I got called for jury duty. My employment responsibilities are such that attending will hurt my business.

What can I do?

slm4m said:

Tell them that on religeous (sp) grounds you can not pass judgement on another person unless there are 2 or more witnesses to the event. Therefore that it will be a waste of time to sit and then abstain at the end.
They will let you off.
Sorted
[This message was edited Tue May 27 8:10:17 PDT 2003 by mdiver]

I'm not sure which comic said this, but they said when questioned, to tell the judge "I can tell if someone's guilty just by lookin' at 'em!!"...

Just say this:

"Let me at that guilty bastard! I'll show him some justice!!!"

Seriously...if you give the defendant dirty looks and tell the judge that you don't know if you can be open-minded about the trial (they will ask you most likely) then you'll be dismissed the first day.

wellbeyond said:

It was Gerorge Carlin!

That motherfucker is funny as shit!

Sweeny79 said:

Yes!!...Thank yew...

Ask, "Is this a death penalty case? If so, can I throw the switch? Puhhhleeaaassseee??!!! "

tell them that you must be on the org during that time

shausler said:

...and say "Voomy toom tooms" constantly as they give instructions...

wellbeyond said:

guaranteed

instant

dismisal

shausler said:

If this place is inny indication, it is... 8)

can you say section 8


or since its prince . . .

section


7

I got out of jury duty by having my employer write a letter saying that I needed to be at work because I couldn't survive on the amount I would be paid for going to jury duty. Then I received a letter back saying that I was released from it, but that my name would go back into circulation for it within the next three years. I haven't been summoned again yet.

IceNine said:

Yep, that'll sort it. Nice one.

george carlin also said to tell em you are prejudiced against every race and regligion,..except your own race and religion.

sheeplikeone said:

...but include your own just to make sure.

Get yourself a criminal record, thats what I did.

Haven't been called since.

Just keep yawning and let your eyes wander, and when they ask any questions say "huh, sorry, I wasn't paying attention."

xenon said:

That'll work!

:LOL:

When the guy on trail walks in give him the

where a "yea im drunk" tshirt

Go in spouting racial slurs...That'll probably disqualify you

slm4m said:

I'd recommend contacting the court that summoned you and asking about their policies. I know that the local courts here will give you one deferral if you designate a month within the next 12 months when you'll be available to serve.

[Matt's standard disclaimer: While I am licensed to practice law in Indiana, this post is for discussion purposes only, is not legal advice, and creates no attorney-client relationship.]

or, just show up stinking drunk and clutching a bottle of vodka. refuse to let go of it under ANY circumstances, and if anyone insists that you do claim that you can't because your hand would be lonely. call the bailiff a weenie when he attempts to pry the vodka out of your grasp. that should do it.

matt said:

lawyers...

I'll bet you could get out of jury duty if you went in and farted all over the joint when they were asking questions.

Just say you are related to him/her!

XxAxX said:

I second that.

Otherwise, you could just say you are an orger. You'll be bustled out of there in a flash!

XxAxX said:

You speak from experience, don't you?