iridescence said:

my issue here is that self control is not as easy as we wish it to be. if mark has started this thread...its possibly already gone further in his mind then we may wish him to have.
we can't change that fact...all mark has to do now is deal with the consequences of it.
like i said...i'm not here to judge him. its not a good situation...i don't have kids...i probably wouldn't be jumping for joy if i had a daughter in this situtaion.
the ideal advice is :sort the marriage out....leave her if you are not happy...only then PLAY.
[This message was edited Wed Aug 20 14:06:02 PDT 2003 by msserendipity]

Marrk said:

Good choice Marrk. however, if the marriage can not be salvaged, maybe you should think about a divorce.

The most important thing here is YOUR happiness. If you want the best for your marriage, don't waste energy messing around. Instead, re-invest your energy in working with your partner to make both your lives happier together. It sounds like this will involve some hard truths, so be prepared to work your issues out. The rewards will be worth it in the long run.

If you've decided in your heart of hearts that your marriage is not what you want anymore, then you need to think about causing your wife as little harm as possible. I think it would be the right thing to do if you first make it clear to her where your mind is, before acting out of place. You owe your marriage that much. Then, you need to be honest with this younger girl about what you want from her, even if you don't know what it is that you want.

Whilst I think it's perfectly natural for you to be in this predicament, it's worthwhile bearing in mind that your wife is just as likely to be looking for / finding fun elsewhere. You need to understand how that makes you feel and either work at winning your wife back, or work at finding your happiness elsewhere. The only real issue in this case, is that you might end up making an irreversible 'mistake' if you don't talk to your wife first. Good luck!

Oh, and to answer your question...no, it's not wrong, but that's not the point. Your happiness is what it's all about.

LennyKravitz said:

Leeenny Kraaavitz Hello

Marrk said:

reality check:

you're old enough to know better. she's a KID.

Lust? No. Lie to another person (your spouse?). Yeah. Fuck a minor? May not be anything wrong with it, depending on the situation, but it's dangerous because it's illegal.

If you're really interested in her, spend the next year(ish) wrapping things up with your wife and taking care of yourself in the aftermath of that, and then get involved with her as a legal adult. Everybody is treated with respect, no regrets.

Good luck.

I lust after them all the time. I'm just not ever seen with them :LOL:

CtheUncanny said:

The poor guy cant help it, he's just going through a mid-life crisis.

Paisley said:

Why do men have to go through a midlife crisis. They liked the same kind of look when they were younger. Why would that change. Who doesn't like perky boobs and a full high behind. He's supposed to settle just because he gets older?

CtheUncanny said:

He doesn't have to settle he can still take it if he wants, it's just that alot of men do go through mid-life crisis.

Paisley said:

And what is a mid life crisis? I have always wondered about this?

CtheUncanny said:

It's when a guy tries to act younger then he really is, he goes out and buys sports cars hoping to attract younger ladies and tries dressing more hip.

Paisley said:

So age is just a number until it comes to this
And i guess this only applies to men(as in your example) :ROLL:

CtheUncanny said:

True, age IS just a number and I'm sure that women also go through a mid-life crisis.

What about a 30 year old woman with a 18 or 19 year old man? If it's all about getting the most out of looks and sex so what's the difference?.

Let's not forget the entire anti-aging-cream-and-whatnot industry financed by middle-aged women who are trying to look 20.

Marrk said:

OH MARK! Hold onto that feeling You've made it to the right decision for all involved.

Yeah Creme LE MER from the SEA. Listen only one thing gonna keep ya young and that's alot of Exercise and eating right and sleeping right. Tons of sex and all fits into that category.

Thank you all.

Muffy said:

exactly

If u want to be with this girl, get out of the marriage. If u're just in it for the sex,

CtheUncanny said:

SHIT!!!
I been goin through a mid-life crisis...
Sence I was 13. WHEN WILL IT END???

msserendipity said:

I agree with sammy, but also this girl is only 17...can she deal with it? If you went back to your wife, if you didnt, a real relationship?


Cos you are 33 and she is 17...think about her, and dont lead her into something that might seem like fun for the moment, but later is something you both deeply regret...

Good Luck!

if you feel like yur marriage is over, isn't it better to seperate from your wife before you do something so hurtful?

have you lost everything in your marriage or in your wife or yourself that made you be married in the first place, have you lost all love?

ummm I am gonna go out on a limb and say maybe not totally wrong if both parties are in consent and of legal age...but it might be a little weird...but who am I to say.