... And Was Faking His Friendship In Front Of You... But Dissin' You And Your "Kind" Behind Your Back To His Daughter, Who Is Best Friends With Your Daughter...And His Daughter Decides To Tell You, 'Cause She's Tired Of The Game?


This just happened to me... Man, I thought those days were over.








(unracist edit)
[This message was edited Mon May 19 8:37:37 PDT 2003 by June7]

...

damn that's a long thread title...

That's a shame that this happened to you June7. But if this idiot is a racist, you don't need him for a friend. It's a shame you had to find out from a third party, and that this so called "friend" couldn't tell you straight up to your face. I hate racists!

June

Why is this fucker dragging his daughter into it? Reminds me of East is East...

Thanks psycho... and I know about not needing a friend like that and all... but, damn.

Still hurts a little, and it still blows me away.

Natsume said:

Thanks Natsume.

I'm gonna chill for now, I'll tell you guys the whole story later...

racists suck big huge donkey dick, how do u judge a person by their race and not their persoality

at least his daughter appears to be uninfluenced by his racist bullshit... i think i would be careful about how much time your daughter spends around the guy, however...

June7 said:

I can fully understand how you feel, I would be blown away too. It sucks to have something like that happen to you.

CHAOSMAN87 said:

Yeah!!!

I would avoid June 7 because of his personality,
nothing else!

"Man, I thought those days were over"

I really do hate sayin it, BUT, you can never hope to think those days are gone.
Not in our lifetime, or the lifetimes of our children.
We must all do the things that we can do to put such things to rest, but never be ignorant of the smiling face in any race.
Had you not be confronted with this situation, would have thought "racism is dead"??? i certainly hope not.
Racism, like Hate is alive and kickin.
I'ld like to know how you will handle being in close proximity to the two faced bastard from now on wihtout
distroying the friendship of your daughter and his.
you can take the high road but it won't sit well with your neighbor and the others you are UNAWARE of.
STAY STRONG, the truth always comes to lite.

June7 said:

That's fucked up! at least U know where U have him the next
time he give U that phony faked plastic smile.
peace /Manki

Revolution said:

that was great

sorry june had to get that in there

anywhoo what is he saying about you june?

that's despicable. you need to talk to him face to face and tell him that you know what he's been saying, etc...you know, sort it out and let him know that you have no intention of staying in contact with him anymore if he doesn't desist in making such comments about yourself and explains exactly why he has a problem with you and 'your kind'.

that's what i would do.

The coward moron couldn't brainwash his daughter and that's good, I don't think that you should talk to him, he's an adult - concentrate on the ones you love and the good people, imo.

June7 said:

That is disgusting. What a bitch. Last time I checked the year was 2003.

Once my nephew told my sister (his mother) that I had been saying bad things about her...WHICH I HADN'T!!!

My advice is you check for yourself if what the girl says is true or she just made it up because she was angry with her father.

Today children receive much more information thah we used to, so she could have seen something on the TV or wherever and "modify" the story.

I would never spoil a relationship upon words said by anyone.(Unless you have already talked to your neighbor)

00769BAD said:

I agree and as hurtful as the truth may seem, the reality of it is this racist bastard was NEVER your friend to begin with June7. I don't know what his reasoning is but racists tend to talk "behind closed doors" and never directly to the ones they hate. Cowardice is like that.

June7 said:

Sounds like your daughters have a nice friendship, and the three of you all know better. Sometimes people are just inherently ignorant. Kill it with kindness. If you give him attitude right back, its only gonna fuel his judgement of you. You're setting an example for the two kids by being the better person.

sorry..that's messed up...

Sorry for the experience.Each one cuts to the bone sometimes. This shit happens all the time..on the net too. "Thats the way of the world."

rio said:

Thanks man!

well like i always say... it's really no difference between back then and now, the only difference is people are more quite about it and don't call u nigger 2 ur face, but then say it behind ur back when they thinnk u ain't listening i know cuz i work with people like... see back then they'll let u know u was a nigger, they might like u but u still be a nigger...i think i would much rather have how it was back then

Thanks to all who posted.

This was the main topic of conversation between my wife and I this past weekend... and though we may be used to blatant (and even subtle) racism, when it sneaks it's ugly head around to you , and catches you by surprise... it can still throw you for a loop.


Remember my new fence post?

First some background... My daughter is a red belt in Tae Kwon Do. Her friend lives two houses down. I have lived in this neighborhood for over 3 years now, and have talked to her father on a few occasions. His daughter joined Tae Kwon Do last year and now we have a system, I drop the girls off at class and he picks them up after. This has gone on for a over a year now. We do the friendly neighborly wave and small talk when we're around eachother.

This is a predominantly white neighborhood. We are Mexican, our direct neighbor's family is Mexican dad, and Caucasian wife. Across the street and down the block is a Vietnamese family. Two doors down from them is a Philipino family. The rest, mainly white.

My nephew, my very good friend and I were building this fence... preparing to drill holes in these metal pipes that would become the fence posts. "Mike" (the 'racist') happened by to retrieve his mail, as one of those damned community mail boxes is near my fence... and noticed us getting to work. He said he had a power tool that would go right through those metal posts and volunteered to help us with the fence. I thought that was pretty neighborly of him and accepted his offer. Soon, he was over my house drilling holes, and bein' pretty cool. This was an all day project, and he stuck around for the whole 9, in fact, we were the last ones there, still setting up boards when it got dark. The gate was unfinished, and I was going to build that myself the next day. No worries.

During this time, he had brought over a hammer, a sledge hammer, a pry bar and his power drill. All without request. I never asked him to do anything.

When he left, he took his power drill and left his other tools, saying he would be by tomorrow to pick them up, or when we're finished. We were very appreciative of his work, and thankful. Everything was cool.

The next day, I started on the gate. I built it from scratch, and leaned it on the fence where it would be positioned. I was alone, and needed someone to help balance it, so I just boarded up this gate to the fence until my nephew or my buddy could come over and help me balance it.

Meanwhile, Mike came over the day after (I was at work) and left his power drill, saying if I needed it to finish the gate, I could.

During that week I was working and doing finishing up touches on the yard (the fence is not the only project I have going on)... I sprayed the fence with water protecting sealant, cleaned the filter on the pool, etc... etc...

Saturday, I went to his house to return the tools he left at our house, and he asked how the gate was coming along... I told him I was waiting for my nephew to come by to help balance it...etc. He said, "Let's do it now!" I said sure!...and that was that. A couple hours later, the gate was attached, and all was great. Once again, I thanked him for his help and everything was cool.

Saturday night, his daughter "R", came over (as usual) and my wife and I started asking her what her dad liked, what he collected etc... trying to get an idea so we could get him a nice gift for all his help... she told us.. and that was that (or so I thought).

Later that evening, as R was gonna spend the night with my daughter, her and my daughter came up and asked me if we were planning on buying her dad a gift... I said, yeah, and she began to say (very nervously) that perhaps I should reconsider.

R went on to say that her dad may not have been acting out in kindness, but for other reasons. Simply put, that he LOVES to build things... and any reason to use his tools gives him pleasure. In fact, (she went on to say) he often ridicules us openly at the house, calling us "wetbacks" etc.

When he left the tools, he kept complaining that we hadn't returned them, and that it goes to show you, never trust your tools with anyone (remember I never ever asked for them). When the gate wasn't finished promptly, he kept saying everytime they drove by, that he couldn't believe we haven't finished the fence by now, and those "lazy" mexicans can't finish anything... etc.

She said he doesn't consider us his equal, and though he would never say this to my face, thinks I'm "mechanically inept". All the while, she was crying... my daughter was there too, and I remained calm and gave them both a hug.

I told her that I was shocked to hear this as he seemed genuinely nice to us. She said that when her sister had black friends it was the same thing. I complimented her on the ability and strength it took her to confront me and tell me all of this... She said, If I was still gonna get him a gift, that he would accept it, but probably make a comment when I left like, "They should have gotten me something" or that he'd probably use it as a joke later.

I told her that this is not the first time we've had to deal with racism and that were sorry he feels that way. I told her that we were still going to get him a gift as that's the kind of people we are, and regardless of his reasons, it was still very nice of him to help us... what he chooses to do with that gift is up to him. We all "group hugged" again, and that was that.

I told my wife of our conversation, she was shocked. I showered and then came on the .org and told you guys.

That's the whole story.

I've been reading your responses and know that there's several ways to go from here. We decided that we will remain civil with him, continuing on where we left... Do I trust him? No. Will I be suspicious of his future actions and requests? Yes. His daughter is great, we have always found her to be a nice friend to Melly... needless to say, this has definately bummed me out, and has brought back all the memories of past racial situations.

I'm 37 years old. I've not suffered the brunt of racial attacks or blunt racist statements... even this one was behind closed doors, not to my face. But, I've had my share... Everyday you wonder.

I am not blind to the struggles that we deal with on a daily basis... but, I don't dwell on them either. You live your life, you surround yourself with good people and you move on. Sadly, a quick smack on the head will occasionally occur. But, you take your shot, and you get back in line.

I will close with this line from Stevie Wonder.

"You might have the cash, but you cannot cash in your face"

(Sorry this was so long!)

...

damn... that's some heavy shit...

EllisDee said:

Yeah... it was a strange weekend.

But, we cool now.

June7 said:

Man, I was really bummed right here. Trip how some thing so miniscule could fuck your day up... I thought about it all night.

June7 said:

Welcome to the real world.

But before you pop a couple of brainveins check me out.

http://www.prince.org/msg...msg_733503