I AM SORRY

I'm sorry
To tell you
Santa Claus
Is a myth.
Trolls don't work
All yearlong
For fat lazy ass
Dressed in red
Only once a year
Because it's called
Exploiting.
Nobody watches
If you're being nice
And if you deserve
Presents for him
It's another pretext
Your parents use
So you stop doing
All your shits.

I'm sorry
To tell you
That Rudolph the
Red nosed reindeer
Happened to be
Because it's funny
To have a red nose
Blinking
And look like
A Christmas tree.
They chose him
Since the story
Was getting boring
Now that Santa's wife
Had already been
Stripped.

I'm sorry
To tell you
Easter bunny
Is just a story
For little kids.
It's not pink
Neither yellow
None has ever seen
A rabbit that big.
It's not him
Who paints eggs
And hides them
In your garden
Neither a giant bell
Unless your mom
Is one of them.
Plus chocolate eggs
Do not come out
Of giant duck's ass
But from factories.

I'm sorry
To tell you
Teletubies
Are too weird
They ate TVs
You can see
In they tummy.
You're deceived
Cause you wished
To watch porn movies
Down your belly
When you would be
One of them.
And I've tried
To look at the sun
The laughing child
Does not appear
But after ten minutes
When I started
Hallucinating.

I'm sorry
To tell you
Pokemons
Are just anime
So please
Please stop trying
To fit the cat
In a tennis ball
It does not work
All that good.
As you can see
Its quite too big
To fit in it
Without meowing
To death.
The bright magic
Of the amine's light
Does not show up
But at least
You have the music.

I'm sorry
To tell you
Smurf only exist
In the fifth
Dimension
And mushrooms
Are only to eat
Or sneeze
Not to live in.
Why you think
There are thirty guys
For one girl
But to subjectively
Show the audience
They are all gay
And having
Sausage orgy
In blue thongs.

Deeply sorry.
Could you stop crying ?