i was watching Dr.Phil the other day and they where talking about these ladies who had issues and been objectified by the standards of beauty


One lady was a black woman who was fed up with black men and only dated white guys (y'all should've watched it).


Then there was this other lady who was ignored by men most of her life because she was fat. Then She lost over 150 lbs and men started 2 pay attention. The only difference was she was pissed off that men was paying attention 2 her just cuz she lost of a lot of weight. She was the exact same person, with the same heart, the same mind, the only difference is she was 150 lbs lighter and fed up that men only noticed her when she looked better, she wouldn’t date a man, because she was afraid he only wanted her for her body and not who she really was, which I could most definitely relate to.



Now with these ladies in mind, I can understand where they’re coming from. Especially the lady who had issues of black men who only wanted to date white women. Of course they tried to make her feel as if she was a sinister character for her beliefs and experiences she had with black men, but in a funny way I could most definitely relate to where she was coming from. I was thinking I wish Dr. Phil could come 2 this forum and see the kind of damage some y’all try 2 cause by always having negative comments. If it wasn't for people like some of you, Dr. Phill wouldn't have a job.

I also could relate to the lady who lost weight, because in this society it doesn’t matter who are in the inside, people will try to make you feel less then person if you don’t live up 2 the certain standard of beauty. Yes I've been on both sides of the road.

This is exactly why racism still exist today in this country. People are so busy judging just by mere appearance, they don’t want to take their time in trying to get to know who you are. As far as I’m concern if a person only wants me for what I look like and don’t want to get what’s inside of mind, fuck them. I don't want 2 be bothered with them anyway. I know they only have one thing in their mind which ass , ass and mo ass.


Let me tell y’all something as fine as Prince is, if he was a complete asshole I seriously would not date him, if I had my chance. I don’t care who he is , who he’s been with or how much money he makes, I would not date Prince based upon looks alone. If I met Ruben Studdered and he was a complete sweetheart , I would seriously date him and have a relationship with him. See I’ve been on both sides of the plate and I’m glad I did. I know for fact some people only want you based upon your looks, the only difference with that is they don’t really want you , they just want your ass and to that I say fuck them.


I said one day I was going to give myself a complete make over. I’m going to go to the gym and get me a new wardrobe, some celicone, you know make myself a complete dyme. the only difference with me is, I’m not going to be the black women who now only wants to date white men, because of the rejection. When I get myself 2gether and be hella fine, I’m going to only date white women and where a t shirt that sayz fuck men, then laugh at all the guys who could've had me then but was to busy judging me based upon physical apperance alone, on that note i'm out y'all. I got some work 2 do can somebody say YMCA !




re-edit
[This message was edited Sat Mar 6 7:27:43 2004 by DigitalLisa]

this is not bitter ... it's light hearted.

I'm not a angry person i just know what I've to do.



light-hearted edit
[This message was edited Sat Mar 6 6:35:24 2004 by DigitalLisa]

okay y'all it's edited you all can reply now

Sometimes, it's not the weight -- it's what some people project. I've known some fine, heavier women who projected nothing but beauty and confidence. I've known others who projected a more negative vibe. Maybe it was weight-related. Maybe it was deeper.

But, honestly, this isn't exclusive to weight. I've found the same problem among women who felt they weren't approached because of their degrees or high-paying job. Turned out it was neither -- it was what they exuded. Sometimes a person can wear insecurity like clothing. If you're comfortable with yourself and love who you are, it will shine through. That sort of light attracts positive people.

Like you say, if folks didn't have issues, Dr. Phil wouldn't have a job. The more comfortable and supportive we are with ourselves, the fewer issues we'll have about whether people accept us. That kind of validation becomes irrelevant. Then we won't have to write off segments or a population based on the wrongs we feel they've caused us.

ThreadBare said:

couldnt've said it any better myself...