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'NANA's UNIVERSAL DUMPING LETTER Dont say I never help u guys out! 
Just cut, paste, print, sign and send - simple, fast easy! All 4 only $9:99 - s&h is free if u order before the end of March 2004. Drop that ball and chain, free yo'self! Dear _____, I AM CHUCKING YOU BECAUSE: (tick as appropriate) I never really loved you - it was just infatuation... Your dick's too small for anything permenant... I can't spend the rest of my life with a man hung like a squirrel... You're just not good enough in bed... I've only been going out with you to hide my biker boyfriend from my parents... I decided it just wasn't fair to keep cheating on you any longer... I'm sick of all of my friends laughing at me... I finally found out what I've been missing... You really should have bought me that car when I asked for it... I've discovered God and I now know that it's immoral to go out with someone purely for their money... I'm bored with you - you're a prick, now fuck off... I've become allergic to greasy little prats... I know that you love me more than life itself, but I've decided I want to give up my body to lots and lots of other men and have one-night stands and sleep with gorgeous Italian studs and Spanish waiters who mean absolutely nothing to me on holiday - just so you can't ever hear 'Livin' La Vida Loca' or 'La Isla Bonita' again without doubling up in pain, and then give my all to painters, decorators and mechanics to whom I'm less than dirt just for kicks and then...well, I think you've got the picture... Your best friend showed me what deep, passionate and sweaty physical love between two people was all about... I love you, but you haven't got a Porsche so this is goodbye... I've got to get out now before you put me off of all men for life... (NOT) Yours, _____ PS: DON'T YOU DARE DO ANY OF THE FOLLOWING: * Come 'round... * Phone me... * 'Accidentally' bump into me... * Go sobbing to my best friend, hoping he'll put in a good word for you... * Try the same routine on my parents... * Tell me you're going to kill yourself - because I don't have an IQ under fifty... * Promise me:'things will be different next time...' * Tell everyone that you chucked me, because I told them all what I was going to do a month ago... * Tell all your mates that I was actually useless in bed, as they all know that's not true... [This message was edited Mon Mar 15 15:38:28 2004 by bananacologne] | |
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god i hate being single  Space for sale... | |
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sosgemini said: god i hate being single
god i love being single  | |
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God I love Kraft American Cheese singles. ~ I'D BUY THAT FOR A DOLLAR ~
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I have to go feed my cats. | |
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Handclapsfingasnapz said: sosgemini said: god i hate being single
god i love being single slut!! Space for sale... | |
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HobbesLeCute said: God I love Kraft American Cheese singles.
slut!!! Space for sale... | |
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Anxiety said: I have to go feed my cats.
slut!!!! Space for sale... | |
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sosgemini said: HobbesLeCute said: God I love Kraft American Cheese singles.
slut!!! You say that like it's a bad thing! Life as a cheese slut is astounding. ~ I'D BUY THAT FOR A DOLLAR ~
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sosgemini said: Anxiety said: I have to go feed my cats.
slut!!!! Well, it's a goal of mine, anyway. | |
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Me too  | |
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Dear Lleena,
I AM CHUCKING YOU BECAUSE: I'm sick of all of my friends laughing at me... (NOT) Yours, Althom PS: DON'T YOU DARE DO ANY OF THE FOLLOWING: * Come 'round... * Phone me... * 'Accidentally' bump into me... * Go sobbing to my best friend, hoping he'll put in a good word for you... * Try the same routine on my parents... * Tell me you're going to kill yourself - because I don't have an IQ under fifty... * Promise me:'things will be different next time...' * Tell everyone that you chucked me, because I told them all what I was going to do a month ago... * Tell all your mates that I was actually useless in bed, as they all know that's not true... | |
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sosgemini said: Anxiety said: I have to go feed my cats.
slut!!!! :ikeslap: | |
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Handclapsfingasnapz said: sosgemini said: slut!!!! :ikeslap:  | |
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Anxiety said: Handclapsfingasnapz said: :ikeslap: huh?  | |
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Handclapsfingasnapz said: Anxiety said: huh?  Space for sale... | |
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   In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular. |
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Dear Althom,
I AM CHUCKING YOU BECAUSE: BKW is the man and I am  of you
I never really loved you - it was just infatuation...  
I'm sick of all of my friends laughing at me...  dumbass
I finally found out what I've been missing... It was 2the9s You really should have bought me that bling bling when I asked for it... I've discovered Satan and I now know that this is the right thing to do cause he and the voices in my head told me so..... Your best friend showed me what deep, passionate and sweaty physical love between two people was all about... 
I love you, but you haven't got a Escalade with phat rims and a play station 2 so this is goodbye... I've got to get out now before you put me off of all men for life... (NOT) Yours, Jessica PS: DON'T YOU DARE DO ANY OF THE FOLLOWING: * Come 'round... * Phone me... * 'Accidentally' bump into me... * Go sobbing to my best friend, hoping he'll put in a good word for you... * Try the same routine on my parents... * Tell me you're going to kill yourself - because I don't have an IQ under fifty... * Promise me:'things will be different next time...' * Tell everyone that you chucked me, because I told them all what I was going to do a month ago... * Tell all your mates that I was actually useless in bed, as they all know that's not true... | |
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althom said: Dear Lleena,
I AM CHUCKING YOU BECAUSE: I'm sick of all of my friends laughing at me... (NOT) Yours, Althom PS: DON'T YOU DARE DO ANY OF THE FOLLOWING: * Come 'round... * Phone me... * 'Accidentally' bump into me... * Go sobbing to my best friend, hoping he'll put in a good word for you... * Try the same routine on my parents... * Tell me you're going to kill yourself - because I don't have an IQ under fifty... * Promise me:'things will be different next time...' * Tell everyone that you chucked me, because I told them all what I was going to do a month ago... * Tell all your mates that I was actually useless in bed, as they all know that's not true... Dear althom I AM CHUCKING YOU BECAUSE: I can't spend the rest of my life with a man hung like a squirrel... I've got to get out now before you put me off of all men for life... (NOT) Yours, Lleena _____ PS: DON'T YOU DARE DO ANY OF THE FOLLOWING: * Promise me:'things will be different next time...' | |
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 | |
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 When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. | |
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 | |
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althom said: Althom  Jess | |
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MostBeautifulGrlNTheWorld said: althom said: Althom JessJess  althom | |
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althom said: MostBeautifulGrlNTheWorld said: Althom JessJess althom | |
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MostBeautifulGrlNTheWorld said: althom said: Jess althom | |
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althom said: MostBeautifulGrlNTheWorld said:  | |
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MostBeautifulGrlNTheWorld said: althom said: | |
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althom said: MostBeautifulGrlNTheWorld said:  | |
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MostBeautifulGrlNTheWorld said: althom said:  | |
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