Oh my God...

My roommate and I just got back from bike riding. We fixed up our bikes tonight, and set out, we were going for about an hour and decided to come home because it's late and there were a lot of weird homeless men yelling at us.

Back to the subject: One of our pedestrian entrances (our complex is gated) is lower than the sidewalk- you have to go about fifteen steps down to the actual gate, with fencing on both sides. Well, my bike is kinda old, and the brakes are shit, as well as half of the gears.

Michael (my roommate) walked his bike down the steps to unlock the gate. While he was searching for the key, my front tire started slipping off the top step. I clenched the brakes as hard as I could and leaned to the right to get off the seat (which is way too fucking high- I don't remember sitting so high in High School!), and before I had a chance, my bike started sliding down the steps, bumping my already-sore nether area, and crashing halfway down, flipping sideways, breaking the front wheel, smacking into Michael, and throwing me down onto the fucked-up seat, HARD as I slammed into the gate..

I twisted my bad ankle too.

I slid down on the bar writhing in agony, finally knowing what it feels like for a guy when you kick him in the nuts.

My bike is ruined, and Michael had to carry me to our apartment. I sat on the kitchen floor for a while for my ankle, then went right into the shower. As I put my foot over the tub, I looked down.

I have a bruise the size of a softball between my *** and my thigh. It broke the skin in the middle. Here I sit typing, on my left butt cheek and no goddamn pants because they cut right into the booboo. I reckon for a few days I will have to go commando with long skirts at work.

Please hug and kiss me. I hurt.

Someday soon I will laugh about this, so there's no hard feelings if I made your night. I definitely would have to hold it back if it was someone else...

althom said:

Thank you, sweets. I'm orgnoting you.

Aw.
Hope it will heal soon!





All hail FAT BOTTOMED GIRLS!
I want to ride my bicycle.
I want to ride my bike...

tring tring tring tring

Im trying sooo ooo ooo hard not to laugh!

jeremyfaulkner said:

..

btw you get it on tape? j/k

... ...


... geez that sounds horrible...

and so graphic and well described that i hurt down there... and i don't even have one...

but at least one good thing comes of it - an excuse to go commando... ...

Muse2noPharaoh said:

!! Me too! Go ahead, laugh with me!

I'm such a klutz!

jeremyfaulkner said:

Thank you!

Are we allowed to kiss your booboo?

You wanna borrow my night vision goggles next time?

Christopher said:

Not that we know of...

althom said:

...

tape it...

maybecabdriver said:

Oooh, night vision! Cool!



but with a blonde like me, who knows if it would even help...

EllisDee said:

$50.00?

OUCH!

You gonna be ok???

EllisDee said:

If she lets me!

INSATIABLE said:

sounds fair... maybe i'll start a collection plate...

INSATIABLE said:

:Lol: Ok! I adore you!

Hope you aren't TOO sore tommarow!

althom said:

i got faith in ya, man... you're a smooth talker...

Nikster said:

Only of you come feed me soup...

Yeah, I'm fine, other than the friggin ovaries I left in the grass outside... It's really swollen. I've been trying ice, but as you are undoubtedly aware, it's a bit sensitive around there.

EllisDee said:

HA!

INSATIABLE said:

ok... i wasn't even close to laughter until i read this... ...




sorry...

EllisDee said:

:HMM: When is the last time you were in a church?

althom said:

Is that a shocked fall off (good PUN)
Or an amused one?

INSATIABLE said:

althom is a smooth ladies man... he's the sexy private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks...

Muse2noPharaoh said:

probably a lot sooner than you are thinking...

might i add the the lord and i are tight like that... ...
[This message was edited Wed May 21 23:52:05 PDT 2003 by EllisDee]