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PrintableAnotherLoverToo said: SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: AnotherLoverToo said: I guess I cringe at these types of threads, because so many people don't realize that situations like yours are really the norm. Instead, they hear stories (which probably leave out lots of key details, like how much the private school they decided to put the kid in costs, etc.) and make assumptions that most situations are like that.
And soon it all turns into a woman-bashing, marriage-bashing, "women use the child support to get their nails done instead of diapers", free for all. A bit like EWM's post, for example. His next thing will probably be to talk about how women always cry and get out of speeding tickets, and how they all sleep their way to the top of the company they work in, and how it's ok for a man to sleep around but not a woman because it's 'natural'. But those things are all true  
I hear ya. I guess I just had a short nerve on this issue today. My case is certainly more the norm than not but I'd be pissed as hell if I made my fortune through my blood, sweat and tears and then had to give it all away because I signed a marriage certificate...especially if I was willing to stay in the marriage. The only reason I support gay marriage BTW is so that we have the same rights as far as all the civil implications. Otherwise I'm not for getting married myself. Well, as a non-married female who supports herself, obviously golddiggers have NO PLACE in my heart. But I also tend to think that these rich guys often make the decision to marry a golddigger knowingly, trading their money for the looks and homemaking comforts of a wife they knew was superficial to begin with. In those cases, they're both assholes, lol. Well then I guess they do deserve to get ripped off. See what a fresh perspective can do? 
I just love to see Golddiggers get what they deserve...nothing! 2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740 | |
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EvilWhiteMale said: It's really a fucked up system. I knew a woman who was engaged to a doctor and got pissed off when he asked for a pre-nup. Meanwhile she was planning an affair with me. She wasn't in love with him and she found him old and boring. I was just looking to get some ass so i stayed quiet, but in my mind I really wanted to tell her how much of a cunt she was being. It's no wonder most men are afraid of marriage, we have a 50% chance of getting fucked royally. As a society I think it's time for us to put an end to this theft. It's seriously time for a campaign.
Did you get any money out of her? Ὅσον ζῇς φαίνου
μηδὲν ὅλως σὺ λυποῦ πρὸς ὀλίγον ἐστὶ τὸ ζῆν τὸ τέλος ὁ χρόνος ἀπαιτεῖ.” | |
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: AnotherLoverToo said: SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: AnotherLoverToo said: I guess I cringe at these types of threads, because so many people don't realize that situations like yours are really the norm. Instead, they hear stories (which probably leave out lots of key details, like how much the private school they decided to put the kid in costs, etc.) and make assumptions that most situations are like that.
And soon it all turns into a woman-bashing, marriage-bashing, "women use the child support to get their nails done instead of diapers", free for all. A bit like EWM's post, for example. His next thing will probably be to talk about how women always cry and get out of speeding tickets, and how they all sleep their way to the top of the company they work in, and how it's ok for a man to sleep around but not a woman because it's 'natural'. But those things are all true
I hear ya. I guess I just had a short nerve on this issue today. My case is certainly more the norm than not but I'd be pissed as hell if I made my fortune through my blood, sweat and tears and then had to give it all away because I signed a marriage certificate...especially if I was willing to stay in the marriage. The only reason I support gay marriage BTW is so that we have the same rights as far as all the civil implications. Otherwise I'm not for getting married myself. Well, as a non-married female who supports herself, obviously golddiggers have NO PLACE in my heart. But I also tend to think that these rich guys often make the decision to marry a golddigger knowingly, trading their money for the looks and homemaking comforts of a wife they knew was superficial to begin with. In those cases, they're both assholes, lol. Well then I guess they do deserve to get ripped off. See what a fresh perspective can do?
I just love to see Golddiggers get what they deserve...nothing! This thread is reminding me of the Coen Bros movie, with George Clooney and Catherine Zeta Jones (Intolerable Creulty, I think it was). It was excellent! CZJ plays a woman out for revenge via golddigging, while George plays an attorney who has concocted the perfect pre-nuptial agreement. They go head to head, and of course end up falling in love...with some twists and turns along the way. Great dark humor, great acting. | |
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EvilWhiteMale said: It's really a fucked up system. I knew a woman who was engaged to a doctor and got pissed off when he asked for a pre-nup. Meanwhile she was planning an affair with me. She wasn't in love with him and she found him old and boring. I was just looking to get some ass so i stayed quiet, but in my mind I really wanted to tell her how much of a cunt she was being. It's no wonder most men are afraid of marriage, we have a 50% chance of getting fucked royally. As a society I think it's time for us to put an end to this theft. It's seriously time for a campaign.
This is why some guys have no room to complain. You were willing to have a relationship with that bitch knowing what a bitch she is. If the shoe were on the otherfoot what would you think of the young guy then? 2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740 | |
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: EvilWhiteMale said: It's really a fucked up system. I knew a woman who was engaged to a doctor and got pissed off when he asked for a pre-nup. Meanwhile she was planning an affair with me. She wasn't in love with him and she found him old and boring. I was just looking to get some ass so i stayed quiet, but in my mind I really wanted to tell her how much of a cunt she was being. It's no wonder most men are afraid of marriage, we have a 50% chance of getting fucked royally. As a society I think it's time for us to put an end to this theft. It's seriously time for a campaign.
This is why some guys have no room to complain. You were willing to have a relationship with that bitch knowing what a bitch she is. If the shoe were on the otherfoot what would you think of the young guy then? I was just thinking that--somehow he thinks his morality is more pure than hers. As long as he gets to tap that ass, it doesn't matter what she's like, though. Like I've always said: you are no better than who you fuck. | |
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I'm glad Anotherlover cleared things up a little on this thread (as per normal).
It is more unusual for the woman to end up the winner in reality. Some of those wacky celebrity breakups make it seem normal. In Australia divorce is a "no-fault" thing so whether one party was the cause of the break up is unimportant and immaterial. When there was formerly a fault system years ago it wa utterly chaotic with blame and accusation etc flying left, right and centre. They wisely removed that element. If a woman has given up her career to look after children while the hubby brings home the dough, why isnt she enititled (and the children) to be looked after when there is divorce? she has arguably contributed equally to the circumstances of her families income. By the way, the law does not differentiate between men and woman so if a woman earns all the dough whilst the mans stays home then the law should also assist him. . [This message was edited Wed Jan 21 20:25:51 PST 2004 by bkw] When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. | |
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I'm worried about your sudden concern for heterosexual issues. You haven't been to Vegas recently, right? | |
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Aerogram said: I'm worried about your sudden concern for heterosexual issues. You haven't been to Vegas recently, right?
 | |
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Unless... this is all some kind of reflexion for your upcoming marriage in Canada, where gay men can marry! | |
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Lammastide said: Did you get any money out of her?
Nah, we never even got together. We met once and then talked on the phone a few times. Our schedules made it tough to get together. "You need people like me so you can point your fuckin' fingers and say, "That's the bad guy." "
Al Pacino- Scarface | |
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: This is why some guys have no room to complain. You were willing to have a relationship with that bitch knowing what a bitch she is.
A relationship? Where'd you get that from? I'd rather say it a booty call type of thang. She was a few years older than me anyway. Believe me, an actual relationship was the furthest thing from my mind. If the shoe were on the otherfoot what would you think of the young guy then? If you're referring to how I'd feel if I were her fiance and I found out she was cheating, I'd put all the blame on her. The guy is just trying to get some ass, that's all. He's not a friend of mine or anything. "You need people like me so you can point your fuckin' fingers and say, "That's the bad guy." "
Al Pacino- Scarface | |
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AnotherLoverToo said: I was just thinking that--somehow he thinks his morality is more pure than hers. As long as he gets to tap that ass, it doesn't matter what she's like, though.
Like I've always said: you are no better than who you fuck. Yeah yeah yeah 
We were just two adults lookin to have some fun, that's all. I think we're getting off topic here. "You need people like me so you can point your fuckin' fingers and say, "That's the bad guy." "
Al Pacino- Scarface | |
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If the day comes that I do ever get married and I for some reason get a divorce, I do not expect anything that is not mine already. I don't really want it unless I earned it in someway. It ain't mine I ain't takin it. | |
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If I ever get a divorce, I am leaving and my wife will never find me.
I think I would live the decadent life in Vegas. | |
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Because breakups are usually bitter. And it is about who can get what from whom, and what Kamille said..
Some people are very, very nasty. I have seen it all with my boyfriend and his ex... It is truly sad. ^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect, it means you've decided to look beyond the imperfections... unknown | |
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Let me reitterate...I have no problem with divorce settlements that come out equally in favor of women who have contributed to their households by raising children and having a home the husband wants to come home to. That isn't my beef.
My beef is with marriages that don't have a considerable amount of time invested yet the man has to fork over half of his hard work. It is such a horrid contract. No one in their right mind would ever enter into such a contract if it didn't involve sex and love... 2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740 | |
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EvilWhiteMale said: It's really a fucked up system. I knew a woman who was engaged to a doctor and got pissed off when he asked for a pre-nup. Meanwhile she was planning an affair with me. She wasn't in love with him and she found him old and boring. I was just looking to get some ass so i stayed quiet, but in my mind I really wanted to tell her how much of a cunt she was being. It's no wonder most men are afraid of marriage, we have a 50% chance of getting fucked royally. As a society I think it's time for us to put an end to this theft. It's seriously time for a campaign.
Gee someone sounds bitter.. Get over it already..
Anotherlover said it best.. your no better than who you fuck! The day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom - Anais Nin
"Unnecessary giggling"...  | |
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: Why should a man have to subside on 10% of his income so that he could pay hand over fist ridiculous amounts of child support that do not merit the actual costs that the children are incurring?
i agree with everything you said up to this point...maybe it works differently in other countries but here (in Canada) i only receive $226 per month for my son...even 1/2 the cost of raising a child is way more than that. this is not even close to 90% of my ex's earnings. i'm barely scraping by with putting a roof over his head, the cost of feeding 2 instead of one and daycare. not to mention paying for his activities, medical, dental, school supplies and the fact he is growing so quickly i have to replace his entire wardrobe every 3 months. i do not believe in alimony but child support is a different story.  you're only as old as you feel..............so how old do i feel 
Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants. | |
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lillith said: SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: Why should a man have to subside on 10% of his income so that he could pay hand over fist ridiculous amounts of child support that do not merit the actual costs that the children are incurring?
i agree with everything you said up to this point...maybe it works differently in other countries but here (in Canada) i only receive $226 per month for my son...even 1/2 the cost of raising a child is way more than that. this is not even close to 90% of my ex's earnings. i'm barely scraping by with putting a roof over his head, the cost of feeding 2 instead of one and daycare. not to mention paying for his activities, medical, dental, school supplies and the fact he is growing so quickly i have to replace his entire wardrobe every 3 months. i do not believe in alimony but child support is a different story. Believe me I know full well the cost of kids. I'm not at all disputing the fact that men should pay child support. I know of guys who have gotten fleeced by the courts to pay so much more for support in relation to how much they are making. If Illimack's boyfriends child support was $600 a month and went up to $1,200 per month. I'm wondering why it doubled. $1,200 a month is about half the average persons monthly income. Sure kids can cost that much but this dude would be paying $2,400 for 2 kids. There is so much that is justified but there is also so much that is wrong... 2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740 | |
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: lillith said: SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: Why should a man have to subside on 10% of his income so that he could pay hand over fist ridiculous amounts of child support that do not merit the actual costs that the children are incurring?
i agree with everything you said up to this point...maybe it works differently in other countries but here (in Canada) i only receive $226 per month for my son...even 1/2 the cost of raising a child is way more than that. this is not even close to 90% of my ex's earnings. i'm barely scraping by with putting a roof over his head, the cost of feeding 2 instead of one and daycare. not to mention paying for his activities, medical, dental, school supplies and the fact he is growing so quickly i have to replace his entire wardrobe every 3 months. i do not believe in alimony but child support is a different story. Believe me I know full well the cost of kids. I'm not at all disputing the fact that men should pay child support. I know of guys who have gotten fleeced by the courts to pay so much more for support in relation to how much they are making. If Illimack's boyfriends child support was $600 a month and went up to $1,200 per month. I'm wondering why it doubled. $1,200 a month is about half the average persons monthly income. Sure kids can cost that much but this dude would be paying $2,400 for 2 kids. There is so much that is justified but there is also so much that is wrong... i was just speaking of my own situation...not anyone elses...i have no idea why illimacks boyfriend is paying $1200 a month...i do believe that is a little excessive however i don't know if he makes $40,000.00 a year or $400,000.00. i am just saying that i don't believe i should have had to fight with my ex with lawyers and the court for well over a year just to get him to contribute to raising his son. i am sure there are many 'guys who have been fleeced' and there are women (using the term loosely) who take advantage and attempt to benefit in terms of alimony and child support. i just took offense to the generalization of your original statement. i work my ass off to try and support my child...the small amount of child support i receive is well appreciated and is put to good use in clothing/feeding/taking care of Brendan and is absolutely necessary to keep my head above water. i apologize if I offended you in anyway with my comment...this was not my intent, i do not know you. this is just a topic that gets under my skin and hits very close to home. you're only as old as you feel..............so how old do i feel
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lillith said: SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: lillith said: SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: Why should a man have to subside on 10% of his income so that he could pay hand over fist ridiculous amounts of child support that do not merit the actual costs that the children are incurring?
i agree with everything you said up to this point...maybe it works differently in other countries but here (in Canada) i only receive $226 per month for my son...even 1/2 the cost of raising a child is way more than that. this is not even close to 90% of my ex's earnings. i'm barely scraping by with putting a roof over his head, the cost of feeding 2 instead of one and daycare. not to mention paying for his activities, medical, dental, school supplies and the fact he is growing so quickly i have to replace his entire wardrobe every 3 months. i do not believe in alimony but child support is a different story. Believe me I know full well the cost of kids. I'm not at all disputing the fact that men should pay child support. I know of guys who have gotten fleeced by the courts to pay so much more for support in relation to how much they are making. If Illimack's boyfriends child support was $600 a month and went up to $1,200 per month. I'm wondering why it doubled. $1,200 a month is about half the average persons monthly income. Sure kids can cost that much but this dude would be paying $2,400 for 2 kids. There is so much that is justified but there is also so much that is wrong... i was just speaking of my own situation...not anyone elses...i have no idea why illimacks boyfriend is paying $1200 a month...i do believe that is a little excessive however i don't know if he makes $40,000.00 a year or $400,000.00. i am just saying that i don't believe i should have had to fight with my ex with lawyers and the court for well over a year just to get him to contribute to raising his son. i am sure there are many 'guys who have been fleeced' and there are women (using the term loosely) who take advantage and attempt to benefit in terms of alimony and child support. i just took offense to the generalization of your original statement. i work my ass off to try and support my child...the small amount of child support i receive is well appreciated and is put to good use in clothing/feeding/taking care of Brendan and is absolutely necessary to keep my head above water. i apologize if [color=red:9cc4312164:7155285aa0]I offended you in anyway with my comment...this was not my intent, i do not know you. this is just a topic that gets under my skin and hits very close to home. Well I hope I didn't offend you. Anyone who knows me on this board knows I'm on chicks side 95% of the time. I'm gay, can't legally get married and don't want kids. My post in no way was meant for mothers like you. Believe that. I was just addressing this from a guys point of view. And I was addressing it from the point of view where the 2 people don't have lots of time invested in the marriage and I was addressing why ex wives need to be supported for the rest of their lives, even like in the case of the radio host where his wife cheated on him, divorced him, was making a great living as a financial advisor and still the guy had to fork over half his pay for 3 years (that's the same amount of time they were married). That just is so wrong and it makes no sense. 2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740 | |
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I hear you.  Hi.
Supa, this is a bit off topic...but, it was mentioned to me that I should pay support to my ex, because my daughter lives with him on most weekends. It was looked upon as too "crazy" to legally enforce, however I kinda do it anyways. She's my daughter. 
Are there men (and women) who have the primary custody and care of their children, and yet still pay child support? (Supa, this is way off topic, yes?)... 
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SHANNA said: I hear you.
Hi.
Supa, this is a bit off topic...but, it was mentioned to me that I should pay support to my ex, because my daughter lives with him on most weekends. It was looked upon as too "crazy" to legally enforce, however I kinda do it anyways. She's my daughter.
Are there men (and women) who have the primary custody and care of their children, and yet still pay child support? (Supa, this is way off topic, yes?)...
I'm not really sure. I've not heard of that. My opinion is that both parents bear the resposibility of raising their children. It seems odd to pay child support if you are the main caregiver the majority of the time. In this case, and I'm not saying this because I know you, the father should bear his part of raising your daughter which includes him taking the financial responsibilities for her when she is in his care. I'm assuming he is capable of providing for her care without your assistance... Maybe this all boils down to evil lawyers and which ones can figure out the best game for their clients... . [This message was edited Thu Jan 22 12:04:19 PST 2004 by SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy] 2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740 | |
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: SHANNA said: I hear you.
Hi.
Supa, this is a bit off topic...but, it was mentioned to me that I should pay support to my ex, because my daughter lives with him on most weekends. It was looked upon as too "crazy" to legally enforce, however I kinda do it anyways. She's my daughter.
Are there men (and women) who have the primary custody and care of their children, and yet still pay child support? (Supa, this is way off topic, yes?)...
I'm not really sure. I've not heard of that. My opinion is that both parents bear the resposibility of raising their children. It seems odd to pay child support if you are the main caregiver the majority of the time. In this case, and I'm not saying this because I know you, the father should bear his part of raising your daughter which includes him taking the financial responsibilities for her when she is in his care. Maybe this all boils down to evil lawyers and which ones can figure out the best game for their clients...  ...And, I kept thinking to myself: How do I say "No" towards whatever I can do to help to care for my daughter. Which is why I agreed to "share" with my ex.
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: Well I hope I didn't offend you. Anyone who knows me on this board knows I'm on chicks side 95% of the time. I'm gay, can't legally get married and don't want kids. My post in no way was meant for mothers like you. Believe that. I was just addressing this from a guys point of view. And I was addressing it from the point of view where the 2 people don't have lots of time invested in the marriage and I was addressing why ex wives need to be supported for the rest of their lives, even like in the case of the radio host where his wife cheated on him, divorced him, was making a great living as a financial advisor and still the guy had to fork over half his pay for 3 years (that's the same amount of time they were married). That just is so wrong and it makes no sense. no offense taken. 
its actually nice to see some intellectual debates going on on this site...not just 'who wants to sleep with who' and other bullshit topics (which don't get me wrong are fun and all but sometimes i wanna talk, ya know??) you seem like a very informative and intelligent man... and ps- ya ever want to get married...come visit me here in Canada...i'll hook ya up. you're only as old as you feel..............so how old do i feel
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: Let me reitterate...I have no problem with divorce settlements that come out equally in favor of women who have contributed to their households by raising children and having a home the husband wants to come home to. That isn't my beef.
My beef is with marriages that don't have a considerable amount of time invested yet the man has to fork over half of his hard work. It is such a horrid contract. No one in their right mind would ever enter into such a contract if it didn't involve sex and love... I believe it's half his/her hard work performed during their union. Of course, laws differs according to jurisdiction. Here, if one of the partners bought a property before the union, the other does not get half the property. Basically, there's not much money to part with for either of the partners of a former couple that stayed together for a relatively short period, did not buy significant property while they were together and are not together the parent of a child. The only thing would be for one partner to pay half of the difference in income between the former spouses. If both were working and making fairly comparable salaries, there's not much cash coming out of that. If one of them stayed at home keeping house, making diner, etc., it's more money but remember... only for the time they were together. Maybe California laws are radically different. I don't believe most laws overwhelming favor women when it comes to money. When it comes to who gets the children... that's another story. | |
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