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Afraid of Being in love Okay I'll admit I'm a lil afraid of being totally in love with somebody.Yeah, it's true I do like 2 listen love songs and at times I like the thought of a little romance running through my head, but as far as reality and really letting myself go with somebody scares me literally. I am a very passionate/compassionate type of person. I have no problem with showing someone love who needs it. Like I love kids and I don't care who child it is, I would take care of it like it's my own. So I'm not afraid to showlove, it's just the thought of being in love with somebody who will love me back, if that makes any sense 
Though love is supposed to be all wonderful and everything, why is it so intimindating and scary at the same time? Do you think, in all honesty and truths, most people are afraid to love, which would explain the reasons why they're so much hate it the world. Is it really harder to love then to hate? Are there anybody else who deals with the same situation? Speak up cuz I'm interviewing y'all [This message was edited Wed Jul 23 7:19:10 PDT 2003 by DigitalLisa] | |
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it is harder to love then to hate, MUCH harder
when you hate it doesn't matter what the other person feels, there is no risk but when you love, you take a huge risk, the other person may not feel as much love or may feel nothing and then you are left with some hard feelings to work through that being said, though...it's worth the risk and worth the occasional sorrow...without the lows you can't appreciate the highs | |
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truth here is
one has to learn to love themselves first before they can even begin to love another it has nothing to do with how hard it is to love but how strong and resolute you are to in your quest for knowledge of self it's all about how much work you are prepared to do of what | |
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i have problems that sound kind of similar to yours, lisa. i have a really hard time just completely opening up, and letting everything be known with a relationship.
letting go is a very hard thing to do. Power tends to corrupt; absolute power corrupts absolutely. - Lord Acton | |
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once one conquers the barrier to the secret of self.
then and only then can the journey to face one's fears begin in this instance fear is not a bad thing your soul is telling you that you are not ready to give yourself, once you understand, the path becomes clear. . [This message was edited Wed Jul 23 8:09:30 PDT 2003 by whatitaint] of what | |
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"sometimes I think love is just mythical"
Joni Mitchell 
"...literal people are scary, man literal people scare me out there trying to rid the world of its poetry while getting it wrong fundamentally down at the church of "look, it says right here, see!" - ani difranco | |
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could it be that you had a significant loss in your life, and that the fear is actually of losing the other person (literally or figuratively) after you have opened up to them?
i agree with whatitaint that love is based on the ability to love oneself, although that can be very hard for people to realize. in many ways, we are taught to judge ourselves based on the reaction of others, and thus our self-worth is contingent on outside approval. i've worked through that myself, and know that it's a long process, but well worth every minute of it. | |
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Don't be afraid my dear... you will be better for having experienced the feeling.  ^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect, it means you've decided to look beyond the imperfections... unknown | |
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 I tend not to now, I'm sick of getting hurt. Some women can be crule fuckers!NOTE: THIS ACCOUNT IS NOW CLOSED. PLEASE CONTACT “K A M  L L E” | |
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CAMILLE4U said: I tend not to now, I'm sick of getting hurt. Some women can be crule fuckers!That is to bad CAMILLE... Sorry! ^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect, it means you've decided to look beyond the imperfections... unknown | |
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irresistibleb1tch said: could it be that you had a significant loss in your life, and that the fear is actually of losing the other person (literally or figuratively) after you have opened up to them?
i agree with whatitaint that love is based on the ability to love oneself, although that can be very hard for people to realize. in many ways, we are taught to judge ourselves based on the reaction of others, and thus our self-worth is contingent on outside approval. i've worked through that myself, and know that it's a long process, but well worth every minute of it. u know u somewhat right, i do have a big fear of loosing someone. I don't wanna go in2 big details you know, cuz I gotta save it for therapy later, but i think that's where it comes down to... ur smart how'd you guess that about me  ? | |
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CAMILLE4U said: I tend not to now, I'm sick of getting hurt. Some women can be crule fuckers!i think people are just cruel all 2gether, cuz if you haven't notice women say the same things | |
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DigitalLisa said: irresistibleb1tch said: could it be that you had a significant loss in your life, and that the fear is actually of losing the other person (literally or figuratively) after you have opened up to them?
i agree with whatitaint that love is based on the ability to love oneself, although that can be very hard for people to realize. in many ways, we are taught to judge ourselves based on the reaction of others, and thus our self-worth is contingent on outside approval. i've worked through that myself, and know that it's a long process, but well worth every minute of it. u know u somewhat right, i do have a big fear of loosing someone. I don't wanna go in2 big details you know, cuz I gotta save it for therapy later, but i think that's where it comes down to... ur smart how'd you guess that about me ?i meant to put something in my original reply about not having to go into any detail here, because it's typically a very painful experience. 
i know because i've been there. please know that it can be overcome, and understanding the cause and effect is a big step toward solving the problem - so you're well on your way! | |
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DigitalLisa said: Okay I'll admit I'm a lil afraid of being totally in love with somebody.Yeah, it's true I do like 2 listen love songs and at times I like the thought of a little romance running through my head, but as far as reality and really letting myself go with somebody scares me literally.
Those who have loved are this way because of experience. Is it the same with you? I do believe that rejection of one's love can corrupt one's soul, if one does not love himself. As whatitaint said, love of self (and most importantly to some, love of God) is the foundation of true, healthy love. Though love is supposed to be all wonderful and everything, why is it so intimindating and scary at the same time? Do you think, in all honesty and truths, most people are afraid to love, which would explain the reasons why they're so much hate it the world.
Love is not a pure feeling, it is a faith and commitment in someone. It's a risk. It hurts when the feeling is not mutual. Sometimes, the pain of rejection can cause one to visit their pain on another. You may be right. Is it really harder to love then to hate?
Absolutely. Are there anybody else who deals with the same situation?
Yes, in all respects. Good night, sweet Prince | 7 June 1958 - 21 April 2016
Props will be withheld until the showing and proving has commenced. -- Aaron McGruder | |
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love is vulnerability. maybe that's why it's scary | |
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love hurts when only one's in love...
 you're only as old as you feel..............so how old do i feel 
Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants. | |
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XxAxX said: love is vulnerability. maybe that's why it's scary
well said! In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular. |
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Hey Lisa,
Well, I think for most people their first love is particularly scary, because you are totally unprepared for how overwhelming it can be. You sometimes get in too deep, leave yourself way too vulnerable, and sometimes it backfires. Of course it's all a part of the fun... I think it is valuable to have a few bad experiences of love gone sour under your belt, it makes you stronger
Love does involve vulnerability... but it's important not to drop all your defences I think. Retain your feeling of self, your trust in yourself, and you'll be better equipped for giving someone else the "key" when you meet someone you trust enough. Some people just get too silly with love, and if anything happens to the relationship they feel lost, like they can't survive without that other person in their lives. Ridiculous! I'm not a big fan of sappy ideals of romantic love... real love is trust, partnership, tolerance, patience, and lots of other things. Bringing some happiness into each other's lives before we all die! The best love comes naturally. It sneaks up on you. It's not really hard work, it just grows and flows. Or not. Sometimes it just turns grey, coughs up some blood, and dies 
What colourful imagery... I should call Hallmark to see if they are interested. | |
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I have no idea what you're talking about. Being in love is exquisite. I hope you find what you need. | |
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ian said: Hey Lisa,
Well, I think for most people their first love is particularly scary, because you are totally unprepared for how overwhelming it can be. You sometimes get in too deep, leave yourself way too vulnerable, and sometimes it backfires. Of course it's all a part of the fun... I think it is valuable to have a few bad experiences of love gone sour under your belt, it makes you stronger
Love does involve vulnerability... but it's important not to drop all your defences I think. Retain your feeling of self, your trust in yourself, and you'll be better equipped for giving someone else the "key" when you meet someone you trust enough. Some people just get too silly with love, and if anything happens to the relationship they feel lost, like they can't survive without that other person in their lives. Ridiculous! I'm not a big fan of sappy ideals of romantic love... real love is trust, partnership, tolerance, patience, and lots of other things. Bringing some happiness into each other's lives before we all die! The best love comes naturally. It sneaks up on you. It's not really hard work, it just grows and flows. Or not. Sometimes it just turns grey, coughs up some blood, and dies
What colourful imagery... I should call Hallmark to see if they are interested. Your chatty today aren't you Ian? But what you say is VERY true! In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular. |
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Sweeny79 said: ian said: Hey Lisa,
Well, I think for most people their first love is particularly scary, because you are totally unprepared for how overwhelming it can be. You sometimes get in too deep, leave yourself way too vulnerable, and sometimes it backfires. Of course it's all a part of the fun... I think it is valuable to have a few bad experiences of love gone sour under your belt, it makes you stronger
Love does involve vulnerability... but it's important not to drop all your defences I think. Retain your feeling of self, your trust in yourself, and you'll be better equipped for giving someone else the "key" when you meet someone you trust enough. Some people just get too silly with love, and if anything happens to the relationship they feel lost, like they can't survive without that other person in their lives. Ridiculous! I'm not a big fan of sappy ideals of romantic love... real love is trust, partnership, tolerance, patience, and lots of other things. Bringing some happiness into each other's lives before we all die! The best love comes naturally. It sneaks up on you. It's not really hard work, it just grows and flows. Or not. Sometimes it just turns grey, coughs up some blood, and dies
What colourful imagery... I should call Hallmark to see if they are interested. Your chatty today aren't you Ian? But what you say is VERY true! Yeah, I hate the way all my moderation stuff means I don't often have time for just posting... so I try to make up for it sometimes | |
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ian said: Sweeny79 said: ian said: Hey Lisa,
Well, I think for most people their first love is particularly scary, because you are totally unprepared for how overwhelming it can be. You sometimes get in too deep, leave yourself way too vulnerable, and sometimes it backfires. Of course it's all a part of the fun... I think it is valuable to have a few bad experiences of love gone sour under your belt, it makes you stronger
Love does involve vulnerability... but it's important not to drop all your defences I think. Retain your feeling of self, your trust in yourself, and you'll be better equipped for giving someone else the "key" when you meet someone you trust enough. Some people just get too silly with love, and if anything happens to the relationship they feel lost, like they can't survive without that other person in their lives. Ridiculous! I'm not a big fan of sappy ideals of romantic love... real love is trust, partnership, tolerance, patience, and lots of other things. Bringing some happiness into each other's lives before we all die! The best love comes naturally. It sneaks up on you. It's not really hard work, it just grows and flows. Or not. Sometimes it just turns grey, coughs up some blood, and dies
What colourful imagery... I should call Hallmark to see if they are interested. Your chatty today aren't you Ian? But what you say is VERY true! Yeah, I hate the way all my moderation stuff means I don't often have time for just posting... so I try to make up for it sometimes Cool, I enjoy hearing what you have to say In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular. |
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ian said: Hey Lisa,
Well, I think for most people their first love is particularly scary, because you are totally unprepared for how overwhelming it can be. You sometimes get in too deep, leave yourself way too vulnerable, and sometimes it backfires. Of course it's all a part of the fun... I think it is valuable to have a few bad experiences of love gone sour under your belt, it makes you stronger
Love does involve vulnerability... but it's important not to drop all your defences I think. Retain your feeling of self, your trust in yourself, and you'll be better equipped for giving someone else the "key" when you meet someone you trust enough. Some people just get too silly with love, and if anything happens to the relationship they feel lost, like they can't survive without that other person in their lives. Ridiculous! I'm not a big fan of sappy ideals of romantic love... real love is trust, partnership, tolerance, patience, and lots of other things. Bringing some happiness into each other's lives before we all die! The best love comes naturally. It sneaks up on you. It's not really hard work, it just grows and flows. Or not. Sometimes it just turns grey, coughs up some blood, and dies
What colourful imagery... I should call Hallmark to see if they are interested. u speak the truth ian, i need 2 higher you as my therapist , I'ma print this out fur real [This message was edited Wed Jul 23 19:55:45 PDT 2003 by DigitalLisa] | |
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I'm not afraid of being in love--I'm afraid of never being loved.
Those of you who are lucky enough to have someone who loves you, and you love them: get over the fear and grow the fuck up! | |
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When the mirror of the soul is clean and you find the true reflection of another then the beauty, truth and light of true love can be illuminated and there is nothing to fear, DigitalLisa. -----
take away the miseries and you take away some folks' reason for living. | |
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wordz said: When the mirror of the soul is clean and you find the true reflection of another then the beauty, truth and light of true love can be illuminated and there is nothing to fear, DigitalLisa.
  | |
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wordz said: When the mirror of the soul is clean and you find the true reflection of another then the beauty, truth and light of true love can be illuminated and there is nothing to fear, DigitalLisa.
 | |
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Sometimes it's better just to fuck. "You need people like me so you can point your fuckin' fingers and say, "That's the bad guy." "
Al Pacino- Scarface | |
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I feel you on this one girl...it get burned everytime...so I built my wall of protection so nobody can get in I feel safer that way. | |
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EvilWhiteMale said: Sometimes it's better just to fuck.
 typical man answer | |
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