One of my best friends recently embarked on a bit of an affair with a colleague. They started out as friends and all that but he now is in a terrible position of having to pick between 2 girls, neither of which he wants to let down.

I'd say, think how much trouble it'd cause to everyone involved and it's easy to see that it just isn't worth it.

Don't mean to sound preachy!

I think you shouldn't beat yourself up too much. I think it's only natural that you'd find someone attractive. That being said, you married for a reason and made a commitment. I'm sure your wife has looked at a man on TV or walking down the street and found him attractive. Nothing wrong with that. It's natural. But at the end of the day, I'm sure she wouldn't want anyone else as her husband but you. If all else fails, be a bit more grabassy at home.

otan said:

Find someone else that peaks your crush mode.. and try to get into them.. Keep reminding yourself that you this person is a no no and hopefully soon you will be infatuated with someone else and uncrush yourself!
Its hard.. but we have faith in you!

justkelley said:

that's really sound advice kelly. think about the things that brought you guys together in the 1st place! and talk to the girl if you feel like you have to...the grabby-ass has got to stop if you want to stop the crush.

this is always something 2 worry about when we/u get married or commit 2 some1. u look out in the WOrld & u see some1 that u connect with & u wish it was like that with u'r Lover/Wife/Husband.

isnt' that a part of Human Nature?

otan said:

You will be getting more than a slap in the face from your wife if you dont keep that beast in its cage

CAMILLE4U said:

Whoops!The above emoicon was supposed to be .
My humblest and sincerist apologies.

Dont forget you are married, however you can still dream, nobody can take your dreams from you.

EllisDee said:

I thought Ellis was the straightest fella on here!

KeithyT said:

...

EllisDee said:

you know I really hate it when you do that! BUDDY-ROO!

KeithyT said:

... you're the greatest, Keithy... ...

peace... ...


... doesn't it feel good to be on the inside of the inside jokes...

otan said:

otan said:

Holier than thou?? U asked for advice, I gave it. I will not get married ever, it's a choice I made. I made it because I don't believe in the concept, but I also strongly believe that if u DO get married, u had better KNOW that u can deal with the things in life that do happen, like crushes, disagreements and other bumps in the road. Lust is just, and only, lust. That isn't (or at least I hope it isn't) why u married your wife, so u should be able to see your LIFE versus the LUST. That is all.

Teacher said:

Fancy a shag?

Cloudbuster said:

U got the general idea, as always... see me in London

Teacher said:

Sadly tho', I don't think London is gonna happen. The amount of stuff I have to do in that week is just daft. The only way that I can buy some time is if I kill a couple of friends.

Cloudbuster said:

JDINTERACTIVE said:

Cloudbuster said:

That's a good Cloudy!

JDINTERACTIVE said:

How's your ass this fine...erm, cold morning?

Cloudbuster said:

Hairy and warm as ever. Taking it along 2 the cop shop soon.

JDINTERACTIVE said:

Hairy!

What are you doing at the cop shop? Been holding up laundrettes again?

Cloudbuster said:

I can help with that

Oh well, another time.

Teacher said:

My evil twin!


But seriously, If anything changes then I'll orgnote you. 'Cos it would be cool to meet you.

EllisDee said:

Yeah, inside jokes

Great

KeithyT said:

...

they are the most wonderful things in life... ...

but not as great as singalongs... ...

Teacher said:

You seem like a hypocrite. I'm a lawyer,hon, and in court could take you to the cleaners. I have seen and heard that you agreed to marry not once, but twice through this site alone. Were they illusions you set up for them,or yourself? How did you feel then? Can you deal with crushes, bumps in the road, etc? How many crushes have YOU had here? You seem to be a love addict (the celibacy vow) who is trying to find herself.

I'm one of the many lurkers who find the constant flip flopping on your part a bit sad and a little self-serving. You always say "I don't care what others think of me" yet it's painfully obvious that you do. Here's one somewhat educated person who thinks you are a bit holier than thou,if only because there are so many transparencies in your telling others how they should live their lives, when you should maybe look at your own. If you wear honesty as a virtue, you will hopefully realize that someday.