A farmer ordered a high-tech milking machine.

When the equipment arrived, his wife was out of town,

so he decided to test it on himself first.

He inserted his penis into the the black suction type thing

and then turned the switch on and everything else was automatic.

Soon, he realized that the equipment provided him

with as much pleasure as his wife did.

When the fun was over, he quickly realized that he

couldn't remove the instrument from his penis.

He read the manual but didn't find any useful information.

He tried every button on the instrument, but still without success.

Finally, the farmer decided to call the supplier's

Customer Service Hot Line.

"Hello, I just bought a milking machine from your company.

It works fantastic, but how do I remove it from the cow's udder?"

"Don't worry, " replied the customer service rep,

"The machine will release automatically

once it's collected two quarts."

Where does the Queen keep her army? In her sleevy.

What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?


Kids won't eat their broccoli.

S2DG said:

purplethunder3121 said:

A guy was acing his interview

purplethunder3121 said:

A guy was acing his interview

when the employer said "well you look great but I see here there was a 7 year gap since your last job, what happened there?".

The guy says "oh I went to yale".

The employer: "oh great!! Well you're hired, you start Monday"

Guy: "Yay! I got a yob!"

S2DG said:

Where does the Queen keep her army? In her sleevy.

What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?


Kids won't eat their broccoli.

I posted this on Facebook. It got some laughs, so, whatever...

He-he. So, being a loner is finally paying off. I'm doing this solitary confinement like a boss. While some of you are ready to stab your spouse in the neck with a rusty nail, and others are one step from dropping the kids off at the local Fire Station(or somebody's front porch), I'm just sitting here, chilling.....just me and the little friends in my head. We do have some interesting conversations...😃😂😛

SERIOUSLY though, you all stay safe and sane.🙏

JoeyC said:

I posted this on Facebook. It got some laughs, so, whatever...

He-he. So, being a loner is finally paying off. I'm doing this solitary confinement like a boss. While some of you are ready to stab your spouse in the neck with a rusty nail, and others are one step from dropping the kids off at the local Fire Station(or somebody's front porch), I'm just sitting here, chilling.....just me and the little friends in my head. We do have some interesting conversations...😃😂😛

SERIOUSLY though, you all stay safe and sane.🙏

What're you Talking about? You got (hopefully) high speed INTERNET! (us, video-conferencing or audio chats with whoever you like, and so on....?)

domainator2010 said:

JoeyC said:

I posted this on Facebook. It got some laughs, so, whatever...

What're you Talking about? You got (hopefully) high speed INTERNET! (us, video-conferencing or audio chats with whoever you like, and so on....?)

YOU PEOPLE ARE REAL???

purplethunder3121 said:

A guy was acing his interview

when the employer said "well you look great but I see here there was a 7 year gap since your last job, what happened there?".

The guy says "oh I went to yale".

The employer: "oh great!! Well you're hired, you start Monday"

Guy: "Yay! I got a yob!"

purplethunder3121 said:

A guy was acing his interview

when the employer said "well you look great but I see here there was a 7 year gap since your last job, what happened there?".

The guy says "oh I went to yale".

The employer: "oh great!! Well you're hired, you start Monday"

Guy: "Yay! I got a yob!"

alphastreet said:

Oh yikes, hope I don’t look like that when I stop wearing a mask

a lot of people can't accept improvement...

and i'm not a fan of havin imitations of me anyway....

if i knew what you looked like i'm sure i wouldn't have

wanted to look that way ever...

ThisOne said:

Which US state is famous for is extra small soft drinks?????




Mini-soda



Sorry

purplethunder3121 said:

purplethunder3121 said:

virus-free virtual hug

alphastreet said:

Feeling kind of sad today cause the client was positive for covid, and another client got it and died please pray for them. I got tested for it but am negative thankfully [Edited 4/29/20 18:43pm]

XxAxX said: