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Printablethis thread reminds me of the time Lleena and AnotherLoverToo were on their way to meet Althom, 2the9s and bkw for drinks. it was a dark and stormy night, of course, and because they were already running late Lleena put the pedal to the metal sending their van hurtling down the road through the darkness, keeping it real and on time. the last time she and Another were late meeting the guys, bkw and 2the9s had gotten even by inflating their portable girlfriends and when lleena and Another finally did show up (a somewhat soused) bkw had treated them to an impromptu lecture on the virtues of timeliness and insisted all the seats at the table were taken. Althom found some extra chairs and saved the day, but that's another story.
as the van sped over the top of a hill on the curving road lleena and Another saw the figure of a man outlined in the headlights, barely visible through the rain. 'watch out!' Another cried as lleena stomped the brake. AnotherLover braced herself and the van screamed into a skid, sliding and bumping across the asphalt. its tires tangoing tempestuously with the slick asphalt as it swerved past the man in the road. 'whew' lleena muttered when the van came to a stop, staring at the silhouette of the man still standing there, motionless, in the road. 'odd the way he's isn't moving, don't you think?' 'i don't know,' AnotherLover replied, 'he might need our help.' slowly, cautiously, lleena backed the van up, rolled down the window and asked 'are you okay, mister?' the man nodded slowly. 'do you need help? a ride somewhere?' lleena offered. without a word the man walked over, opened the back door to the van and climbed inside. lleena and AnotherLoved looked at each lother, shrugged, and lleena pulled back onto the road, watching their passenger in the rear view mirror. 'we're going as far as chattanooga, mister. we'll drop you off there, if that's okay.' his features were hard to discern in the darkness, but he was wearing a soiled white tuxedo that gleamed dully through from the back seat. lleena squinted thoughfully at his disfigured left cheek, wondering what kind of misfortune had befallen the fellow that he'd ended up alone on foot a county road at night. maybe his car had broken down. perhaps he spoke only french. the only thing lleena knew for sure was that the scar on his cheek must have hurt a lot when it was being made. the ride to chattanooga was uneventful after that and when they arrived lleena and AnotherLover decided to stop for food at the local diner and call ahead from a pay phone to let Althom know they'd be late and ask him to save them a seat, no matter what. the man followed them inside and stood behind them by the door as they waited in line for the pay phone, but when lleena hung up and looked around she couldn't see him anywhere. AnotherLover had been nearby in the restroom freshening up and when she returned she was as mystified as lleena. lleena decided to ask a passing waitress for clarification 'say, have you seen a guy in a white tuxedo around ehre recently? he came in with us?" all conversation around them ceased, the only sound a ringing clatter in the back of the room as someone dropped their spoon. the waitress turned white as old whiskers and the plates in her hand chattered like teeth. 'a man in a white tux? you saw him here?' 'he came in with us, we picked him up by the roadside a few miles back, gave him a ride.' AnotherLover explained. 'you couldn't have done that. you couldn't have.' the waitress backed a step away from them, lifting a butter knife defensively. 'it ain't so. you couldn't have. you lie.' an old man in a checked shirt put in, 'now just calm down emma lou.' the waitress' eyes twitched an accusation at lleena as she cried, 'but they says they seen jimmy!' the old man ventured a light touch, 'i hear what she say emma lou, but you just calm down now. it wasn't jimmy. couldn't have been jimmy. you know that well as i do. jimmy's long dead' 'did he have a scar on his left cheek, then? well did he?' emma lou's voice was little more than a tortured gasp. just then the door to the men's room flew open and haystack walked out, his white tux shining ghostly in the flickering neon light of the daily special sign over the counter. 'hi honey, i'm home,' he giggled, eyes narrowing to blood red points of light. emma lou dropped the plates she was holding in a terrified lurch away from him. 'glad to see me baby?' haystack grinned mirthlessly at emma lou and the ropy scar on his left cheek twisted his lip upward in a sneer. someone screamed, someone shouted, chaos erupted, the lights went out and lleena and Another made for the exit like shooting stars, out the door, back to the van and let's-not-wait-around-to-see-what-happens next here in weirdtown. and the good news was they weren't terribly late for their hook-up with the guys. 2the9s saved them some beer, althom made them tiny origami place settings out of beer bottle wrappers and bkw had not only saved them seats, but had in fact cleared the entire bar out by programming the karaoke mcahine to play barry manilow's 'copacabana' for two solid hours. that's what i heard anyway  | |
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XxAxX said: this thread reminds me of the time Lleena and AnotherLoverToo were on their way to meet Althom, 2the9s and bkw for drinks. it was a dark and stormy night, of course, and because they were already running late Lleena put the pedal to the metal sending their van hurtling down the road through the darkness, keeping it real and on time. the last time she and Another were late meeting the guys, bkw and 2the9s had gotten even by inflating their portable girlfriends and when lleena and Another finally did show up (a somewhat soused) bkw had treated them to an impromptu lecture on the virtues of timeliness and insisted all the seats at the table were taken. Althom found some extra chairs and saved the day, but that's another story.
as the van sped over the top of a hill on the curving road lleena and Another saw the figure of a man outlined in the headlights, barely visible through the rain. 'watch out!' Another cried as lleena stomped the brake. AnotherLover braced herself and the van screamed into a skid, sliding and bumping across the asphalt. its tires tangoing tempestuously with the slick asphalt as it swerved past the man in the road. 'whew' lleena muttered when the van came to a stop, staring at the silhouette of the man still standing there, motionless, in the road. 'odd the way he's isn't moving, don't you think?' 'i don't know,' AnotherLover replied, 'he might need our help.' slowly, cautiously, lleena backed the van up, rolled down the window and asked 'are you okay, mister?' the man nodded slowly. 'do you need help? a ride somewhere?' lleena offered. without a word the man walked over, opened the back door to the van and climbed inside. lleena and AnotherLoved looked at each lother, shrugged, and lleena pulled back onto the road, watching their passenger in the rear view mirror. 'we're going as far as chattanooga, mister. we'll drop you off there, if that's okay.' his features were hard to discern in the darkness, but he was wearing a soiled white tuxedo that gleamed dully through from the back seat. lleena squinted thoughfully at his disfigured left cheek, wondering what kind of misfortune had befallen the fellow that he'd ended up alone on foot a county road at night. maybe his car had broken down. perhaps he spoke only french. the only thing lleena knew for sure was that the scar on his cheek must have hurt a lot when it was being made. the ride to chattanooga was uneventful after that and when they arrived lleena and AnotherLover decided to stop for food at the local diner and call ahead from a pay phone to let Althom know they'd be late and ask him to save them a seat, no matter what. the man followed them inside and stood behind them by the door as they waited in line for the pay phone, but when lleena hung up and looked around she couldn't see him anywhere. AnotherLover had been nearby in the restroom freshening up and when she returned she was as mystified as lleena. lleena decided to ask a passing waitress for clarification 'say, have you seen a guy in a white tuxedo around ehre recently? he came in with us?" all conversation around them ceased, the only sound a ringing clatter in the back of the room as someone dropped their spoon. the waitress turned white as old whiskers and the plates in her hand chattered like teeth. 'a man in a white tux? you saw him here?' 'he came in with us, we picked him up by the roadside a few miles back, gave him a ride.' AnotherLover explained. 'you couldn't have done that. you couldn't have.' the waitress backed a step away from them, lifting a butter knife defensively. 'it ain't so. you couldn't have. you lie.' an old man in a checked shirt put in, 'now just calm down emma lou.' the waitress' eyes twitched an accusation at lleena as she cried, 'but they says they seen jimmy!' the old man ventured a light touch, 'i hear what she say emma lou, but you just calm down now. it wasn't jimmy. couldn't have been jimmy. you know that well as i do. jimmy's long dead' 'did he have a scar on his left cheek, then? well did he?' emma lou's voice was little more than a tortured gasp. just then the door to the men's room flew open and haystack walked out, his white tux shining ghostly in the flickering neon light of the daily special sign over the counter. 'hi honey, i'm home,' he giggled, eyes narrowing to blood red points of light. emma lou dropped the plates she was holding in a terrified lurch away from him. 'glad to see me baby?' haystack grinned mirthlessly at emma lou and the ropy scar on his left cheek twisted his lip upward in a sneer. someone screamed, someone shouted, chaos erupted, the lights went out and lleena and Another made for the exit like shooting stars, out the door, back to the van and let's-not-wait-around-to-see-what-happens next here in weirdtown. and the good news was they weren't terribly late for their hook-up with the guys. 2the9s saved them some beer, althom made them tiny origami place settings out of beer bottle wrappers and bkw had not only saved them seats, but had in fact cleared the entire bar out by programming the karaoke mcahine to play barry manilow's 'copacabana' for two solid hours. that's what i heard anyway  | |
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Thanks Haystack  I am printing this and putting it on my fridge.
Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture! REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince "I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben |
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Haystack said: luv4u said: That thought crossed my mind too  luv4u had just purchased a donut and a Sprite and was sitting in a food court in her local mall reading a newspaper. After a few minutes, some punky looking guy came and sat on the other side of her table. She wasn't paying much attention for a few moments, however she looked up and noticed, with surprise, that he'd picked up the donut and was boldy eating it seemingly without caring. She wanted to say something, but got the impression that this punky man might make a bit of a scene, so she kept quiet. But then, once he'd finished the donut, he picked up the Sprite and started to drink that down, and in the most uncouth fashion, too. By now, luv4u was getting totally pissed off. She tried to contain her anger, but couldn't. She didn't give a fuck whether this punk made a scene or not. She looked directly into the punk's eyes and said 'I don't know what the fuck you think you're doing, but people like you really get on my fucking nerves! You think that just because I'm a woman that I'm going to be scared of you and not going to stand up for myself when you steal my stuff? People like you shouldn't be allowed on the fucking street, asshole!' The punky guy looked surprised, himself. He stood up and walked away as quickly as possible without saying a word. Feeling proud for standing up for herself, luv4u folded up her newspaper and decided to leave. It was only then that she saw that her donut and Sprite were still there, untouched underneath where her newspaper had been. Was that punky guy you?????
Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture! REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince "I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben |
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Haystack said: doctormcmeekle said: Funny that, I heard you had your ribs removed so you could suck Cloudbuster's cock? Now I'm confused?  No, I had my sanity removed after I sucked Cloudbuster's tiny cock. The memory of the let-down was so great, I went totally mental. I'm better now, though...           girafffe's are sexy but not adaptable to cold climates  zebra   tits LMAO! | |
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