“WE DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW THIS COULD HAVE HAPPENED”
From our Reporter: Ricardo Martain


Holland: civilians gather in disbelieve and stare at
the apparent lifeless body of IstenSzek, known as a loving
and Caring husband, father and brother in the community.
"He went out walking by the old deserted railroad mill
to get some exercise"; Jane, his lovely 43 year old wife
told the press. "We don’t understand how this could
have happened. It never should have!" adds a neighbour.

Early yesterday evening, Szek (24) went out for his
daily walk by the railroad Mill on Hudson Avenue,
When he failed to return home before midnight, his wife
contacted the local authorities whom shortly thereafter
found the [seemingly] lifeless body of Szek near the mill.

An anonymous source, apparently witness to all that had
happened near the mill yesterday evening, told the press
that he "Saw the doors to the mill open, just as mr Szek
crossed the tracks. Out came this giant train cart , jam
packed with guys in tight shorts and white t-shirts and a
group of women dressed in checked-shirts and clumpy boots.
they all ate rainbowclored cotton candy and blasted Donna
Summer on a portable boombox".

"When they noticed [Szek] on the tracks, the whole crowd
went silent. Then all of a sudden one of them, with a
distinct Essex accent could be heard shouting ‘That’s him,
that’s The puny little bastard. He’s the one who refused to
join our org Mafia club, the retaliating prick!'. At which
words "all hell broke loose" according to this witness.

"It was awful, just awful. I’ve never seen a man give such
hard direct curves with a silverbeaded Westwood purse!".
In addition "The women hit him with the tools from their
Toolbelts". All of this was ignited and led on by their
apparent leader whom they called ‘Xerox’, "or something
that sounded like it".

At this point during our interview with the witness, a
bystander yelled "Well if he’s dead, how come he just got
morning wood?" A local physician was called in to check
the wood out and test it's freshness and duration. He then
concluded that Mr Szek was not dead, only badly bruised and
in a state of shock. Authorities will question Mr Szek
about the attack as soon as he regains consciousness.




Soooo. Looks like someone's gonna have to pay for this!


[This message was edited Fri May 2 4:46:08 PDT 2003 by IstenSzek]

Huh ?? What is in the picture? I can't see anything ??

Are you sure? It shows up fine on my pc. Damn

IstenSzek said:

I can't see it either...

Well, who's gonna pay?

Oh fuck. what if you check the propperties of the little
red cross that shows up? that should supply you with the
link to the pic. Damn. How come you can't see it when I
can? Is it perhaps because I am dead?

IstenSzek said:

that works InstenSzek!

Nurse Tom will take care of you... LMAO

Ahhh, only the good die young !!

If I found out who did this, I get you a nice revenge !!

But can you ask first if that is allowed up there ??

Those bastards!!!

I nver realised my stilleto's were this sharp.
back to platforms?

zobilamouche said:

As official male lesbian of the Org Gay Mafia, I deny we had any involvement in this incident. We are, in no way connected to the attack on Mr. Szek. If we were involved (which we are not) then it would serve as a stern warning to those who dare to mess with the OGM. Mr. Szek probably just tripped on his wooden shoes!

JediMaster said:

::stands behind Jedi and nods::

you're like tom in the godfather, jedi... the only non-family member who was adopted in

Well done, my Mafia-ettes.

Tea and pastries at my house later for all those involved.

cborgman said:

:woOt:

Haystack said:

Wait, can we also have beer? Me & the lesbians want beer!

da horror!!!

wow, u guys are mo' fierce than i first thought...

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

Well, for the right price, we can keep you safe. Wouldn't want anything bad to happen to you, like what happened to that poor shlep in Holland. Of course, we have no idea what happened there, but we can make sure that it doesn't happen to you!

JediMaster said:

so like, you're makin me an offer i can't refuse...?

IsTeN dIed FoR HiS CriMes AgAinst HoMonItY.

Wait a minute!

I'm no detective, but it seems odd that Isten is dead yet still posting.
[This message was edited Fri May 2 8:48:00 PDT 2003 by Aerogram]

Aerogram said:

hmmm...

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

Just wouldn't want anything like this to happen to you:

Haystack said:

Don't you mean canoles? (sp)

...and is it true? Does IstenSzek sleep with the fishes?

JediMaster said:

Yes.. I can just see it... Isten's dead poodle at the foot of his antique baldequin bed.

Beware!

JediMaster said:

uhhh...okay u guys, ya'll can be my bodyguards n'stuff. noddin really fast

but i don't own any horses....s'like, i'd end up findin kirky j's head at the foot of my bed or sumfin?



drop the cannoli edit
[This message was edited Fri May 2 8:56:58 PDT 2003 by Handclapsfingasnapz]

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

<

I was so sure he was dead I didn't read the whole article.

Aerogram said:

uh oh...