Author | Message |
Share and Enjoy "Share and Enjoy" is, of course, the company motto of the hugely successful Sirius Cybernetics Corporation Complaints division, which now covers the major land masses of three medium sized planets and is the only part of the Corporation to have shown a consistent profit in recent years.
The motto stands - or rather stood - in three mile high illuminated letters near the Complaints Department spaceport on Eadrax - "Share and Enjoy". Unfortunately its weight was such that shortly after it was erected, the ground beneath the letters caved in and they dropped for nearly half their length through the underground offices of many talented young complaints executives - now deceased. The protruding upper halves of the letters now appear, in the local language, to read "Go stick your head in a pig", and are no longer illuminated, except at times of special celebration. At these times of special celebration a choir of robots sing the company song "Share and Enjoy". Unfortunately - again - another of the computing errors for which the company is justly famous means that the robot's voices are exactly a flattened fifth out of tune and the result sounds something like this, only slightly worse. The lyrics to the company song are as follows: Share and Enjoy Share and Enjoy Journey through life With a plastic boy Or Girl by your side Let your pal be your guide And when it breaks down Or starts to annoy Or grinds when it moves And gives you no joy Cos it's eaten your hat Or had sex with your cat Bled oil on your floor Or ripped off your door You get to the point You can't stand any more Bring it to us, we won't give a fig We'll tell you, 'Go stick your head in a pig'. (I wish I had an audio link for the "Share and Enjoy" song--it sounds horrible! :LOL:) Fear is the mind-killer. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
see...you a freak baby THE UNOFFICIAL ORG SEX THERAPIST
the original org kisser...:K: proud member of the 4F | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Teller...have I missed something? I dont get it.
Please elnlighten me oh...enlightened one | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
bananacologne said: Teller...have I missed something? I dont get it.
Please elnlighten me oh...enlightened one This is one of my favorite passages from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. It's much better read aloud, and sung by the actual robots, but I thought I'd share it with you anyway. Enjoy! Fear is the mind-killer. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
teller said: bananacologne said: Teller...have I missed something? I dont get it.
Please elnlighten me oh...enlightened one This is one of my favorite passages from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. It's much better read aloud, and sung by the actual robots, but I thought I'd share it with you anyway. Enjoy! OH...MY...GOD. I should be SO ashamed 4 not knowing that... 2 make up 4 my faux-pas, I'll post the following (one of my fave parts of the book) Disaster Area Disaster Area, a plutonium rock band from the Gagrakacka Mind Zones, are generally held to be not only the loudest rock band in the Galaxy, but in fact the loudest noise of any kind at all. Regular concert goers judge that the best sound balance is usually to be heard from within large concrete bunkers some thirty-seven miles from the stage, while the musicians themselves play their instruments by remote control from within a heavily insulated spaceship which stays in orbit around the planet - or more frequently around a completely different planet. Their songs are on the whole very simple and mostly follow the familiar theme of boy-being meets girl-being under a silvery moon which then explodes for no adequately explored reason. Many worlds have now banned their act altogether, sometimes for artistic reasons, but most commonly because the band's public address system contravenes local strategic arms limitations treaties. This has not, however, stopped their earnings from pushing back the boundaries of pure hypermathematics, and their chief research accountant has recently been appointed Professor of Neomathematics at the University of Maximegalon, in recognition of both his General and his Special Theories of Disaster Area Tax returns, in which he proves that the whole fabric of the space-time continuum is not merely curved, it is in fact totally bent. PS: U may like this Teller: www.xcalibur.co.uk/games/hitchhik.html | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Bananacologne Fear is the mind-killer. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Vogon poetry
Vogon poetry is of course, the third worst in the universe. The second worst is that of the Asgoths of Crea. During a recitation by their poetmaster Grunthos the Flatulent of his poem "Ode to a Small Lump of Green Putty I Found in my Armpit One Midsummer Morning" four of his audience died of internal haemorrhaging and the president of the mid-galactic Arts Knobbling Council survived only by gnawing one of his own legs off. Grunthos was reported to have been "disappointed" by the poem's reception, and was about to embark on a reading of his 12-book epic entitled "My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles" when his own major intestine, in a desperate attempt to save humanity, leapt straight up through his neck and throttled his brain. The very worst poetry of all perished along with its creator, Paul Neil Milne Johnstone of Redbridge, in the destruction of the planet Earth. Vogon poetry is mild by comparison. :LOL: Fear is the mind-killer. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Arthur Dent in his dressing gown | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
god i would love thwe series on dvd or vcd... iv'e read the book several times seen the series a few times, but never had a copy of my owwwn... where doesth thou findeth one...
"shouldnt we put newpapers over our heads?... you could... would it help?... NO!!" | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Finess said: god i would love thwe series on dvd or vcd... iv'e read the book several times seen the series a few times, but never had a copy of my owwwn... where doesth thou findeth one...
"shouldnt we put newpapers over our heads?... you could... would it help?... NO!!" The DVD is now available! I strongly recommend the radio show as well, as it seems more complete, and has parts the books do not. I must have listened to it hundreds of times... Fear is the mind-killer. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
teller said: Finess said: god i would love thwe series on dvd or vcd... iv'e read the book several times seen the series a few times, but never had a copy of my owwwn... where doesth thou findeth one...
"shouldnt we put newpapers over our heads?... you could... would it help?... NO!!" The DVD is now available! I strongly recommend the radio show as well, as it seems more complete, and has parts the books do not. I must have listened to it hundreds of times... i have the leatherbound book with so long and thanks for all the fish and resturant at the end of the universe... man its funny stuff.it really really is.. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
The Hitchhiker's Guide is more than just some silly shit to me...kind of like Monty Python, it is a bridge to that subtle thing we know as the "British Sense of Humour." I have always had a fondness for it...
I have always had a fondness for all good humor. Fear is the mind-killer. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
teller said: The Hitchhiker's Guide is more than just some silly shit to me...kind of like Monty Python, it is a bridge to that subtle thing we know as the "British Sense of Humour." I have always had a fondness for it...
I have always had a fondness for all good humor. i never said it was "silly" i love British Humour always have. [This message was edited Fri Oct 24 15:49:39 PDT 2003 by Finess] | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Moderator | The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular. |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Fear is the mind-killer. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Maaaybe my favorite book. To those of you who feel the same way: | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
I don't enjoy sharing. [This message was edited Fri Oct 24 19:46:46 PDT 2003 by ImRightBehindYou] Look out behind you. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Look out behind you. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
ImRightBehindYou said: So hard to choose... | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
2the9s said: ImRightBehindYou said: So hard to choose... Look out behind you. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |