
But know this, I'm the richest man I know.

Ok, don't laugh too much or puke for that matter: http://kellymcclain.net/M...eColor.mp3

(First Cover)
I need to get a pre-amp for that MAC so I can use a good mic on it. The other song "Richest Man I Know" seems like I'm going to have to do a lot of revision and reherse it a whole buch before I even try to record those vocals not to mention find some sort of character in my voice to actually atempt to sing it myself.

Here are the lyrics: http://kellymcclain.net/G...Inside.jpg

yamomma said:

Kelly! This is great! I like song 1 as well. I haven't listened but the words are so sweet. Very touching. She's going to love it!

VinaBlue said:

When I woke up this morning, she was all smiles. I guess she played it right when she woke up. So it's all good!

Here's the music to the other song. A very rough cut at that. I'll come back to that one when I'm ready.

http://kellymcclain.net/R...nIKnow.mp3

Damn bro, I go awol for five days and you become Shakespeare.

beauhall said:

It's all in the inspiration. She's cool like that. Thanks for taking the time to give me the idea in the first place!

yamomma said:

I said a very loud cuss word when I first heard this. But just know that the particular word is synonymous with I like My Favorite Color too, but the music and vibe of this one put a lump in my throat.

psykosoul said:

Dude! that means the "f*ck me runnin' up and down sideways" holy sh*t to me coming from you. By the way, that's a good thang!

Thanks!

I'll have to finish it now won't I?
Maybe in time for the holidays.
Kelly