this is brilliant shit

-- Let the terrorists know you laugh at their puny fumes by making the universal sign of "you choked!"

liberation said:

you said this to me too not long ago...wassup with that

If you're engulfed in flames, jump out the nearest open window. No one wants to see your smoldering carcass when the elevator doors open.

If a small, obnoxious lighthouse is following you around, putting you in the spotlight at inappropriate times, please consider using our latest hand to hand combat weapon from Japan to fight it off.

For laughs, try rolling a box fan down the stairs of a fallout shelter to scare the hell out of the occupants

The "Marco Polo" childhood system of locating should be implemented in case of nuclear holocaust.

WARNING !!!

Citizens of Texas:

The Blue Sedan of the Apocalypse has been spotted on various Texas highways the last few days. Reports of gas stations being blown up are coming in from all over the country.

The car is recognizable by it's long, red, whipping devil's tail extending from its rear bumper. The car is armed and is to be considered extremely dangerous. If you should spot this car, do not interfer with it's path. Take cover and call responsible authorities. Also See Rev. 13:5-13 for further information.

If radiation approaches, stand behind a single sheet of steel. Radiation is stupid and will not think to go around.

It's not like anyone died...

liberation said:

I'm doing a hit and run tour of the forums Lib

"Try really hard not to think about it."

"If a terrorist comes to your window, tell him to talk to the hand cuz the face ain't listenin'."

This is one of the funniest threads I've read here.

Throwing up gang signs is an effective prevention against a biological attack. Not even deadly sarin gas wants ta fuck wit da Crips!!

If in doubt as to what lay behind the door, give your self a palm reading to see what the Fates have in store for you.

"If you are too stupid to use a volume knob, get close to the radio and cup your hand around your ear."

these are hilarious!