Thanks everybody for your replies. I'm too embarrassed to leave this up. I feel much better now. I will try to eat more sensibly and buy a month's supply of vitamins on Payday.
[This message was edited Mon Mar 29 8:12:09 2004 by BinaryJustin]

u


have


us



never


truly


alone







.
[This message was edited Sun Mar 28 13:23:32 2004 by shausler]

Aaw, Binary.

I've been where you're at. Admittedly when I was young and settling in Copenhagen after having left my hometown. I never had any money at the end of the month. One time I didn't eat for a week. Thankfully I've learned to balance my account better with age. I think my mother got pretty tired of me calling her up, "ma, I don't have any money".

Apart from that, it sounds like you're having a depression. I know the feeling of standing underneath the shower for an hour. I get depressed once in awhile, too. But you work your way throught it. Even when it looks really dark. Because there is no alternative.

Just take the days one day at a time and try not to worry too much. Of course you're not ugly. I think you're one of the best people on the Org.

keep your head up BJ, there is more to life than work...get out and meet people.
Your essay has a tone of desperation...and, quite frankly, i don't know how to react
to it. Good luck...you'll be in my prayers tonight.

Hang in there and u know where u can find me

Thanks for your replies. I'm going to try and get some sleep.

Justin. x

Eat 3 times a day and take a vitamin suplement as well as additional b-12. You're slowing your metabolism down by only eating once a day, and you're probabbly not getting enough vitamins and other good stuff, which can cause bad fatigue.

I was in between jobs a couple summers ago, and totally broke. Also, I got into a huge argument with my circle of friends, so I wasn't talking to any of them. I was bored out of my mind and feeling like crap.

For the hell of it, I made a little challenge to myself to see how much I could do each day without spending hardly anything. Thats when I found out our local libraries all have CDs that you can check out for a few days, so I got all kinds of free music. Then I went to a bunch of art galleries around cleveland, pittsburgh, and akron. All it cost me was toll and gas. I spent alot of time at the park, or walking around town taking pictures, anything creative. I also took advantage of my free time to re-write my resume and put together a kickass portfolio.

Take advantage of the free time to reorganize.

Hey, sweetie. I know exactly what you're going through. I've been depressed a lot, especially lately, and I know how it feels to feel like you're completely alone. If you ever need to talk to someone who understands, I'm here for ya! You can send me a message anytime! I hope you feel better soon!

My heart aches for you (truly). I have experienced very, very similar feelings/thoughts in the last 5 years or so, and I'm finding that the solution lies in a combination of taking care of the physical along with the emotional, and that positive, healthy ACTIONS lead to me to positive, healthy THOUGHTS/FEELINGS. It's a circle....

Tom is right--you're slowing your metabolism down by eating only once per day. Your body thinks it's being starved, so it's storing fat. Eat small, frequent meals throughout the day. And start MOVING--walk as much as possible. Get some natural light--preferably sunlight, but even being outside on a cloudy day is better than indoor lighting. Your body needs sunlight to produce vitamin D, and natural light has been shown to help tremendously with mood.

Go to the doctor and have them do some blood tests to make sure your thyroid or iron isn't out of whack.....

And as a few others have said--if you need to talk, orgnote.

I've been there my friend. I'm still there some days