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Thread started 06/21/20 5:57am

KingBAD

"KingBAD… I know you've been drinkin' at the club, but get up here and play this guitar!!!"

"...third in line was me..."

A 54-year-old accountant leaves a letter for his wife one evening which read:

"Dear Wife, I am 54 years old, and by the time you get this letter

I will be at the Grand Hotel with my beautiful and sexy eighteen year old secretary."

When he arrived at the hotel, there was a letter waiting for him that read as follows:

"Dear Husband, I too am 54 years old,

and by the time you receive this letter

I will be at the Savoy Hotel with my eighteen year old toy boy.

Because you are an accountant,

you will surely appreciate that l8 goes into 54

many more times than 54 goes into 18."

Little Johnny was in class and the teacher announced that

they were going to try something different to help everyone

get to know each other a little better, and to help with their spelling.
She explained,

"I want you to stand up and give us the occupation of your father,

spell it, and say one thing he would give us all if he was here today."
The first student raised her hand to volunteer.
"Marcy," the teacher said. "You may go first."
Marcy replied, "My father is a banker.

B-A-N-K-E-R and if he was here today,

he would give us all a shiny new penny."
The teacher said, "Very nice, Marcy, who wants to go next?"
Kevin stood up and announced,

"My father is a baker.

B-A-K-E-R and if he was here today,

he would give us all a freshly-baked cookie."
"Very good," the teacher told Kevin.
Jeff was next, and he said,

"My father is an accountant. A-K, no wait, A-C-K, no..."
Before he could attempt to spell it once more,

the teacher cut him off and told him to sit back down and

to think about it for a while.

When he thought he knew how to spell it,

he could stand back up and try again.
Little Johnny raised his hand in excitement

hoping to be acknowledged by the teacher.

The teacher called on little Johnny to go next.
Johnny said, "My father is a bookie.

B-O-O-K-I-E and if he was here today,

he would give us all 20:1 odds

Jeff will never be able to spell "accountant"


i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking
"KingBAD, well you are just a troll" (an emotional fan)
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Reply #1 posted 06/21/20 7:50pm

purplethunder3
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lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol

......................................................................................

What is politics?

A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?"

Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me capitalism. Your Mom, she's the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the people. The nanny, we'll consider her the Working Class. And your baby brother, we'll call him the Future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense,"

So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said.

Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper. So the little boy goes to his parents' room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed. The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now."

The father says, "Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about."

The little boy replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep shit."

"Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination and life to everything." --Plato
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Reply #2 posted 06/22/20 9:11am

luv4u

Moderator

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moderator

lol

Edmonton, AB - canada
Mod Goddess of the SNIP & BAN Making Moves - OF4S
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Reply #3 posted 06/23/20 8:38am

KingBAD

“With cigarettes,

my wife and I, we made a deal.

We only smoke after sex.

I've got the same pack now since 1975.

What bothers me is my wife.

She's up to three packs a day.”

"KingBAD… I'd fly for your painted rainbow."

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking
"KingBAD, well you are just a troll" (an emotional fan)
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Reply #4 posted 06/24/20 5:42pm

XxAxX

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funny-golf-animated-gif-14.gif05-09-14-woodland-bunker.gif

[Edited 6/24/20 17:43pm]

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Reply #5 posted 06/24/20 5:49pm

XxAxX

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